Sounds very nice. I would do summer camps at the beach town and then leave mid-August to take a family vacation before school. You can do morning only camps if you choose, and then everyone can head to the club/beach for the afternoon. You will also probably be able to find babysitters/summer nanny to help out, especially with the one who is too young for camp.

Did you already rent for a summer and now plan to buy, OP? If not I’d see how you actually like it before jumping to purchase.

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think it's worth exploring. You might want to rent for a few weeks first before you commit to buying. Also, spending 6 weeks at the beach vs. an entire summer is a good compromise.

We have a second home near the beach (no pool, no country club). Our kids love it because the beach itself is never boring to them. They always find other kids to play with, and we've met several families who go there regularly.

Another vote for renting a few summers before deciding. And renting for long periods not just a week.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i guess your kids don't play any summer sports? odd

I don't know anyone whose children play summer sports unless you are talking about swim club, and even that is a very small group. What summer sports do your kids play?

NP. Sports would be my concern too actually, because it’s a huge part of our lives. OP’s kids are young now but this would shut the door on this option for her kids. In our area (NJ), summer is huge for baseball, lacrosse and some basketball leagues. Football and other fall sports start preseason weeks before school begins too.

That being said, I do also know a lot of non-sport families who do exactly this - decamp to the shore for the summer putting kids in swim and sail camps from that location. The key is that they tend to be in shore towns with a lot of returning families year after year so the social network for the kids is close knit.

It’s all about the type of lifestyle your family wants to live, I’ve seen very happy family summers with either option!

I don’t get families like this. I see travel teams all of the time when I travel for work and I just don’t get it. If it is your thing, fine. But we enjoy our summers at the beach and still get in plenty of physical activities. It’s even weirder when kids miss out on other opportunities because of sports. DS did a 10 day trip to Europe and a bunch of kids didn’t go because of sports commitments.

It’s fine if it’s not your thing. In our case, it’s very hectic June and July due to sports tournaments, and we do both Europe and the beach in August. For us it’s the best of all worlds and we wouldn’t want an entire summer at the beach. Regardless if you are planning to do an entire summer away, you should recognize you can’t do it all and that what you child wants at age 13 is different than what he wants at age 1.

Anonymous wrote:We purchased a second home at the beach. I wouldn't worry about the kids. They will make new friends in the area.

No one is ever bored. The big decision of the day is beach or pool. Plus, there will likely be other activities nearby that you only get to do when you are there.

Whether they will make new friends really depends on the exact location.

OP, I think it's worth exploring. You might want to rent for a few weeks first before you commit to buying. Also, spending 6 weeks at the beach vs. an entire summer is a good compromise.

We have a second home near the beach (no pool, no country club). Our kids love it because the beach itself is never boring to them. They always find other kids to play with, and we've met several families who go there regularly.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i guess your kids don't play any summer sports? odd

I don't know anyone whose children play summer sports unless you are talking about swim club, and even that is a very small group. What summer sports do your kids play?

NP. Sports would be my concern too actually, because it’s a huge part of our lives. OP’s kids are young now but this would shut the door on this option for her kids. In our area (NJ), summer is huge for baseball, lacrosse and some basketball leagues. Football and other fall sports start preseason weeks before school begins too.

That being said, I do also know a lot of non-sport families who do exactly this - decamp to the shore for the summer putting kids in swim and sail camps from that location. The key is that they tend to be in shore towns with a lot of returning families year after year so the social network for the kids is close knit.

It’s all about the type of lifestyle your family wants to live, I’ve seen very happy family summers with either option!

I don’t get families like this. I see travel teams all of the time when I travel for work and I just don’t get it. If it is your thing, fine. But we enjoy our summers at the beach and still get in plenty of physical activities. It’s even weirder when kids miss out on other opportunities because of sports. DS did a 10 day trip to Europe and a bunch of kids didn’t go because of sports commitments.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i guess your kids don't play any summer sports? odd

I don't know anyone whose children play summer sports unless you are talking about swim club, and even that is a very small group. What summer sports do your kids play?

NP. Sports would be my concern too actually, because it’s a huge part of our lives. OP’s kids are young now but this would shut the door on this option for her kids. In our area (NJ), summer is huge for baseball, lacrosse and some basketball leagues. Football and other fall sports start preseason weeks before school begins too.

