Anonymous wrote:If OP was fat, the post would have been titled “dating advice for fat girls”. But it is far more likely that OP has a facial feature that is considered unappealing to most, and it is not possible or feasible to have it fixed.

OP already knows the truth, though. Despite what tv might suggest, people date and marry in their general attractiveness range. If OP is a 3, she needs to be looking for guys that are 2-4s. Stay off of Tinder and use the other sites, and be proactive on reaching out.

NP and not an "ugly" girl. But curious what's wrong with Tinder? It seems guys (and women, too) are usually on multiple dating apps: Tinder, Bumble, etc. Whichever app you choose, you run into the same guys.

Be GGG

OP here, I am NOT fat although I can lose 5 lbs.

If OP was fat, the post would have been titled “dating advice for fat girls”. But it is far more likely that OP has a facial feature that is considered unappealing to most, and it is not possible or feasible to have it fixed.

OP already knows the truth, though. Despite what tv might suggest, people date and marry in their general attractiveness range. If OP is a 3, she needs to be looking for guys that are 2-4s. Stay off of Tinder and use the other sites, and be proactive on reaching out.

Anonymous wrote:If she weighed less, it would not have been an issue for me.

Are you an undermasculine computer/engineer wannabe who loves porn? OP, adjust your own weight for you. There are definitely shallow guys who will hit on anything plus-sized. They look at porn for visual stimulation.

Man here. If you're overweight, try to lose it. If you can't, then wear it well. There are "plus size" models who look really good due to the right clothes and styling.

Went on a date last week with a woman who was overweight. Here photos looked decent, but I guess she gained the Covid-15 in the last year. Nice person, but just wasn't the attraction there. If she weighed less, it would not have been an issue for me.

Anonymous wrote:Hire a personal trainer, get fit, and tell men where to line up. It really is that easy.

+1

Anonymous wrote:OP, there are a ton of ugly men. You’ll be fine.

+1

OP, we are all more critical of our looks than what other people see. Seriously, anyone can improve their look.

Hire a personal trainer, get fit, and tell men where to line up. It really is that easy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What dating advice would you give a single woman who is not conventionally attractive?

When I get no messages on my online dating profiles.

Be thin. Be nice. Bjs.

Correct answer. Thread over.

Its the Three B’s!

Attractiveness is a marathon not a sprint. I know women who looked their best in their twenties (most) thirties (some) forties and fifties (fewer, but wow). Aging and the life we lead affects us all differently.

I would give you the same advice I’d give a “conventionally attractive” person: get to know yourself really, really well. Spend time getting to know yourself and separating out what you like vs. what society says you like. Take advantage of that knowledge and your resources to prioritize what makes you happy and content. For the sake of good health (not thinness) find an exercise you like and enjoy doing and do that a few times a week. Cultivate relationships that make you happy, prune toxic people from your life, and give to causes that matter to you.

You will have a better relationship with another person if you can approach a relationship with honesty and say “I like baking really complicated pastry on the weekend and I collect antique Disney figurines” than trying to convince yourself that you like hiking (if you don’t) or that you should do a crazy workout scheme to fit into a size two. You may meet someone who loves to eat pastry and collects vintage action figures who would never go for someone who wanted to hike every weekend.

Anonymous wrote:Don’t date online. It’s so creepy in the first place. Get out and live your life.

Have you dated in the second decade of the 21st century?

All these people talking about weight, lol, so many fat women who know how look put together and have good personalities get all kinds of men. I have always been thin and when I had self-esteem issues (which seeped into how I dressed), I got way less attention from men than my overweight friends. I think a so much of what turned men off was self-consciousness about my appearance!

Anyway OP there are good articles and TikToks even about how to make your online dating profile look better. It’s hard though. Also be willing to settle on superficial things like looks and salary (not work ethic) and things like that.

Wear makeup and show more of your body in pics online.

Men say they hate makeup, but don't realize many women are wearing makeup.