Anonymous wrote:I don't understand nicknames but also have never had one and neither have my parents. Why give your child a name then call them something else?

Historically, resistance to colonization.

Doesn't apply to everyone, but it's one reason.

In some cultures it's also to ward off the evil eye, etc.

-PP with the Filipino husband

So, this is funny. I have a lot of experience with this, OP, so maybe I can help.

I was born Sandra Fern Smith (not really). My mother's name is also Sandra, so they literally always planned to call me by my middle name-- it's a Southern thing, I'm the oldest. I am Fern. Literally no one who knows me for more than 5 minutes calls me Sandra-- except doctors I know I'll see infrequently and don't bother to correct. It's a little annoying but totally fine. Never ever wanted to go by Sandra, no teacher forced it on me, thankfully. Funny when someone who only has my official name tries to call me "Sandy" or something, though. Like... you're giving me a nickname for a name I don't even use. The overfamiliarity is just so egregious it's funny.

Since Fern doesn't usually lend itself to nicknames (my real name even less so than Fern), just... everyone has always called me simply Fern and always will. I love my mom, though, and would never change my first name. I usually sign things S. Fern Smith.

DH is Filipino. Almost all Filipinos have a pre-assigned nickname and much of the time, with family, you don't even know, or at least never use, their official government name. The funny thing is that he was named after a great-grandfather, and so was given that great-grandfather's first name AND inherited his nickname, which, unlike most Filipino nicknames, is not an obvious nickname. It's just a whole 'nother name. Nice and confusing lol.

As with mine, the name he goes by doesn't lend itself to too many nicknames, especially to non-Filipinos. His name is like Manuel Jose Mendoza Garcia but he goes by Miguel. Occasionally car salesman or w/e will call him "Manny" and it totally doesn't register lol. Even his work email is always MiguelGarcia@BigCorp.com Most people don't even know Miguel has nothing to do with his official name. When he posted his father's obituary to Facebook, some of the people who didn't know him as well only recognized the last name and asked how he was related (because it mentioned him as a son, but said "Manuel Jose Mendoza Garcia," not Miguel.

Good times!

So of course, we gave our kid a name with a pre-determined nickname, and it's great. She's only in ES, so maybe things will change. But it works out because her first name is very very ethnically specific. It's not unpronounceable IMO, but non-Filipinos don't usually get it right. Her nickname is pronounced correctly 100% of the time and is another nickname that sounds like/is a given name for some people.

AND her given name is not something even Filipinos would have a traditional nickname for, because it's the name of a city. (This is so specific. If anyone knows me at all, they now know I read DCUM. Hi, friends!) Anyway, it's been given as a name EVER in the Philippines, but it's rare there, too.

So no one is going to start calling her her given first name more than occasionally, and those people are family or at least other Filipinos. It's much harder than her nickname and doesn't lend itself to any other "easier" variation. And yet, she loves her first name, at least for now.

That was a lot of TL;DRing, but bottom line:

DH and I both come from cultures with pre-assigned nicknames, and we had pre-assigned nicknames that stuck, even though explaining them is occasionally a hassle. We also honor our given names and would never change them. We did the same for our kid. Our nicknames/alternate names don't lend themselves to their own nicknames. And none of our given names is easier or simpler than our given names, so that might be another reason this has all worked out.

I'd say the only differences with the kid are that her nickname is sort of a shortened version of her given name, and that we (and a few others) actually do sometimes call her her given name affectionately.

I don't understand nicknames but also have never had one and neither have my parents. Why give your child a name then call them something else?

I guess I don't really get the junior/III nicknames. If it's so important to use the family name, why would you then call them something completely unrelated? My uncle is John after my deceased grandfather. My cousin is called John 3. His son goes by his middle name. Sonny and Junior seem like they'd be nicknames just family would use, but then again I've never actually met anyone who uses nicknames like that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter is Veronica and her nickname is Vera (VEH-RA) When she was a baby, Vera seemed to fit her better, but in preschool she wanted to be Veronica. That held until 1st grade when there was a Victoria in her class and they were always getting them confused. Then she went back to Vera and that stuck. She’s in 5th grade and is still going by Vera. Not sure what she’ll do in the future!

I can't figure out how to say this. Not Veer-a? Because VEH-RA seems impossible for me to pronounce.

