Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1, net worth higher than 10 mil
2. 6 kids aged 36-28
3.left home at 17 no assistance

Each got the same
We pay cell bill and car insurance til graduation from college once they got jobs cut off. Each got car like an old civic or rav 4 to use from sophomore year college til they buy their own after jobs we gained. All worked summers in HS and college . Undergrad we paid for most things they contributed with summer jobs and jobs during the year. Grad school they paid everything except we paid for health ins til age 26.

I grew up with nothing.
I know what it is like to go to bed hungry.

It is not lost on me that we are extremely lucky,

I don’t get this tough love approach. As long as they are on the right track why not help more?

My parents were like this. It worked in two out of three cases. My brother was very immature and should’ve had more guidance. Instead, my parents cut him off and he had to hunt for his own food. He eventually figured it out.

Anonymous wrote:I'm a divorced parent ($250k income) of an employed recent college graduate. I'd prefer to just give DC the annual gift tax exemption ($15k) but DC doesn't want any support for basic living expenses, despite pursuing a field with very low starting salaries. I'd rather help her live better now than wait until after I'm dead. I have and continue to contribute as much as allowed into a Roth for DC and keep DC on my health plan. DC also uses all my streaming accounts and periodical subscriptions. DC's other parent ($500k+ income) helped with lease security and covers the cell phone.

Yes, if you have the $$$ to give and want/are able to help your grown kids, why not help them while you are alive? Yes, my kids can function on their own, but as long as they are working hard and "could manage alone" why would I not make life easier for them? No point in giving them $5M when I die if I can help make a better life for them now.

I'm a divorced parent ($250k income) of an employed recent college graduate. I'd prefer to just give DC the annual gift tax exemption ($15k) but DC doesn't want any support for basic living expenses, despite pursuing a field with very low starting salaries. I'd rather help her live better now than wait until after I'm dead. I have and continue to contribute as much as allowed into a Roth for DC and keep DC on my health plan. DC also uses all my streaming accounts and periodical subscriptions. DC's other parent ($500k+ income) helped with lease security and covers the cell phone.

Our kids are 25 and 22.

(1) Our income is $360K/year and net worth about $5M

(2) We paid for their undergraduate education (no loans) and bought DC1 a car when he graduated (he contributed about 1/3 of the price), as well as a "capsule wardrobe" of work clothes and items for his kitchen. We also fund his Roth IRA every year ($6K).

We will do the same for DC 2, who graduates in May '23.

They are both on our family cellphone plan and we won't change that until it makes sense.

(3) We will do the above (Roth IRA and cellphone) for the foreseeable future.

(4) My parents paid for my undergraduate education and gave me $2K as a wedding gift ten years later. That was it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Each of our 3 adult kids gets 32k a year (none are married yet). It is estate planning for us, but I am sure it is financial help for them. Once they get married and have kids we should be able to give gifts to everyone and max out the 529s.

About how much do you have in your estate? Just wondering at what point this level of gifting is typical? DH and I both come from modest means and didn't get any help from our families, but we are thinking about what we want to be able to provide for our kids in the future since we've done well. Do folks with $3m in investible assets do this, or is it more common at $5m, or $10m+?

With estates worth less than the lifetime gift allowance (23M for couples), there is no tax advantage of giving away money now. We are over that so we should save future taxes on our estate by making the gifts now. We are not so far above the limit that we need to worry about giving gifts against the lifetime limit. Funding 529s for a handful of grandkids will likely put us under the limit.

The tax free estate threshold is scheduled to come down to $6 million in 2026 (Inflation adjusted) so it is wise to plan around that. The threshold in DC is around $4 million and in MD $5 million so that’s another planning consideration.

Most people who are above $6M/person hopefully are planning for the "2025 Federal estate sunset". Lots of trusts will be established for living people to take full advantage of the $12.2M/person before it disappears. There are plenty of ways to do this and still have essentially full access to your $$$. Similarly, most people do this already to avoid State estate taxes, which are often much lower threshold.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Each of our 3 adult kids gets 32k a year (none are married yet). It is estate planning for us, but I am sure it is financial help for them. Once they get married and have kids we should be able to give gifts to everyone and max out the 529s.

About how much do you have in your estate? Just wondering at what point this level of gifting is typical? DH and I both come from modest means and didn't get any help from our families, but we are thinking about what we want to be able to provide for our kids in the future since we've done well. Do folks with $3m in investible assets do this, or is it more common at $5m, or $10m+?

With estates worth less than the lifetime gift allowance (23M for couples), there is no tax advantage of giving away money now. We are over that so we should save future taxes on our estate by making the gifts now. We are not so far above the limit that we need to worry about giving gifts against the lifetime limit. Funding 529s for a handful of grandkids will likely put us under the limit.

The tax free estate threshold is scheduled to come down to $6 million in 2026 (Inflation adjusted) so it is wise to plan around that. The threshold in DC is around $4 million and in MD $5 million so that’s another planning consideration.

Anonymous wrote:I am 40 and my parents gift me $25K per year and also pay for (most of) my groceries, my auto insurance, my cell phone, etc. I am still responsible and save a lot of my income. I want to get rich soon, damn it!

Seriously? This is just sad.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1, net worth higher than 10 mil
2. 6 kids aged 36-28
3.left home at 17 no assistance

Each got the same
We pay cell bill and car insurance til graduation from college once they got jobs cut off. Each got car like an old civic or rav 4 to use from sophomore year college til they buy their own after jobs we gained. All worked summers in HS and college . Undergrad we paid for most things they contributed with summer jobs and jobs during the year. Grad school they paid everything except we paid for health ins til age 26.

