I would prioritize the actual job search. It can take a long time to find the first post-biglaw opportunity. You also might be surprised how close to family you want to be after kids. I would start looking into opportunities close to the grandparents as opposed to just picking a city.

^^ to *commuting* (Metro and toll roads) to the cost of extracurricular activities for your kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, it sounds like you’ve done a good amount of research on housing costs, but less so on career paths for lawyers in your specific situation — i.e., lawyers wanting to move, whether in the shorter or longer term, from a big-firm investigations practice to either a government job or something else. You might want to post on the jobs forum to ask how someone like you or your spouse would find an exit path from a big firm. That could help you assess whether DC would actually offer better professional options than staying in Philadelphia.

You should also consider that many firm and agency jobs in DC involve a lot of travel. If you are trying to move here to avoid regular travel to NYC, be certain that you're not trading for another job with frequent travel.

On the positive side, the DC area is very friendly and you would find it easy to put down roots, especially since you are a young family. Many people are transplants. As others have said, the schools aren't as good as they used to be, but that might be true everywhere.

Good to know re: travel expectations at agency jobs. I hadn't realized that. I've seen people mention that school performance is trending downward both here and in other threads in this forum. What are the main issues - overcrowding, teacher turnover, other COVID-related issues? Are there specific schools in the closer-in MD/VA suburbs or in NW DC that should be avoided? (I'm sure I can find long discussions of these issues elsewhere on the site, but any info is helpful in thinking about our options.) I'm not sure how the schools in the DC area compare to the schools on the Main Line or in South Jersey, but we think we'd be happy with the latter if we stay in the area. Private schools in DC seem out of reach unless one of us stays in big law long term - and even then, we don't want to have to stretch to come up with tuition. Admissions also seem super competitive.

OP, I think that it's worth giving a little more detail into what you are looking for in terms of schools. For better or worse, DC does attracts a certain type of person for whom anything but "the best" is not good enough, and that person is unusually prevalent on this website. Ergo, the schools are always said to be on the down slide, there are no affordable living options even for two-lawyer couples, etc. The reality is that DC has a higher concentration of households like yours (two well-educated high earners) than just about any place in the country, and there are plenty of ways to make it work depending on what you prioritize.

If I were in your shoes, I would make the move to DC, but actually settle in the city in a neighborhood more like the one you're used to for a few years. You can definitely do public elementary school in a nice neighborhood with a pretty decent rowhouse in your price range. I'd look at places like Capitol Hill, Glover Park, or Mt. Pleasant that are reasonably quiet and family friendly; there will be lots of households similar to yours in all of these places. Depending on how you feel about the schools and the neighborhood at that point, you can still make your way to the suburbs, or you can consider charter or private schools, or you may even decide that you are satisfied with the public school options. There is quite a bit of variation in the quality of the DC public high schools, and there are also things like magnet schools to consider, so if you're serious about that possibly, I would spend some time learning about the in-bound options and the lottery system before you buy into a neighborhood.

I think the idea of move to the DC area but also jump to the suburbs at the same time is honestly just making your decision much harder than it needs to be. From how you are describing your situation, I think you will like it here a lot.

The DMV is Expensive with a capital E, OP! Be prepared for sticker shock with everything from the amount of house you can get for $1.2M (and the public schools that come with it) to car taxes to HOA fee$ (many neighborhoods here are HOAs) to community (Metro and toll roads) the cost of extracurricular activities for your kids.

Even a five-day, time-time camp at the local rec center might be $500-$600. For five days. For one kid.

It is NOT cheap to live here, and you could feel poor all the time. Many people here live quiet lives of desperation, their credit card debt is exploding. There is a very strong keep-up-with-the-Joneses mentality in the DMV and people love to flaunt their stuff in your face. Many people here quietly feel broke and have imposters syndrome. You've been forewarned.

