I'd leave my 10 yr old home alone if I knew neighbors would be home and knew our kid would be home alone... but I wouldn't leave both my kids home together and make the 10 year old responsible for the younger one.

Depends on the kid. Anyone going by a strictly age-based rule make me sad.

No. We occasionally leave my 13yr old in charge of the 8 yr old but that is to run a quick errand not to go out to dinner. We've thought about but he'd prob have more fun w a babysitter so we haven't. but in the pinch the 13yr old can call us if needed or know what to do in an emergency. I wouldn't leave a 10 yr old in charge of a 7 yr old. too young.

Anonymous wrote:I leave my 8yo twins alone. We give them a phone so that they can reach us. We are Europeans, however, and [/b]have a different outlook on kids‘ independence[b].

It’s easy to have that when most European countries are a lot safer than most parts of the US.

I leave my 8yo twins alone. We give them a phone so that they can reach us. We are Europeans, however, and have a different outlook on kids‘ independence.

I did! I agree with PPs who don’t like the idea of making the older kid babysit. But just because one kid is older doesn’t mean she’s babysitting. There was one time when our oldest did babysit but it’s only because she begged for it because she wanted to earn money.

But every time DH and I did it, the kids just watched YouTube or played Minecraft the whole time. So there wasn’t really any babysitting going on. A few times we got FaceTimes about arguments over who used what screen but usually there wasn’t actually a lot of interaction between the kids.

Also we only did it in the middle of the day or afternoon, and we are good friends with our neighbors and the kids could go to them in the case of a big emergency.

All that said, we didn’t do it often. Maybe four times. It’s not ideal, just an okay solution when you need to get out and a babysitter doesn’t work out.

Mine are 9 and 11 and I still wouldn't do this at night. A lunch date during the day, yes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. Don’t make your older kid babysit your younger kid. It causes resentment. You chose to have kid #2 so make arrangements for a sitter.

Disagree. I wouldn’t over use the babysitting for sure, and I have been known to pay my oldest extra allowance for babysitting especially on a weekend evening when she would be earning money elsewhere. But the occasional, 1-2 hour babysitting is just as acceptable as any other chore.

Fine but not all older kids want that. This sounds like the OP expects her older kid to babysit. Not okay.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would feel guilty going out for dinner and leaving my 9yo home alone so
I sound get a sitter to do something fun with her.

Weird.

why is this weird? She’s an only child… we would never go out for dinner and leave her just because we wanted to. We have lunch dates while she’s at school sometimes, a couple times a year she sleeps at Grandparents and we go out. But other than that we take her with us…. Leaving one alone is different that two though.

NP, and I'm not calling anyone weird. But my job doesn't allow for weekday lunch dates, and we don't have grandparents who can do sleepovers. I don't feel guilty leaving mine alone (or previously, with a sitter) so DH and I can spend an hour together. I think it's healthy for kids to know that their parents have an adult relationship and enjoy spending time together.

And hw is that precluded by getting a sitter for your elementary aged children?

I did not at this age.

No, 7 is still too young.

I only went out for dinner without them until when my kids were 13 and 16.

I think closer to 8 and 11 is better. More bc of fighting potential.

Maybe to quickly pick up dinner.