This brings up the eternal question of why is the woman responsible for birth control? Once a couple decides they want no more children can't the man get a vasectomy?

You don’t get to call yourself “super careful,” you had unprotected sex and literally the natural consequence occurred.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I were in your shoes, I would get an abortion. 1. Way too old to have a baby, in my eyes. 2. The odds of the baby coming out jacked up is high and honestly, I wouldn’t want to risk it. 3. Abortions are so simple. Best of luck!

Your wording of this post (as well as the sentiment behind it) is abhorrent.

This from someone who will not be responsible for a child who may very well have special needs. You would be the first to say. "what did you expect having a baby at your age!"

Anonymous wrote:I got pregnant accidentally. DH and I are usually
very careful and have been married for 20 years. We had one planned baby who is now a teen and the one time in 13 years we did not use protection I fell pregnant. I am so sad! I didn’t plan this and have no desire whats so ever to have a baby. I know I will love the baby once he/she arrives but I feel so old. I can’t get over the fact that I am to old to have a baby. I am so embarrassed. I haven’t told anymore as yet. I refuse to think about it let alone talk about it. Just want to vent.

I don't want to be Debbie Downer and many will tell you that you aren't too old but think of how your life is going to change and not necessarily for the better.

Just think about having a newborn at age 46 and what happens when you get down to the business of every day living, and this if your baby has no problems, because the risk of chromosomal abnormality increases with maternal age.

Anonymous wrote:You probably won’t be pregnant for long. PP is right that miscarriage odds are high. If you don’t want to be pregnant, termination is very easy before 6 weeks.

The first sentence is ghastly.

Anonymous wrote:You probably won’t be pregnant for long. PP is right that miscarriage odds are high. If you don’t want to be pregnant, termination is very easy before 6 weeks.

I don’t even think you can terminate before an ultrasound, and a doctor will usually need you to wait until week 5 or 6 to rule out ectopic etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How far along are you, OP? From experience, I can state that miscarriage rates are much higher for older moms. My unexpected later in life ended in miscarriage. I was relieved. Wish you all the best

I’m not far along at all. I’m 4 weeks in.

Odds of MC are very high. BTDT.

Well, I too waited and hoped for a MC, went to get a CVS at 10.5 weeks, which was good and clear. I was almost 45.having an abortion at 12 weeks is way way more traumatic than at 4/6/8 weeks, provided that’s what OP decides.

I am newly pregnant at 42, will be 43 at birth. I have one going to college next year and my youngest is 8. I have been struggling and want to keep the baby but it’s definitely overwhelming. I don’t think it’s old for people starting their families but it feels old when having older kids. I am kind of embarrassed and don’t plan on broadcasting it on social media or reaching out to tell anyone. I dread telling my boss. And not sure what to do about work because I stayed home when my kids were little and only went back in the last few years. So I hear what you’re saying on many levels. I don’t have any advice.

I admit I thought maybe I’d miscarry and be relieved but things seem fine so far and I’m experiencing symptoms so I guess I’m really pregnant.

I just got pregnant and the baby will be born at age 44. But my other kids are not that much older.

Anonymous wrote:My mom had me at 45. I came out fine. There's a quarter century between me and the oldest sibling.

The only difference between my parents and my school friend's parents was that my parents were a bit more tired due to being older -- haha. But my parents were much wiser, calmer and surer of themselves as parents and as people than my friend's parents because my parents had so much more life experience. They knew how to pick their battles very, very well. When a teacher heard from my mom, well, it must be damn important.

Mom died when I was 40. That's the downside for both parent and child. But there are never any guarantees in life, are there? I'm glad I had her as a mom. Dad, too.

I'm sorry for the loss of your mom. Hopefully your sibling is a comfort and it seems that OP has another child so this baby would have someone to turn to as well.

True, you will be the Jedi mom

My mom had me at 45. I came out fine. There's a quarter century between me and the oldest sibling.

The only difference between my parents and my school friend's parents was that my parents were a bit more tired due to being older -- haha. But my parents were much wiser, calmer and surer of themselves as parents and as people than my friend's parents because my parents had so much more life experience. They knew how to pick their battles very, very well. When a teacher heard from my mom, well, it must be damn important.

Mom died when I was 40. That's the downside for both parent and child. But there are never any guarantees in life, are there? I'm glad I had her as a mom. Dad, too.

I had my only child at 45 and I certainly don’t feel too old. For those saying you’ll be in your sixties when the kids goes to college, well you’ll be that age anyways. But my child was desperately wanted. If you’re on the fence you should consider your options.

Anonymous wrote:If I were in your shoes, I would get an abortion. 1. Way too old to have a baby, in my eyes. 2. The odds of the baby coming out jacked up is high and honestly, I wouldn’t want to risk it. 3. Abortions are so simple. Best of luck!

Your wording of this post (as well as the sentiment behind it) is abhorrent.

My best friend in high school was number 12 I think with a mom who was in her late 40s. Her parents rocked! They let us do whatever we wanted. Maybe they were too tired to micromanage us lol. She turned out fine!