Anonymous
08/19/2022 18:54
Subject: Is it rude to sit with your back to someone?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It sends a pretty clear message about what they think about you and your role in this group.
Yeah. Agree.
For the record, I’m a Black woman, and they are both white women. (One is young; one is about the same age as me.)
[OP]
Yeah, and I’m sure you’re telling everything truthfully and as it happened. Suuuurrreee!
NP here,
I'm aalso a black woman and this is the treatment we are used to. Like do you realize that a WOC is saying that she felt slighted/not taken seriously and your response is to... not take her seriously. You're trying to insinuate that what she described is unlikely, but you're literally doing the same thing.
Thank you, PP. I usually ignore posters like that.
That shit is exhausting.
[OP]
Anonymous
08/19/2022 00:32
Subject: Is it rude to sit with your back to someone?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It sends a pretty clear message about what they think about you and your role in this group.
Yeah. Agree.
For the record, I’m a Black woman, and they are both white women. (One is young; one is about the same age as me.)
[OP]
Yeah, and I’m sure you’re telling everything truthfully and as it happened. Suuuurrreee!
NP here,
I'm aalso a black woman and this is the treatment we are used to. Like do you realize that a WOC is saying that she felt slighted/not taken seriously and your response is to... not take her seriously. You're trying to insinuate that what she described is unlikely, but you're literally doing the same thing.
I’m the white person who posted that I think black people often have better manners and are more conscious of body language etc than white people, especially white northeasterners.
No doubt sometimes white people are treating black people with less respect because of racism, including unconscious racism. But many times I think it’s just a cultural difference. Many white people don’t see it as necessary to, say, nod or say hello to someone they pass in the corridors, black or white. They’re thinking about something else. Then the black person assume it’s because they are black when really it’s just the white person wasn’t raised to be more polite.
Anonymous
08/18/2022 23:47
Subject: Is it rude to sit with your back to someone?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It sends a pretty clear message about what they think about you and your role in this group.
Yeah. Agree.
For the record, I’m a Black woman, and they are both white women. (One is young; one is about the same age as me.)
[OP]
Yeah, and I’m sure you’re telling everything truthfully and as it happened. Suuuurrreee!
NP here,
I'm aalso a black woman and this is the treatment we are used to. Like do you realize that a WOC is saying that she felt slighted/not taken seriously and your response is to... not take her seriously. You're trying to insinuate that what she described is unlikely, but you're literally doing the same thing.
Anonymous
08/18/2022 19:16
Subject: Re:Is it rude to sit with your back to someone?
Lol, did anyone else notice how all the replies were uniform in saying it was rude until the race element was added and the next few replies immediately started in on mitigating circumstances?
Anonymous
08/18/2022 18:15
Subject: Is it rude to sit with your back to someone?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It sends a pretty clear message about what they think about you and your role in this group.
Yeah. Agree.
For the record, I’m a Black woman, and they are both white women. (One is young; one is about the same age as me.)
[OP]
I’m white and I think African Americans often have better manners and are more conscious of such things like body language, selling hello to people you pass in the hall way, giving your chair to old people. This is especially true when compared to white people
reared in the north (I was raised in both the north and the south)
+2
I’m biracial (Latina and white) and grew up in DC. All of my teachers and 90% of my classmates growing up were black. Black people are SO much more conscious of respect, tone, formalities, and proper behavior. So much is communicated nonverbally, too. Living in white majority places since makes me distinctly uncomfortable.
+3 Iranian American woman here and have noticed this too! Big difference in the manners of white vs black Americans as a whole.
For what it’s worth it’s very rude to have your back to someone in my culture. The person who does this accidentally will actually apologize for having their back to you and then turn around to face you.
Anonymous
08/18/2022 18:10
Subject: Is it rude to sit with your back to someone?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It sends a pretty clear message about what they think about you and your role in this group.
Yeah. Agree.
For the record, I’m a Black woman, and they are both white women. (One is young; one is about the same age as me.)
[OP]
I’m white and I think African Americans often have better manners and are more conscious of such things like body language, selling hello to people you pass in the hall way, giving your chair to old people. This is especially true when compared to white people
reared in the north (I was raised in both the north and the south)
+2
+3 Iranian American woman here and have noticed this too! Big difference in the manners of white vs black Americans as a whole.
For what it’s worth it’s very rude to have your back to someone in my culture. The person who does this accidentally will actually apologize for having their back to you.
I’m biracial (Latina and white) and grew up in DC. All of my teachers and 90% of my classmates growing up were black. Black people are SO much more conscious of respect, tone, formalities, and proper behavior. So much is communicated nonverbally, too. Living in white majority places since makes me distinctly uncomfortable.
Anonymous
08/18/2022 18:03
Subject: Is it rude to sit with your back to someone?
I don't think this is a black/white, high value/low value thing. Rather as a PP already stated, a lack of manners there, lack of awareness that it is rude to carry on a conversation with someone in a small area, with their back basically turned to the other person.
I'm southern, and was always taught to include everyone in a small group, expand the circle if someone new approaches, etc. This doesn't happen when I moved north.
I'm southern, and was always taught to include everyone in a small group, expand the circle if someone new approaches, etc. This doesn't happen when I moved north.
Anonymous
08/18/2022 17:47
Subject: Is it rude to sit with your back to someone?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It sends a pretty clear message about what they think about you and your role in this group.
Yeah. Agree.
For the record, I’m a Black woman, and they are both white women. (One is young; one is about the same age as me.)
[OP]
I’m white and I think African Americans often have better manners and are more conscious of such things like body language, selling hello to people you pass in the hall way, giving your chair to old people. This is especially true when compared to white people
reared in the north (I was raised in both the north and the south)
You know what, you make a really good point here.
[OP]
Anonymous
08/18/2022 14:29
Subject: Is it rude to sit with your back to someone?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It sends a pretty clear message about what they think about you and your role in this group.
Yeah. Agree.
For the record, I’m a Black woman, and they are both white women. (One is young; one is about the same age as me.)
[OP]
They don't think you're going to add much or say anything meaningful so they are angling towards more high value people. Is this a work situation?
More high value people?
Barf.
Well, yeah. If the boss is in the room people probably turn their chairs to better see or hear and don't really care if Linda from Accounts Payable gets boxed out.
Why is it always Linda who gets shafted? It's really rude
I actually worked for several years in a company where the accountant was called Linda. Is this a thing?