OP was an invited guest. It’s just plain rude to complain about who else was invited.

Every time I attend a child free wedding I deduct the childcare expenses from their gift. Last time they got a whole 40 bucks from me and my wife. Your free to say no kids and I’m free to give what I want.

Anonymous wrote:OP, I get it. With my kids now older, I'm glad the wedding phase is done for me. When you consider a "no kids" invitation, you must accept that the bride and groom don't want YOUR kids there. That's what they are saying. It's hard to stomach, but you can either accept the invitation and force yourself to not react negatively for any reason or decline the invitation.

This. I've been to a couple of no kid weddings and they both had a small number of kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I get it. With my kids now older, I'm glad the wedding phase is done for me. When you consider a "no kids" invitation, you must accept that the bride and groom don't want YOUR kids there. That's what they are saying. It's hard to stomach, but you can either accept the invitation and force yourself to not react negatively for any reason or decline the invitation.

I don’t understand why this is “hard to stomach”.

As the OP described, she went through the trouble of going to an out-of-town wedding and finding a babysitter for her kids thinking that it was a "no kids " wedding. It wasn't a "no kids wedding," just a wedding that her kids were not invited to.

Sounds like there were only a few kids.

OP said "tons."

We recently attended a wedding that said something to the effect of, "With the exception of the members of the wedding party, this is a 'no kids' wedding." A statement like that informed OP's expectations.

What, on the engraved invites? Come on. OP is basically pissed because she had to pay for a sitter. That is it.

Anonymous wrote:I’m having a wedding this fall and inviting a handful of nieces and nephews, but none age 5 and under, and none who are young adults I’ve not seen for over 5 years. It’s not my responsibility to host a family reunion.

THISSSSSS

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I get it. With my kids now older, I'm glad the wedding phase is done for me. When you consider a "no kids" invitation, you must accept that the bride and groom don't want YOUR kids there. That's what they are saying. It's hard to stomach, but you can either accept the invitation and force yourself to not react negatively for any reason or decline the invitation.

I don’t understand why this is “hard to stomach”.

As the OP described, she went through the trouble of going to an out-of-town wedding and finding a babysitter for her kids thinking that it was a "no kids " wedding. It wasn't a "no kids wedding," just a wedding that her kids were not invited to.

Sounds like there were only a few kids.

OP said "tons."

We recently attended a wedding that said something to the effect of, "With the exception of the members of the wedding party, this is a 'no kids' wedding." A statement like that informed OP's expectations.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I get it. With my kids now older, I'm glad the wedding phase is done for me. When you consider a "no kids" invitation, you must accept that the bride and groom don't want YOUR kids there. That's what they are saying. It's hard to stomach, but you can either accept the invitation and force yourself to not react negatively for any reason or decline the invitation.

I don’t understand why this is “hard to stomach”.

As the OP described, she went through the trouble of going to an out-of-town wedding and finding a babysitter for her kids thinking that it was a "no kids " wedding. It wasn't a "no kids wedding," just a wedding that her kids were not invited to.

Sounds like there were only a few kids.

This. OP has not mentioned who her kids are to the bride and groom. Do they even know her kids? Why is she put out that her distantly related or unknown to B&G kids weren't invited and ones close enough to them were? Can OP not see the difference? She found a sitter and was able to enjoy a night with her husband, that would be good enough for many.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I get it. With my kids now older, I'm glad the wedding phase is done for me. When you consider a "no kids" invitation, you must accept that the bride and groom don't want YOUR kids there. That's what they are saying. It's hard to stomach, but you can either accept the invitation and force yourself to not react negatively for any reason or decline the invitation.

I don’t understand why this is “hard to stomach”.

As the OP described, she went through the trouble of going to an out-of-town wedding and finding a babysitter for her kids thinking that it was a "no kids " wedding. It wasn't a "no kids wedding," just a wedding that her kids were not invited to.

Sounds like there were only a few kids.

The kids in the wedding party are the normal exception. That apparently goes for little dogs, too. Just attended a wedding where a pair of chihuahuas carried the rings. Doesn’t mean everyone else was welcome to bring their fur babies.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I get it. With my kids now older, I'm glad the wedding phase is done for me. When you consider a "no kids" invitation, you must accept that the bride and groom don't want YOUR kids there. That's what they are saying. It's hard to stomach, but you can either accept the invitation and force yourself to not react negatively for any reason or decline the invitation.

I don’t understand why this is “hard to stomach”.

As the OP described, she went through the trouble of going to an out-of-town wedding and finding a babysitter for her kids thinking that it was a "no kids " wedding. It wasn't a "no kids wedding," just a wedding that her kids were not invited to.

Non-walking babies don't count, because they don't have to have a meal or a chair-- they're basically cost-free. I wouldn't make a fuss over breastfed vs formula fed, but if a woman is nursing and she doesn't bring her baby, she might have to pump during the reception or risk leaking through her dress. And it's harder to find a sitter for a really little baby. So it's really normal to say "no kids" but "yes infants".

MOB here. Wedding this summer. We have invited just a few children — truly babies who are breastfed and parents who live in say, Seattle. And another baby, whose Dad is in the Army and will be deployed. So, Mom is coming with the baby. Cousins who live close by can get sitters.

We will do a (back in the corner) kids table for some boys 10-17, who are close to the groom. Seattle family can’t come. Not sure where we will seat the Army baby.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You thought wrong. No kids means no children of distant cousin, coworkers, neighbors, parents friends, etc. It's usually just a few kids the bride and groom specifically want such as their own, nieces, nephews etc. You don't sound that close to the B&G since you were surprised so obviously your kids weren't going to be included.

I actually thought that this was what having kids at your wedding meant.
I have never been to a wedding where the children of your coworkers and friends from law school are invited.

Having kids at your wedding means it' a free for all and all are welcome. Most people don't do that they just invite specific kids and tell everyone else "no kids" so they don't bring theirs. Why would I want to bring my kids to a wedding of people they don't know if they aren't wanted? I'm perfectly fine to leave my kids home unless specifically invited.

People are allowed to invite whatever subset of kids that they want. That being said, my kids don't have living grandparents or other relatives that can watch them so unless DH or I are comfortable going to the wedding stag, or the couple is someone we are extremely close to, we generally decline invites to no kids weddings. It is a big expense otherwise, and not in our budget.

Anonymous wrote:You thought wrong. No kids means no children of distant cousin, coworkers, neighbors, parents friends, etc. It's usually just a few kids the bride and groom specifically want such as their own, nieces, nephews etc. You don't sound that close to the B&G since you were surprised so obviously your kids weren't going to be included.

I actually thought that this was what having kids at your wedding meant.
I have never been to a wedding where the children of your coworkers and friends from law school are invited.