Does your nanny want to? Our nanny didn’t. She worked her 40-45 hours and wanted the weekends to be her own. In the four years she was with us, she watched the kids once on a weekend in an emergency.

You can say you were looking for a date night sitter and want to pay X amount in cash and you want to give her first refusal. Make it very clear she is not obligated but you wanted to know if she wanted extra cash.

We don't. 1.5 her rate is too much for a weekend outing. So we use neighborhood babysitter and the kids have fun with a new person.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly couldn’t go out if our nanny didn’t stay on Friday nights for our date night. I still don’t trust anyone but our nanny and my baby will freak out if she wakes up and there’s a stranger. Nanny can also handle the bath, bed routine and get the pumped milk bottle the perfect temperature. Just couldn’t happen with an occasional sitter for a child this young.

You convinced youself of this but it isn’t true. I found some very capable occasional sitters for my infant twins. You are lucky your nanny is willing to give uo her Friday nights.

No, honestly I just wouldn’t go out. Our nanny is the only person outside of DH and myself I trust with my baby just yet. Maybe later I will be comfortable but I am not now.

You might want to talk to a Dr. about your anxiety.

And there it is! The commonly parroted DCUM put down! We were all waiting for you!!

Ha ha! We all knew Polly would show up!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly couldn’t go out if our nanny didn’t stay on Friday nights for our date night. I still don’t trust anyone but our nanny and my baby will freak out if she wakes up and there’s a stranger. Nanny can also handle the bath, bed routine and get the pumped milk bottle the perfect temperature. Just couldn’t happen with an occasional sitter for a child this young.

You convinced youself of this but it isn’t true. I found some very capable occasional sitters for my infant twins. You are lucky your nanny is willing to give uo her Friday nights.

No, honestly I just wouldn’t go out. Our nanny is the only person outside of DH and myself I trust with my baby just yet. Maybe later I will be comfortable but I am not now.

You might want to talk to a Dr. about your anxiety.

And there it is! The commonly parroted DCUM put down! We were all waiting for you!!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly couldn’t go out if our nanny didn’t stay on Friday nights for our date night. I still don’t trust anyone but our nanny and my baby will freak out if she wakes up and there’s a stranger. Nanny can also handle the bath, bed routine and get the pumped milk bottle the perfect temperature. Just couldn’t happen with an occasional sitter for a child this young.

You convinced youself of this but it isn’t true. I found some very capable occasional sitters for my infant twins. You are lucky your nanny is willing to give uo her Friday nights.

No, honestly I just wouldn’t go out. Our nanny is the only person outside of DH and myself I trust with my baby just yet. Maybe later I will be comfortable but I am not now.

You might want to talk to a Dr. about your anxiety.

I can count on one hand the number of times we did this in 5 years.

I knew she'd agree no matter what, and I felt bad about her not having enough of a break.

My nanny was not 40 hrs, but she occasionally worked an extra 1/2 day for me . I asked her for her rate for extra hours and it was 1.5 her normal rate. I paid it in cash and didn’t report it.

Anonymous wrote:I never had less date night coverage than when I had a nanny; it kind of sucked. It was not worth the time and a half pay. I would get a separate babysitter for weekends

We didn’t have date night coverage with our full time nanny until she adjusted her schedule to include weekends. I don’t know why you think not having nanny work over 40 hour sucked.

I never had less date night coverage than when I had a nanny; it kind of sucked. It was not worth the time and a half pay. I would get a separate babysitter for weekends

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My employers give me the right of first refusal, which I absolutely appreciate, since I do sit on weekend evenings in general. They pay me in cash, which I suggested myself, since I really don’t need time and a half for a weekend care date in which I’ll see the kids awake for tops 2 hours or less. I’m aware this isn’t legal but not worried about it at all.

It's not illegal for you; it's illegal for them. For you it is all upside if later on you decided you should have been paid right. Then you get penalty pay too!

Sorry, not all upside, I forgot that your unreported pay won't count for your social security income later, so the downside to taking payment under the table is that you get less back in your retirement years. Of course, it is also a risk to you if you aren't paying taxes on it.

It's bad for the employee and the employer--I don't understand why people think labor laws don't apply to household workers.

The entitled parents posting on DCUM do not believe the laws of mere mortals do not apply to their privileged lives. I hope some nanny will report them, particularly the ones who refuse to pay overtime.

+1 It's amazing. I see these "super liberal" DC residents, and they question why their nannies need overtime and sick days. Decent work for people in the abstract but not for the people taking care of your kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My employers give me the right of first refusal, which I absolutely appreciate, since I do sit on weekend evenings in general. They pay me in cash, which I suggested myself, since I really don’t need time and a half for a weekend care date in which I’ll see the kids awake for tops 2 hours or less. I’m aware this isn’t legal but not worried about it at all.

It's not illegal for you; it's illegal for them. For you it is all upside if later on you decided you should have been paid right. Then you get penalty pay too!

Sorry, not all upside, I forgot that your unreported pay won't count for your social security income later, so the downside to taking payment under the table is that you get less back in your retirement years. Of course, it is also a risk to you if you aren't paying taxes on it.

It's bad for the employee and the employer--I don't understand why people think labor laws don't apply to household workers.

The entitled parents posting on DCUM do not believe the laws of mere mortals do not apply to their privileged lives. I hope some nanny will report them, particularly the ones who refuse to pay overtime.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My employers give me the right of first refusal, which I absolutely appreciate, since I do sit on weekend evenings in general. They pay me in cash, which I suggested myself, since I really don’t need time and a half for a weekend care date in which I’ll see the kids awake for tops 2 hours or less. I’m aware this isn’t legal but not worried about it at all.

It's not illegal for you; it's illegal for them. For you it is all upside if later on you decided you should have been paid right. Then you get penalty pay too!

Sorry, not all upside, I forgot that your unreported pay won't count for your social security income later, so the downside to taking payment under the table is that you get less back in your retirement years. Of course, it is also a risk to you if you aren't paying taxes on it.

It's bad for the employee and the employer--I don't understand why people think labor laws don't apply to household workers.

Anonymous wrote:We have a wonderful nanny 40 hours during the week. Now that Covid has lifted in our area, DH and I would love to resume date nights and the occasional weekend brunch.

How do you structure payment if we do this? Cash for babysitting or overtime and part of her biweekly check?

If you do this do you think it burns your nanny out?

I would be concerned about her having no life of her own. Yes, this will lead to burn out. Everyone needs a break from their job and babysitting weekends for you is not giving her a break. If I were your nanny I would be concerned about parents who don't want to spend weekends with their children and who prioritize date nights and Sunday brunches over their children. Maybe she has agreed to weekend sitting so the children are with someone who puts them first.

Yes, our nanny is our only babysitter. We don’t go out that much on weekends and never on weekday nights but when we do it’s so comforting to know they’re with nanny. They feel the same.