Anonymous wrote:We regretted moving to the DMV. We really disliked how insecure and tightly wound people were, how they acted like middle schoolers who judged people for how they look, and were status obsessed. We disliked how hard people pushed their kids and were amused by them then wondering why so many kids had anxiety. We left after two years.

DP. I agree. And the closer in suburbs, it’s very “clicky”. Also, OP, are you Caucasian or of s diverse ethnicity? Many of the folks living in the near DC suburbs tend to stray away from diverse families and it can be very uncomfortable for a non-Caucasian family. Especially in parts of Arlington. So if you want to be around friendly diverse people, some parts of nova aren’t the greatest.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, it sounds like you’ve done a good amount of research on housing costs, but less so on career paths for lawyers in your specific situation — i.e., lawyers wanting to move, whether in the shorter or longer term, from a big-firm investigations practice to either a government job or something else. You might want to post on the jobs forum to ask how someone like you or your spouse would find an exit path from a big firm. That could help you assess whether DC would actually offer better professional options than staying in Philadelphia.

You should also consider that many firm and agency jobs in DC involve a lot of travel. If you are trying to move here to avoid regular travel to NYC, be certain that you're not trading for another job with frequent travel.

On the positive side, the DC area is very friendly and you would find it easy to put down roots, especially since you are a young family. Many people are transplants. As others have said, the schools aren't as good as they used to be, but that might be true everywhere.

Did you say DC is very friendly?

DP and despite its reputation, I do think the DC area is relatively friendly, at least compared to NYC and Philly (and Boston). At least, pockets of it are. Maybe the more expensive areas are less friendly, but I tend to think they're still welcoming to the people who can afford them. It's not like you have to have grown up here for people to be friendly, which is the case in many parts of the country. People sort of expect you to be from somewhere else.

Anonymous wrote:We did the opposite. We left DC for the Philadelphia suburbs. More specifically, Haddonfield. Taxes are high, but the school system is excellent. We have a beautiful home in an idyllic town. Lots of community groups, especially for young families, where we made many of our friends. We are constantly saying how thankful we are that we made the move here.

OP - Really interesting to hear this perspective, thanks. We originally thought we'd probably head to the Main Line once we leave the city, but I've been more and more interested in Haddonfield ever since we've started thinking more seriously about where we want to move next. I actually haven't been over the bridge to check it out, but we should do that soon. (I'm more familiar with Cherry Hill, but that's too much sprawl for me.) Haddonfield seems awesome, and the schools seem excellent. Comparing homes in Haddonfield to homes in the DC area is specifically what inspired me to post this thread! I think we could have a great life there. We just don't know what we'd do for work!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, it sounds like you’ve done a good amount of research on housing costs, but less so on career paths for lawyers in your specific situation — i.e., lawyers wanting to move, whether in the shorter or longer term, from a big-firm investigations practice to either a government job or something else. You might want to post on the jobs forum to ask how someone like you or your spouse would find an exit path from a big firm. That could help you assess whether DC would actually offer better professional options than staying in Philadelphia.

You should also consider that many firm and agency jobs in DC involve a lot of travel. If you are trying to move here to avoid regular travel to NYC, be certain that you're not trading for another job with frequent travel.

On the positive side, the DC area is very friendly and you would find it easy to put down roots, especially since you are a young family. Many people are transplants. As others have said, the schools aren't as good as they used to be, but that might be true everywhere.

I strongly disagree that agency jobs in DC require much travel.

We regretted moving to the DMV. We really disliked how insecure and tightly wound people were, how they acted like middle schoolers who judged people for how they look, and were status obsessed. We disliked how hard people pushed their kids and were amused by them then wondering why so many kids had anxiety. We left after two years.

We did the opposite. We left DC for the Philadelphia suburbs. More specifically, Haddonfield. Taxes are high, but the school system is excellent. We have a beautiful home in an idyllic town. Lots of community groups, especially for young families, where we made many of our friends. We are constantly saying how thankful we are that we made the move here.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, it sounds like you’ve done a good amount of research on housing costs, but less so on career paths for lawyers in your specific situation — i.e., lawyers wanting to move, whether in the shorter or longer term, from a big-firm investigations practice to either a government job or something else. You might want to post on the jobs forum to ask how someone like you or your spouse would find an exit path from a big firm. That could help you assess whether DC would actually offer better professional options than staying in Philadelphia.

