Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is why I hate asking people for favors. Absolutely hate it. Even the most well-intentioned people can mess it up.

That's why I hate doing favors, even with all my good intentions they will still find a way to make me feel bad that I did not do it up to their standards.

Showing up on time to pick up a child from school is a pretty low bar.

Actually, it is a pretty high bar. It sounds like the brother and SIL didn't really think this through and assigned the task to the BIL. There is no indication at all that this was something he wanted to do or volunteered to do.

I think the parents made a bad choice and hopefully they will make better choices in the future.

- You cannot imagine being late, as in no circumstance in which you were late , really???
- Did you remind him ahead of time , like 30-60 min ahead of time?
- Is he usually late for stuff?
- So don’t ask him to do this again, that is your solution, why is it necessary to post about it?
- Are you looking for suggestions on appropriate punishment for BIL?

Rough week for brothers-in-law on DCUM!

Anonymous wrote:You people SUCK. They asked BIL if he could pick up child from school and BIL agreed. If a grown adult has agreed to do something, then they should do it otherwise decline. You don't have to have children, much less be just a person that has attended any school in their lifetime to know school ends at a specific time. I can assume none of you on here has asked anyone for any help ever in your lifetime and never plan to, correct?

+1000

Anonymous wrote:BIL was supposed to pick up our child from school and was 30 min late. I can’t imagine being 5 min late, let alone 30 min late. DS was standing outside with a teacher for 25 min after the last kid was picked up.

BIL is 30 and single and thinks we are overreacting. I’m just so mad. Dh is mad.

What pisses me off is that BIL was working a half day and had 3 hours to pick up our child, which is why we asked him in the first place.

You act like you've never known any clueless 30yo single men. Lucky he got picked up at all

Anonymous wrote:I was once an hour late picking up my DD from elementary school. I took the train to get her like I did every day and the train got stuck underground. I couldn't even get off the train to get an Uber or walk or anything. I cried from the frustration and then acted like it wasn't a big deal to DD so she wouldn't get upset. Crap happens sometimes.

What does that have to do with the BIL?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is why I hate asking people for favors. Absolutely hate it. Even the most well-intentioned people can mess it up.

That's why I hate doing favors, even with all my good intentions they will still find a way to make me feel bad that I did not do it up to their standards.

Showing up on time to pick up a child from school is a pretty low bar.

Only when you are a SAHM. Some of us have to work.

Then behave like an adult and decline.

I was once an hour late picking up my DD from elementary school. I took the train to get her like I did every day and the train got stuck underground. I couldn't even get off the train to get an Uber or walk or anything. I cried from the frustration and then acted like it wasn't a big deal to DD so she wouldn't get upset. Crap happens sometimes.

Maybe the problem was lack of clear communication. If you knew he had 3 hours, hey pick him up early to get some ice cream together if you think that would be fun. But, no later than x time as staff leave at x time and it takes a few minutes to get parked, pick up his snuggly, or whatever.

He flaked out. Ok to be angry for a day then move on. Be glad kid is safe and don’t ask BIL again. Some people you can count on for stuff like this, and BIL isn’t one of them, now you know.

I am sure he didn't get the reality of what being late looks like when it has to do with school pick up.

It's nice that he did help you with this and that he wants to be a part of your kid's life. Is he a fun uncle that your child likes?

Ultimately the responsibility falls on you. You now know you need to rearrange your schedule to pick up your child on half days. Maybe next time you will pick up your child and drop them off to their uncle so you can go back to work on a half day.or maybe you will have to take that day off

I can't tell you how many times parents haven't shown up on time to the bus stop and I am the one calling people to pick up their kid.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lesson learned. He is unreliable for this task. Don’t ask him ever again.

And he will appreciate it.

Right. And I would also file it away for the time he asks me to do a favor.

Anonymous wrote:Lesson learned. He is unreliable for this task. Don’t ask him ever again.

Yup. Lesson learned.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is why I hate asking people for favors. Absolutely hate it. Even the most well-intentioned people can mess it up.

That's why I hate doing favors, even with all my good intentions they will still find a way to make me feel bad that I did not do it up to their standards.

Showing up on time to pick up a child from school is a pretty low bar.

Only when you are a SAHM. Some of us have to work.

If you can’t commit to being there on time, then you shouldn’t commit to doing the favor. Parents who work have to figure this out every day because showing up 30 minutes late for pick-up at school, daycare, etc. isn’t optional.

- WOHM who has never picked their kid up 30 min late

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is why I hate asking people for favors. Absolutely hate it. Even the most well-intentioned people can mess it up.

That's why I hate doing favors, even with all my good intentions they will still find a way to make me feel bad that I did not do it up to their standards.

Showing up on time to pick up a child from school is a pretty low bar.

Only when you are a SAHM. Some of us have to work.

But the BIL didn't. My brother (who has a school-age child!) is the same way. No sense of time or urgency.