Anonymous
04/11/2022 14:12
Subject: Bathing suits and hair for DD
Is there really a debate over whether your teenage daughter's pubic hair should be seen by random people?! I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!!
Anonymous
04/11/2022 14:05
Subject: Bathing suits and hair for DD
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Who cares what anybody does or does not “want to see” as long as private parts are covered (I’m assuming OP’s DD is wearing a standard-cut bikini bottom and just has some hair on upper thighs which is not a private part)? She doesn’t exist for the visual satisfaction of others and I think it’s really great that she realizes that at such a young age.
Also the “unaware of social norms” stuff seems out of place. Unless this kid lives a very sheltered existence I’m sure she is fully aware of the prevailing beauty standards.
OP back again. She is very aware of social norms and I think this is one of her ways of rebelling against them. It’s not really relevant but she also is currently identifying as part of the LBGTQ+ community. I’m trying hard not to put labels on her and just be a supportive parent. So much around us is so supportive and accepting of everything now. This is where some of her logic about men is coming from. And I don’t know, I’ve seen some pretty hairy men in speedos so I’m not sure the argument that they all shave applies. It hasn’t been in the US but it happens.
But I agree with many of you, the world is a harsh place and exposed pubic hair may be a little much even for accepting Nova.
To go by this forum, Nova is extremely unaccepting of bathing suit choice (use the search function to find any bikini thread) so do take it with a grain of salt. Not shaving but also wearing a bikini seems like a really harmless form of rebellion to me if she's fully aware of the social judgment it will produce. I'd totally let it go and hope she decides board shorts and a cute bikini top are a better androgynous look anyway.
Anonymous
04/11/2022 13:56
Subject: Bathing suits and hair for DD
Anonymous wrote:Who cares what anybody does or does not “want to see” as long as private parts are covered (I’m assuming OP’s DD is wearing a standard-cut bikini bottom and just has some hair on upper thighs which is not a private part)? She doesn’t exist for the visual satisfaction of others and I think it’s really great that she realizes that at such a young age.
Also the “unaware of social norms” stuff seems out of place. Unless this kid lives a very sheltered existence I’m sure she is fully aware of the prevailing beauty standards.
OP back again. She is very aware of social norms and I think this is one of her ways of rebelling against them. It’s not really relevant but she also is currently identifying as part of the LBGTQ+ community. I’m trying hard not to put labels on her and just be a supportive parent. So much around us is so supportive and accepting of everything now. This is where some of her logic about men is coming from. And I don’t know, I’ve seen some pretty hairy men in speedos so I’m not sure the argument that they all shave applies. It hasn’t been in the US but it happens.
But I agree with many of you, the world is a harsh place and exposed pubic hair may be a little much even for accepting Nova.
Anonymous
04/11/2022 13:54
Subject: Bathing suits and hair for DD
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Women, even those sporting underarm hair and unshaved legs, do not display their pubic hair. She doesn't have to shave it all off -- but it needs to be trimmed to stay inside the suit. At some point she has to understand that some things are considered nasty.
I truly don't understand why people don't want to shave their underarm hair, as it attracts odor. My teenage son shaves his -- not at my prompting -- because it makes him less 'funky'.
Why do you think it is nasty? I grew up in a Western European country and as a teenager no girl would shave her pubic area, nobody would even have thought of that, it just seems absurd. I only started shaving that area when I moved to the US, but I don't like it at all. So, honest question, why is it nasty?
How is it NOT gross to see a stranger’s pubic hair in public? This is not the cultural norm anywhere. Which is worse, a hair in your food from someone’s head or a pubic hair?
Anonymous
04/11/2022 13:52
Subject: Re:Bathing suits and hair for DD
Anonymous wrote:Your daughter’s logic makes no sense and you need to correct her. When men wear the bottoms she wants to wear (Speedos) they shave their pubic hair. There is no double standard here. Pubic hair is part of your private parts and should not be shown in public.
+1 This us what I tell my daughter. It’s basically pubic hair, and it private. Nobody wants to see it.
She’ll also be a social pariah, but that’s beside the point.
Anonymous
04/11/2022 13:21
Subject: Bathing suits and hair for DD
Anonymous wrote:+1 I’m old and this has been the slang for as long as I can remember.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:No way I’d let my 13 year old daughter or son in public with their pubes showing. Disturbing that you’d even consider this normal.
DP
So it this the slang for pubic hair? I've only heard that term used for the actual pubic area (peni$, etc)
I've never heard it as slang for anything but the hair.
+1. I'm 62.
