I'm puzzled that OP didn't even think of just making sure gin and tonic was available for SIL. It's so odd.

Beer and wine contain sulfites that cause many people migraines.

Wine has too many sulfites for many people; I also prefer something like a gin and tonic.

Your SIL sounds awesome.

Why don’t you have gin and tonic at your family bbq

Anonymous wrote:What’s weird is that you ignore her preferences when you host her.

+1. What's up with that? Not cool, OP.

Anonymous wrote:What’s weird is that you ignore her preferences when you host her.

I think this as well. She must feel pretty left out in your family.

I’m a vegetarian and always bring a dish to family gatherings because nobody in my family is thoughtful enough to make sure there’s food for me at gatherings. This is the same deal.

Everyone else is drinking, and she doesn’t want to miss the relaxation, so she brought her own. Next time tell her you will have gin and tonic on hand.

Anonymous wrote:Goodness. I’d bring my own thermos of liquor if I had to a family obligation to hang out with you too, OP.

+1 Amen!

I respect her for having her own tastes

My in-laws only have cheap beer (Bud) at any occasion and I don't like it Normally I just drink water but if it's a nice day I have brought my own preferred drink. I always bring enough to share (margarita or something similar) but they never take me up on it. I am not an alcoholic. My aunt, on the other hand, brings a water bottle of booze to every occasion, including shopping at the mall, swimming at the lake (where we already have drinks), amusement park.... Weirdest of all is she never acts even buzzed. So we all know what that means.

Nope, this not an issue, nor is it a red flag.

Anonymous wrote:This is pretty much a consensus, isn't it?

Yup.

And another vote for wanting to hang out with the SIL!

Goodness. I’d bring my own thermos of liquor if I had to a family obligation to hang out with you too, OP.

MY BFF gets migraines from wine and beer and can only drink liquor - it has less impurities, apparently. I would not at all be surprised if your SIL really does get headaches from wine and beer. It would be nice if you provided a liquor option for her, so she wouldn't be forced to bring her own alcohol. You sound like a really mean hostess.

You see your SIL as an outsider and not as a family member at a casual family gathering. Got it.

I like my BIL so we keep his favorite hard cider stocked.