My husband suffers from depression and his pride has gotten in the way of getting help. So, as a result I have had a very difficult marriage going on 24 years. My strength comes from the Lord. If I did not have a relationship with Jesus, my personal Lord and Savior I would not have survived the marriage. Marriage does not just happen it takes effort. It takes forgiveness, kindness, selflessness, patience, gentleness, and lots and lots of prayer. Day in and day out He gets me through it. I know, that our life here is a test and a journey and is very very short. Our permanent home for all those who believe is with God in heaven where there is no suffering, no crying, no pain. I look forward to that daily. youversion.com

Anonymous wrote:We've gone through some shit. But the worst was probably infidelity. Mine.

Describe.

Anonymous wrote:The loss of all passion. Realizing in your late 40s you will never have passionate sex again because your spouse just doesn't like sex anymore. Hard to deal with, there is no good solution for this.

You don’t know about never. Things change sometimes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Year 20. Infidelity. I never saw it coming. Completely blindsided.

He met a woman on AM that you have trashed here for two years?

Ah. No. Work colleague.

How long/how serious/what happened next?

The biggest challenge in our marriage of *almost* 20 years is mis-matched temperaments. He is completely joyless, anxious and clench. Never an emotion expressed - occasionally irritation but that's about it. It kills me slowly.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Teenagers. Even the good ones make dumb decisions.

Trying to reconnect when the kids leave for college and one of us (me) has been a SAHM for so long

Why does the SAHM make a difference? SAHMs are always saying on here how busy they are with their volunteering and hobbies.

Because my identity was wrapped up in being a mom. All of my volunteer activities revolved around PTA, soccer, field hockey and dance things my kids were involved in. For over 22 years. Once the kids were gone, I had to rediscover who *I* was, outside of Larla and Larlo's mom.

Hmmm. So was mine, but I also always had a full-time job. I think empty nest is a big change for everyone, but you really need to start transitioning about 4-5 years before and really work on the marital relationship too. My spouse and I went into counseling for the first time and really deepened our relationship and made lots of couples and individual plans mapped out.

We've gone through some shit. But the worst was probably infidelity. Mine.

Spouse engaging in duty sex with you but doesnt care for it themself, and it shows. Try being very sexually active and living like that for 10 years.