Anonymous
04/11/2022 13:10
Subject: Bathing suits and hair for DD
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Women, even those sporting underarm hair and unshaved legs, do not display their pubic hair. She doesn't have to shave it all off -- but it needs to be trimmed to stay inside the suit. At some point she has to understand that some things are considered nasty.
I truly don't understand why people don't want to shave their underarm hair, as it attracts odor. My teenage son shaves his -- not at my prompting -- because it makes him less 'funky'.
Why do you think it is nasty? I grew up in a Western European country and as a teenager no girl would shave her pubic area, nobody would even have thought of that, it just seems absurd. I only started shaving that area when I moved to the US, but I don't like it at all. So, honest question, why is it nasty?
Women walk around in Europe with pubic hair sticking out of the bathing suits? I've been all over and never seen it. No one said she had to take all the hair off, but it needs to be inside the suit. And her DD is in the US which even if your oh-so-refined sensibilities like to see pubic hair sticking out, is not the cultural norm here and gets you made fun of and talked about as nasty.
Anonymous
04/11/2022 13:02
Subject: Bathing suits and hair for DD
Anonymous wrote:Women, even those sporting underarm hair and unshaved legs, do not display their pubic hair. She doesn't have to shave it all off -- but it needs to be trimmed to stay inside the suit. At some point she has to understand that some things are considered nasty.
I truly don't understand why people don't want to shave their underarm hair, as it attracts odor. My teenage son shaves his -- not at my prompting -- because it makes him less 'funky'.
Why do you think it is nasty? I grew up in a Western European country and as a teenager no girl would shave her pubic area, nobody would even have thought of that, it just seems absurd. I only started shaving that area when I moved to the US, but I don't like it at all. So, honest question, why is it nasty?
Anonymous
04/11/2022 12:41
Subject: Bathing suits and hair for DD
Women, even those sporting underarm hair and unshaved legs, do not display their pubic hair. She doesn't have to shave it all off -- but it needs to be trimmed to stay inside the suit. At some point she has to understand that some things are considered nasty.
I truly don't understand why people don't want to shave their underarm hair, as it attracts odor. My teenage son shaves his -- not at my prompting -- because it makes him less 'funky'.
I truly don't understand why people don't want to shave their underarm hair, as it attracts odor. My teenage son shaves his -- not at my prompting -- because it makes him less 'funky'.
Anonymous
04/11/2022 12:32
Subject: Re:Bathing suits and hair for DD
Your daughter’s logic makes no sense and you need to correct her. When men wear the bottoms she wants to wear (Speedos) they shave their pubic hair. There is no double standard here. Pubic hair is part of your private parts and should not be shown in public.
Anonymous
04/11/2022 11:53
Subject: Bathing suits and hair for DD
Who cares what anybody does or does not “want to see” as long as private parts are covered (I’m assuming OP’s DD is wearing a standard-cut bikini bottom and just has some hair on upper thighs which is not a private part)? She doesn’t exist for the visual satisfaction of others and I think it’s really great that she realizes that at such a young age.
Also the “unaware of social norms” stuff seems out of place. Unless this kid lives a very sheltered existence I’m sure she is fully aware of the prevailing beauty standards.
Also the “unaware of social norms” stuff seems out of place. Unless this kid lives a very sheltered existence I’m sure she is fully aware of the prevailing beauty standards.
Anonymous
04/11/2022 11:47
Subject: Bathing suits and hair for DD
I’d like to see swim shorts more normalized for women in general. It’s lame that the standard swim attire for women is essentially underwear and requires (often painful and/or inconvenient) hair removal. Men can just pull on their trunks and go.
Anonymous
04/11/2022 11:31
Subject: Re:Bathing suits and hair for DD
No one’s pubic hair should be showing in public. Men who wear speedos shave it.
If your daughter doesn’t want to shave, fine. She needs to wear shorts or a skirt.
No one wants to see her muff.
If your daughter doesn’t want to shave, fine. She needs to wear shorts or a skirt.
No one wants to see her muff.
Anonymous
04/11/2022 11:15
Subject: Bathing suits and hair for DD
+1 I’m old and this has been the slang for as long as I can remember.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:No way I’d let my 13 year old daughter or son in public with their pubes showing. Disturbing that you’d even consider this normal.
DP
So it this the slang for pubic hair? I've only heard that term used for the actual pubic area (peni$, etc)
I've never heard it as slang for anything but the hair.
Anonymous
04/11/2022 11:10
Subject: Bathing suits and hair for DD
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:No way I’d let my 13 year old daughter or son in public with their pubes showing. Disturbing that you’d even consider this normal.
DP
So it this the slang for pubic hair? I've only heard that term used for the actual pubic area (peni$, etc)
I've never heard it as slang for anything but the hair.