I grew up with nothing.
I know what it is like to go to bed hungry.

It is not lost on me that we are extremely lucky,

I don’t get this tough love approach. As long as they are on the right track why not help more?

are you insane, or just a spoiled teen?!? They gave their 6! kids plenty. Paid college, cell, insurance, car, most undergrad expenses, healthcare. That's millions of $ right there. What the h*ll else should they buy for the 6 kids?
Do the parents ever get to sit back and relax and say job well done after 30 years of childraising and expenses? or do you expect them to fund their adult offspring for life?

The point is if you are able to, why not?

Right? If you and your partner are worth millions and know you wont spend it all before you die, then why not give some to your family while you are alive, to watch them enjoy it? I get if a kid is not working hard and you don't want to encourage that by giving them $$. But we will happily help our kids with whatever they need, assuming they are employed and working hard. Why wait until I'm dead to transfer $$ to them?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1, net worth higher than 10 mil
2. 6 kids aged 36-28
3.left home at 17 no assistance

Each got the same
We pay cell bill and car insurance til graduation from college once they got jobs cut off. Each got car like an old civic or rav 4 to use from sophomore year college til they buy their own after jobs we gained. All worked summers in HS and college . Undergrad we paid for most things they contributed with summer jobs and jobs during the year. Grad school they paid everything except we paid for health ins til age 26.

I grew up with nothing.
I know what it is like to go to bed hungry.

It is not lost on me that we are extremely lucky,

I don’t get this tough love approach. As long as they are on the right track why not help more?

are you insane, or just a spoiled teen?!? They gave their 6! kids plenty. Paid college, cell, insurance, car, most undergrad expenses, healthcare. That's millions of $ right there. What the h*ll else should they buy for the 6 kids?
Do the parents ever get to sit back and relax and say job well done after 30 years of childraising and expenses? or do you expect them to fund their adult offspring for life?

The point is if you are able to, why not?

Easily $60,000 a year in medical expenses.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Each of our 3 adult kids gets 32k a year (none are married yet). It is estate planning for us, but I am sure it is financial help for them. Once they get married and have kids we should be able to give gifts to everyone and max out the 529s.

About how much do you have in your estate? Just wondering at what point this level of gifting is typical? DH and I both come from modest means and didn't get any help from our families, but we are thinking about what we want to be able to provide for our kids in the future since we've done well. Do folks with $3m in investible assets do this, or is it more common at $5m, or $10m+?

With estates worth less than the lifetime gift allowance (23M for couples), there is no tax advantage of giving away money now. We are over that so we should save future taxes on our estate by making the gifts now. We are not so far above the limit that we need to worry about giving gifts against the lifetime limit. Funding 529s for a handful of grandkids will likely put us under the limit.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Each of our 3 adult kids gets 32k a year (none are married yet). It is estate planning for us, but I am sure it is financial help for them. Once they get married and have kids we should be able to give gifts to everyone and max out the 529s.

About how much do you have in your estate? Just wondering at what point this level of gifting is typical? DH and I both come from modest means and didn't get any help from our families, but we are thinking about what we want to be able to provide for our kids in the future since we've done well. Do folks with $3m in investible assets do this, or is it more common at $5m, or $10m+?

Really depends upon what your monthly expenses are now and will be in retirement. How much do you need remaining to live off of?
If you have a large estate (over $12.2M per person which will sunset back to ~$6M/person in 2025/26), then it can be advantageous to gift the $32K/year to each kid and their spouses (if you include spouses you can gift $64K--$16K from each parent to each "kid". These yearly gifts do not count against the federal estate tax maximum. This also allows you to see your kids/spouses/family enjoy the $ while you are still alive.

Just a guess that this is more common at the $10M+ range

Anonymous wrote:Each of our 3 adult kids gets 32k a year (none are married yet). It is estate planning for us, but I am sure it is financial help for them. Once they get married and have kids we should be able to give gifts to everyone and max out the 529s.

About how much do you have in your estate? Just wondering at what point this level of gifting is typical? DH and I both come from modest means and didn't get any help from our families, but we are thinking about what we want to be able to provide for our kids in the future since we've done well. Do folks with $3m in investible assets do this, or is it more common at $5m, or $10m+?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1, net worth higher than 10 mil
2. 6 kids aged 36-28
3.left home at 17 no assistance

Each got the same
We pay cell bill and car insurance til graduation from college once they got jobs cut off. Each got car like an old civic or rav 4 to use from sophomore year college til they buy their own after jobs we gained. All worked summers in HS and college . Undergrad we paid for most things they contributed with summer jobs and jobs during the year. Grad school they paid everything except we paid for health ins til age 26.

I grew up with nothing.
I know what it is like to go to bed hungry.

It is not lost on me that we are extremely lucky,

I don’t get this tough love approach. As long as they are on the right track why not help more?

are you insane, or just a spoiled teen?!? They gave their 6! kids plenty. Paid college, cell, insurance, car, most undergrad expenses, healthcare. That's millions of $ right there. What the h*ll else should they buy for the 6 kids?
Do the parents ever get to sit back and relax and say job well done after 30 years of childraising and expenses? or do you expect them to fund their adult offspring for life?