You should also consider that many firm and agency jobs in DC involve a lot of travel. If you are trying to move here to avoid regular travel to NYC, be certain that you're not trading for another job with frequent travel.

On the positive side, the DC area is very friendly and you would find it easy to put down roots, especially since you are a young family. Many people are transplants. As others have said, the schools aren't as good as they used to be, but that might be true everywhere.

Good to know re: travel expectations at agency jobs. I hadn't realized that. I've seen people mention that school performance is trending downward both here and in other threads in this forum. What are the main issues - overcrowding, teacher turnover, other COVID-related issues? Are there specific schools in the closer-in MD/VA suburbs or in NW DC that should be avoided? (I'm sure I can find long discussions of these issues elsewhere on the site, but any info is helpful in thinking about our options.) I'm not sure how the schools in the DC area compare to the schools on the Main Line or in South Jersey, but we think we'd be happy with the latter if we stay in the area. Private schools in DC seem out of reach unless one of us stays in big law long term - and even then, we don't want to have to stretch to come up with tuition. Admissions also seem super competitive.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, it sounds like you’ve done a good amount of research on housing costs, but less so on career paths for lawyers in your specific situation — i.e., lawyers wanting to move, whether in the shorter or longer term, from a big-firm investigations practice to either a government job or something else. You might want to post on the jobs forum to ask how someone like you or your spouse would find an exit path from a big firm. That could help you assess whether DC would actually offer better professional options than staying in Philadelphia.

You should also consider that many firm and agency jobs in DC involve a lot of travel. If you are trying to move here to avoid regular travel to NYC, be certain that you're not trading for another job with frequent travel.

On the positive side, the DC area is very friendly and you would find it easy to put down roots, especially since you are a young family. Many people are transplants. As others have said, the schools aren't as good as they used to be, but that might be true everywhere.

Did you say DC is very friendly?

Anonymous wrote:OP, it sounds like you’ve done a good amount of research on housing costs, but less so on career paths for lawyers in your specific situation — i.e., lawyers wanting to move, whether in the shorter or longer term, from a big-firm investigations practice to either a government job or something else. You might want to post on the jobs forum to ask how someone like you or your spouse would find an exit path from a big firm. That could help you assess whether DC would actually offer better professional options than staying in Philadelphia.

You should also consider that many firm and agency jobs in DC involve a lot of travel. If you are trying to move here to avoid regular travel to NYC, be certain that you're not trading for another job with frequent travel.

On the positive side, the DC area is very friendly and you would find it easy to put down roots, especially since you are a young family. Many people are transplants. As others have said, the schools aren't as good as they used to be, but that might be true everywhere.

I don’t think the OP is really reading and considering the comments on here.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do not do it! 8 years later and we still hate the DMV area. Remote work is about to open up soon here (already put in my application) and we will be out so fast and back to the West Coast. Will never look back, wouldn't even visit this place.

Sounds like OP has a small child and doesn’t want a remote job that requires travel to another city. My take is she wants a fin regulator job or the like and these are mostly on the east coast.

She is in Philly so everything is relative.

OP - This is exactly right. We want to stay on the East Coast. While I'm sure we'd love many things about the West Coast, it's too far from family. We have no desire to move to Boston, and the whole reason we moved to Philly in the first place was because we didn't want to raise a family in New York. Now we're feeling a bit limited in Philly, and tbh we've also found it hard to "break in." We have a few friends here, but it's definitely a different vibe than NYC in that most of the people we meet seem to have deep roots in the region. We're certainly open to putting in the effort to really make Philly home though. DC is the logical alternative to staying here given its location and the fact that there are plenty of jobs in our field there.