You’re going to need to find ways to stimulate the pup’s mind as well so that he doesn’t get into trouble. A snuffle mat, lick mats, puzzle toys, the balls attached to suction cups, perhaps one of those gadgets that throws a ball for the dog and the dog drops the ball back into it. Engage your kids in teaching him some easy tricks, like shaking hands. Make sure he has plenty of chew toys.

It’s mind boggling that elderly people with mobility issues would adopt a border collie puppy, especially since they’ve owned dogs before. That seems like a rookie mistake. I’m so sorry that you’re going to be the one who has to pay for their mistake. Are they both retired? If so, I don’t understand how weekends are any different than weekdays for them. Maybe they just want to see the dog a little each week and think that taking him on the weekends makes your life easier. See if they could take him two weekdays instead and then your husband can care for the dog on the weekends.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What breed of dog is this, or is it some doodle creation?

A border collie

That is a VERY active breed. He's going to need a ton of movement. The border collies I've known (admittedly only a few, I'm certainly no expert) would not be satisfied with walks, they needed to run. A yard or someplace they could fetch a ball were a necessity, unless you have a serious runner in the house that can take the dog along.

I also worry that for a dog with anxiety, going back and forth between two houses weekly is going to be detrimental. It'll be better for the dog to learn a routine and get comfortable with its surroundings. If there is any way to keep it in one place, I would really try to do that.

How old are your kids? When you do mid day walks, they can come with you- make it fun and gets the kids tired out too.

Border Collie will be an active dog. I was going to suggest some kind of temporary fence you could use but not sure of one good for this dog (mine is smaller). If you had a fenced area, you could have the kids toss tennis balls to the dog.

Other PPs flagged the possibility that the dog could bite the kids (if anxious or not familiar with kids). You may need to supervise to be sure. I assume DH would agree dog needs to go if it bites your kids.

Anonymous wrote:What breed of dog is this, or is it some doodle creation?

A border collie

What breed of dog is this, or is it some doodle creation?

Anonymous wrote:11:36 here. This jumped out at me from your reply:

.....I honestly feel that if I were to question it again, it would be very damaging to our relationship. He's already very hurt that I even brought up concerns and have not been falling over myself to help them out in this situation.


In the above, you're saying you need to walk on eggshells around your husband with consideration only for his feelings. You're the one doing all the work. I really hope your husband is a better partner in other aspects of your life together, because he sure isn't showing you, your feelings, or your need to do your own work any consideration. Seems quite lopsided to me.

He's not like this with all things. He just gets really weird with certain things in a way that makes him only able to see his side of things and unable to compromise or have a calm discussion about it.

11:36 here. This jumped out at me from your reply:

.....I honestly feel that if I were to question it again, it would be very damaging to our relationship. He's already very hurt that I even brought up concerns and have not been falling over myself to help them out in this situation.


In the above, you're saying you need to walk on eggshells around your husband with consideration only for his feelings. You're the one doing all the work. I really hope your husband is a better partner in other aspects of your life together, because he sure isn't showing you, your feelings, or your need to do your own work any consideration. Seems quite lopsided to me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have your husband take off work the first day or two to help transition the dog in and work on a schedule with the dog.

This is a good idea. If he is unwilling to do this, ask him why he's signing you up for it. Is he in the habit of unilaterally assigning you work?

Agree. He gets first and last walks of the day and all house accidents when he’s home (unless kids are old enough to help). You get stuck with work hours.

He's gone by 7:30a and home at 6:30p but then continues working for a couple hours after he gets home. Are first and last walks feasible for him?

Yes, absolutely. First walk of the day for my dog is 6-7 am. He gets up earlier and builds that into his day. And the night-time walk (short) is around 9 or 10 pm. OP, I hear you saying that this is touchy for him but this is the BARE MINIMUM that the guy who signed you up (without your agreement!) for weeks of all-day dog care should be doing.

If he cannot or will not, then the answer is that you should absolutely never get a dog and need to draw a line in the sand with him that you won't dog-sit for this dog again.

Ok, that makes me feel a little better - if he's able to do first and last walks of the day, that would be a huge help and I think he'd be willing to do them.

I work 12-13 hours a day but still do the big walk w/ our dogs in the morning first thing i do before anyone else in the house gets up, and also the after dinner and right before bed walks. That leaves my spouse w/ only a few short walks during the day for the dogs to go to the bathroom but not their main exercise/stimulation out of their system walks. I wanted the dogs my sah spouse was not super excited about getting them. It is totally doable and I find the time walking the dogs pretty theraputic - they dont' want anything complicated and its is a way to force myself away from my desk. There is no reason your husband can't commit to this type of schedule if he wants the dog in your home

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have your husband take off work the first day or two to help transition the dog in and work on a schedule with the dog.

This is a good idea. If he is unwilling to do this, ask him why he's signing you up for it. Is he in the habit of unilaterally assigning you work?

Agree. He gets first and last walks of the day and all house accidents when he’s home (unless kids are old enough to help). You get stuck with work hours.

He's gone by 7:30a and home at 6:30p but then continues working for a couple hours after he gets home. Are first and last walks feasible for him?

Yes, absolutely. First walk of the day for my dog is 6-7 am. He gets up earlier and builds that into his day. And the night-time walk (short) is around 9 or 10 pm. OP, I hear you saying that this is touchy for him but this is the BARE MINIMUM that the guy who signed you up (without your agreement!) for weeks of all-day dog care should be doing.

If he cannot or will not, then the answer is that you should absolutely never get a dog and need to draw a line in the sand with him that you won't dog-sit for this dog again.

Anonymous wrote:A high-anxiety, untrained dog? If they can't care for it, they need to rehome it. I have two puppies: one is 13 months old and the other is 9 months old.

Unless you can keep an eye on the dog, it will need to be crated so you will have to weigh that constantly. For example, after the dog has been crated all day you are not going to want to crate him to run errands after work, take your kids to sports practice, etc. This is all for a normal puppy, let alone one with high anxiety and zero training.

You have no idea what you are in for. Do not agree to this.

We've already agreed to it, the goal now is to make the best of it and figure this out in a way that works for our family. And yes, I agree with you - I really don't have an idea of what we are in for!

Anonymous wrote:This will become your dog. They will not recollect it after.

#facts.

Anonymous wrote:I would be very hurt that he is not willing to hear you out on your concerns. This is a huge ask to be responsible for another living creature in your home for serveral weeks, with little to no help.

It is sometimes hard for me to gauge if I am just being overly anxious about the whole thing, or if he is being overly passe. Of course he thinks I'm just being overly anxious, but he also kinda gets that I am that way because I have never been around dogs growing up.

A high-anxiety, untrained dog? If they can't care for it, they need to rehome it. I have two puppies: one is 13 months old and the other is 9 months old.

Unless you can keep an eye on the dog, it will need to be crated so you will have to weigh that constantly. For example, after the dog has been crated all day you are not going to want to crate him to run errands after work, take your kids to sports practice, etc. This is all for a normal puppy, let alone one with high anxiety and zero training.

You have no idea what you are in for. Do not agree to this.

Anonymous wrote:Your DH working 60-65 hour weeks is your biggest problem.

Also, breeder dogs are the worst; your MIL should have adopted.

They are not!