That being said, I do also know a lot of non-sport families who do exactly this - decamp to the shore for the summer putting kids in swim and sail camps from that location. The key is that they tend to be in shore towns with a lot of returning families year after year so the social network for the kids is close knit.

It’s all about the type of lifestyle your family wants to live, I’ve seen very happy family summers with either option!

Pick an area where there are camps too. no reason kids can't still do a few camps during the summer at your vacation home.

My kids are older (15 & 17), but you are describing our life...and it is WONDERFUL. If you are family that loves the beach, it is a great gift for your kids (and your marriage).

Right now, your kids are probably at the hardest age to enjoy a summer away because they aren't independent. But summers at home will involve lots of planning on your part, too - so lean into summer beach fun. Day camps at the club, family day trips around the area, kayaking in marshland, a day dedicated to all the tourist trap activities, etc. etc. We learned all about local shells and wildlife and then would collect (shells) or search for birds and crabs.

Let me give you a glimpse of what the future holds for you...we belong to the local country club and my kids spend every waking moment of the summer engaged in activities with friends. They play tennis in the cooler hours and then spend all day in a never ending rotation of beach/pool/beach/pool. They are exceptionally strong swimmers and very skilled at surfing, boogie boarding, skim boarding, paddle boarding. They leave the house each morning after checking the surf conditions with the right gear on their golf cart and they are gone all day long. Because we spend all summer at the beach, they have so many friends. It is exactly like the carefree childhood that I had in the 70's and 80's.

As they've gotten older, my kids have taken local jobs - babysitting, teaching surfing, working at the ice cream shop, bussing tables at restaurants. There are tons of work opportunities at the beach!

My husband and I enjoy the easier pace of life. Morning walks on the beach. Sunset cocktails. I've taken on a part time job that I can do remotely, so I work in the morning and join the kids at the beach in the afternoon. Also, living out of the area during the summer can give school friendships a little space to breathe. It is a great way to detach from middle school drama. We have a few school friends who come and stay with us for a week or two, but only friends that are comfortable with the beach life.

If the waves are great in the off season, our friends text us and we head down for the weekend to surf. We use our house all year long, although most of it is during the summer.

I cannot recommend living at the beach living enough!!

I get you OP. All summer with a 2 year to entertain sounds like a lot of work.

But I appreciate that you see how helpful this would be to your husband. In that vein, I'd try to figure out how to make it more appealing to you too. Negotiate what you need . . . a two week break at home, or the house has to be close enough to drive easily home for a few days, or an agreement to still do a big trip each summer, etc.

My family bought a beach house 1.5 hours away when I was 11. We got summer jobs there in high school. Now my mom summers there and we go up whenever we can . . . we spent two weeks there this summer. Our middle schooler is starting to get angsty when we want to be away from home for long stretches away from their friends, but I imagine if you start young it will just be the norm. Make sure it's a place with room for friends when they get older.

I guess I'd keep in mind that for your husband, this is about the mental break that summer on the beach will provide. He imagines spending the whole summer there. In reality you'd probably have various reasons to return home for a bit. That's just not part of his fantasy.

We know one family that does this - they have a beach house in the same location as family, the moms are teachers, and it’s a big “cousin camp” summer with multiple adults to take older kids to the library or on a bike ride while little ones nap. Their oldest is going into 4th grade and this is the first year she realized and was upset about missing out on things with her friends - summer swim team, day camps together, casual running around the neighborhood, etc.

I’m with you OP - it sounds great for 2-4 weeks - especially if another family can join for a long weekend. But ALL summer? That sounds annoying if you don’t have friends, family, and community in the beach location.

I would rent for a month next summer and see if you can break into any groups of moms and activities.

we have this in my home country where I grew up and where my mom also spent her summers. its magical if you can do it. its not boring at all. we are by a body of water which helps.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i guess your kids don't play any summer sports? odd

Not odd at all. Kids need a break from organized sports. We shut it down during the summer.

Agree completely

+1 such a huge benefit

We purchased a second home at the beach. I wouldn't worry about the kids. They will make new friends in the area.

No one is ever bored. The big decision of the day is beach or pool. Plus, there will likely be other activities nearby that you only get to do when you are there.