The Ver sounds like Bear but with a V

It sounds like the Ve in the beginning of Veronica. Just not Veeera.

Like so the Ver rhymes with sir? The way I hear people say Veronica, the er rhymes with sir.

OMG! It’s not that complicated! It’s pronounced like Aloe Vera. I’ve never heard anyone pronounce Veronica with a Vir sound.

FFS that's why I said the Bear thing. Then she corrected me and I got confused.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter is Veronica and her nickname is Vera (VEH-RA) When she was a baby, Vera seemed to fit her better, but in preschool she wanted to be Veronica. That held until 1st grade when there was a Victoria in her class and they were always getting them confused. Then she went back to Vera and that stuck. She’s in 5th grade and is still going by Vera. Not sure what she’ll do in the future!

I can't figure out how to say this. Not Veer-a? Because VEH-RA seems impossible for me to pronounce.

The Ver sounds like Bear but with a V

It sounds like the Ve in the beginning of Veronica. Just not Veeera.

Like so the Ver rhymes with sir? The way I hear people say Veronica, the er rhymes with sir.

OMG! It’s not that complicated! It’s pronounced like Aloe Vera. I’ve never heard anyone pronounce Veronica with a Vir sound.

Uh... PP I am a NP and was not confused, but you have to understand that many people pronounce it Aloe VEERA, so you haven't helped.

Listen, folks, say the name "Sarah." Okay, now substitute a V sound for the S sound.

I’m Vera’s mom, this is exactly it! Thank you PP!

lol It’s never been this hard to explain in real life

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op again- how about something like Junior or Trey or Sonny? Anyone have luck with those?

Generally I think these names are widely accepted when the kids are little and then it ends in high school or college. Basically it works when they’re little kids but all the guys I knew who were Jr or Trey switched to their real name in college. I think it feels too cutesy to have people you meet as an adult call you a name that’s basically a diminutive of your dad. These became family nicknames only.

Hmmm... I've met adult Treys and Tripps. Maybe it's more acceptable in the South.

... What does Tripp mean?

Same thing as Trey/Tre. The third. As in John Smith, III.

Think Tripp/Trip as in Triple.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter is Veronica and her nickname is Vera (VEH-RA) When she was a baby, Vera seemed to fit her better, but in preschool she wanted to be Veronica. That held until 1st grade when there was a Victoria in her class and they were always getting them confused. Then she went back to Vera and that stuck. She’s in 5th grade and is still going by Vera. Not sure what she’ll do in the future!

I can't figure out how to say this. Not Veer-a? Because VEH-RA seems impossible for me to pronounce.

The Ver sounds like Bear but with a V

It sounds like the Ve in the beginning of Veronica. Just not Veeera.

Like so the Ver rhymes with sir? The way I hear people say Veronica, the er rhymes with sir.

OMG! It’s not that complicated! It’s pronounced like Aloe Vera. I’ve never heard anyone pronounce Veronica with a Vir sound.

Uh... PP I am a NP and was not confused, but you have to understand that many people pronounce it Aloe VEERA, so you haven't helped.

Listen, folks, say the name "Sarah." Okay, now substitute a V sound for the S sound.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter is Veronica and her nickname is Vera (VEH-RA) When she was a baby, Vera seemed to fit her better, but in preschool she wanted to be Veronica. That held until 1st grade when there was a Victoria in her class and they were always getting them confused. Then she went back to Vera and that stuck. She’s in 5th grade and is still going by Vera. Not sure what she’ll do in the future!

I can't figure out how to say this. Not Veer-a? Because VEH-RA seems impossible for me to pronounce.

The Ver sounds like Bear but with a V

It sounds like the Ve in the beginning of Veronica. Just not Veeera.

Like so the Ver rhymes with sir? The way I hear people say Veronica, the er rhymes with sir.

OMG! It’s not that complicated! It’s pronounced like Aloe Vera. I’ve never heard anyone pronounce Veronica with a Vir sound.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter is Veronica and her nickname is Vera (VEH-RA) When she was a baby, Vera seemed to fit her better, but in preschool she wanted to be Veronica. That held until 1st grade when there was a Victoria in her class and they were always getting them confused. Then she went back to Vera and that stuck. She’s in 5th grade and is still going by Vera. Not sure what she’ll do in the future!

I can't figure out how to say this. Not Veer-a? Because VEH-RA seems impossible for me to pronounce.

The Ver sounds like Bear but with a V

It sounds like the Ve in the beginning of Veronica. Just not Veeera.

Like so the Ver rhymes with sir? The way I hear people say Veronica, the er rhymes with sir.

Lol, this is a mess. Maybe Veronica's mom isn't American?

I too pronounce Veronica with the first syllable rhyming with Sir.

Pp seems to pronounce it with the first syllable sounding like Bear, which I've never really heard before.

I did meet a Russian woman named Vera, rhymes with Bear-uh.

The only Veronica I know goes by Ronni. Her sisters are Alexandra/Alex and Frances/Frankie.

But when I posted the Bear thing, she corrected me.

I had this whole comment typed up but I just remembered that this fall I met a boy named Fox and one named Spike. Almost anything else is fine in comparison.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter is Veronica and her nickname is Vera (VEH-RA) When she was a baby, Vera seemed to fit her better, but in preschool she wanted to be Veronica. That held until 1st grade when there was a Victoria in her class and they were always getting them confused. Then she went back to Vera and that stuck. She’s in 5th grade and is still going by Vera. Not sure what she’ll do in the future!

I can't figure out how to say this. Not Veer-a? Because VEH-RA seems impossible for me to pronounce.

The Ver sounds like Bear but with a V

It sounds like the Ve in the beginning of Veronica. Just not Veeera.

Like so the Ver rhymes with sir? The way I hear people say Veronica, the er rhymes with sir.

Lol, this is a mess. Maybe Veronica's mom isn't American?

I too pronounce Veronica with the first syllable rhyming with Sir.

Pp seems to pronounce it with the first syllable sounding like Bear, which I've never really heard before.

I did meet a Russian woman named Vera, rhymes with Bear-uh.

The only Veronica I know goes by Ronni. Her sisters are Alexandra/Alex and Frances/Frankie.

Anonymous wrote:My son is still too young to really tell (under 2) because we aren’t in school yet but we introduce him as his nickname and every single person in his life knows him by that. I don’t see how preschool or school will be any different? I don’t think he will even know his full name before preschool because no one has ever called him it? I don’t know why there’s always haters on these threads. I grew up with plenty of Katherines called Katie, plenty of boys who went by middle names because first name was dad’s name (including my own brother), etc, and people with nicknames completely unrelated to their actual name like Trey or Tripp for the 3rd, and none of this was ever a problem?

Well, as you know, once he goes to school it will be different because his full name will be on the rosters. Some teachers will forget to call him the nickname, so kids who have never met him will call him by the same name they hear the teacher calling him, and he will get tired of correcting people and decide he loves his full name. That's why my son is Joe at home and Joseph to everyone who met him after 1st grade. And Joey to a handful of folks who decided that's the appropriate nickname regardless of our preference.

It's not a problem for us. If it's a problem for your child he'll just have to be more vocal about his preference.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter is Veronica and her nickname is Vera (VEH-RA) When she was a baby, Vera seemed to fit her better, but in preschool she wanted to be Veronica. That held until 1st grade when there was a Victoria in her class and they were always getting them confused. Then she went back to Vera and that stuck. She’s in 5th grade and is still going by Vera. Not sure what she’ll do in the future!

I can't figure out how to say this. Not Veer-a? Because VEH-RA seems impossible for me to pronounce.

The Ver sounds like Bear but with a V

It sounds like the Ve in the beginning of Veronica. Just not Veeera.

Like so the Ver rhymes with sir? The way I hear people say Veronica, the er rhymes with sir.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter is Veronica and her nickname is Vera (VEH-RA) When she was a baby, Vera seemed to fit her better, but in preschool she wanted to be Veronica. That held until 1st grade when there was a Victoria in her class and they were always getting them confused. Then she went back to Vera and that stuck. She’s in 5th grade and is still going by Vera. Not sure what she’ll do in the future!

I can't figure out how to say this. Not Veer-a? Because VEH-RA seems impossible for me to pronounce.

The Ver sounds like Bear but with a V

It sounds like the Ve in the beginning of Veronica. Just not Veeera.