Anonymous
Post 09/28/2021 15:18     Subject: has your dd ever had to miss school because of her period?
Anonymous wrote:DD is 16 and has had her period for 2.5 years. She has always had a hard time with it. In the last year, her cramps are worse. She also gets sharp abdominal pains and feels very nauseous in the first two days.

Two weeks ago, I took her to the pediatrician and explained all of this. Ped asked a lot of questions and concluded that this was normal, though unfortunate. The ped did not think we needed further evaluation.

So this morning, she was having these symptoms and they were a little worse than usual. And I strongly encouraged her to go to school based on the pediatrician's conclusions. I basically told her that some women have really tough periods and we have to learn to push through them. She was able to eat a few bites of cereal in order to take two Advil.

She called me husband just now to pick her up since he WFH.

Has anyone's DD been through this and is this normal? Or should I push on the pediatrician to get a referral or some tests?

The reason I encouraged her to go to school is that she is the kind of kid who needs to be pushed sometimes. She has a tendency to give up easily and has a lazy streak. It can be hard to know what to do sometimes in a situation like this with her. I certainly don't want to push her if she is really ill.



This has happened multiple times for my DD and, honestly, it did affect her grades b/c if she missed even one day, she would miss a test or information and b/c she is shy, she wouldn't make it up or catch up.

So, we got her on some low-dose BCP and it has been a HUGE improvement. (It also made a big difference in her acne, bonus!). Seriously, though, she had a really hard time and it was a problem. It doesn't have to be that way.
Anonymous
Post 09/28/2021 14:44     Subject: has your dd ever had to miss school because of her period?
2 Teens-18 and 16. They have both missed school due to cramps/nausea, etc.

One is on Nexplanon due to cramps and some ovarian cysts. The other one is managing with OTC meds-she doesn't want BC or the implant. She has other health issues with mulitple meds, so not pusing the BC track.
Anonymous
Post 09/28/2021 14:34     Subject: Re:has your dd ever had to miss school because of her period?
Op, here. thanks for the advice. I will definitely get some Aleve. Does anyone have an app to recommend so that we can start tracking the symptoms.
Anonymous
Post 09/28/2021 14:05     Subject: Re:has your dd ever had to miss school because of her period?
Anonymous wrote:Thanks for the advice. I will take her to a gyn and we will start taking Advil in advance. She plays a team sport, so gets her exercise in. It was a female pediatrician and she is an adolescent medicine specialist, so I suspect she sees menstrual complaints often.


Yeah if Advil is your choice then you have to take it before the pain starts instead of trying to chase the pain. Personally I never thought it worked that well. Alleve in a prescription dose worked far better. Maybe you can discuss medication options that might work better.
Anonymous
Post 09/28/2021 14:00     Subject: Re:has your dd ever had to miss school because of her period?
Yes, my daughters both were to the point they were missing a half day of school each month. I finally took them both to the OB/GYN, who helped them somewhat, but it was still touch and go for a couple of years. Best of luck to you.
Anonymous
Post 09/28/2021 13:57     Subject: has your dd ever had to miss school because of her period?
Agree with everyone else that says take your DD to a gyn.

In HS (and still) Advil doesn't do anything at all to help. But... if I take 2 Aleve the very second I start feeling even a tinge of cramps, and then take it consistently every 6 hours or so, I can manage to get through the days.
Anonymous
Post 09/28/2021 13:48     Subject: has your dd ever had to miss school because of her period?
I have had cramps so bad I had to pull my car over to throw up. My sister used to have to take opiate pain meds for hers. Hell yes we missed school.
Anonymous
Post 09/28/2021 13:41     Subject: has your dd ever had to miss school because of her period?
Totally normal for teens to have terrible cramps. I remember crying in bed with a heating pad and missing school. Things that helped were Aleve and birth control.
Anonymous
Post 09/28/2021 13:01     Subject: has your dd ever had to miss school because of her period?
Anonymous wrote:Do people using BC just skip their periods?


My DD does. She doesn't take the placebo. Hasn't had a period in months.
Anonymous
Post 09/28/2021 12:59     Subject: has your dd ever had to miss school because of her period?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Do people using BC just skip their periods?


No

However, some women skip the inactive pills in their monthly pack and are able to skip their periods.

There are also specific no period birth control pills like Lybrel.




Just to clarify, I know how the pill generally works and I know it can ease cramps but I was curious if your kid went on BC to ease symptoms did they (or did they consider) skipping the inactive pills.
Anonymous
Post 09/28/2021 12:49     Subject: Re:has your dd ever had to miss school because of her period?
I had to be picked up several as a teen for this. Terrible cramps, dizziness, nausea that made it impossible to do anything, and it wasn’t well managed by Advil. It lasted into college until I started taking birth control pills.
Anonymous
Post 09/28/2021 12:42     Subject: has your dd ever had to miss school because of her period?
Take your daughter to a gyn. I suffered through this in hs and same thing, ped said it was normal so I thought it was. Only years later did I find out I had horrible endometriosis. No amount of Advil could touch it. BCp gave me my life back. I was also given a prescription of some udon the cramps. I used it for a few months until the bcp helped. Only later when I had kids did I realize that those horrible cramps were as bad as labor. When she says it’s bad, it likely is
Anonymous
Post 09/28/2021 12:38     Subject: has your dd ever had to miss school because of her period?
Anonymous wrote:Jesus, the number of women on here willing to say a young woman should just deal with it and that she's probably just being 'lazy' is disgusting, and also very sad. The PP that said if men had to deal with this our view would be very, very different is spot on. And female doctors can be just as, if not more, dismissive than male doctors because many of them also buy into this worldview that women are just lazy whiners who should be pushing silently and cheerfully through pain to get along in society without causing anyone any inconvenience. They see women who admit they're in pain as letting down the cause or something - my sister went through this sort of thing for years before finally finding a gynecologist who would help her. And when she did, her life became so much better.

Yes, OP, take her to another doctor, one who will actually listen to your daughter and help her. Your pediatrician is a jerk and probably incapable of treating anyone who's gone through puberty. Get her a non-ped doctor. And yes, let her stay home from school if she's in terrible pain. Do you really think she's getting anything out of being forced to sit in a chair in a class and run around the halls on a bell schedule when she's physically miserable? It's ok to follow your instincts as a parent and support your child even if some random authority figure brushes her off. And it's ok to miss school sometimes.


Thank you very much for writing this.
Anonymous
Post 09/28/2021 12:34     Subject: has your dd ever had to miss school because of her period?
I was like this when I was a teen. I had to have my dad come pick me up a couple times.

Since the pediatrician isn't helping, I would suggest taking her to an ob/gyn.
Anonymous
Post 09/28/2021 12:20     Subject: has your dd ever had to miss school because of her period?
+1,000 to getting it addressed.

Yes, it's possible that she's malingering. But it's possible that (1) she could develop a better toolkit for managing her periods; (2) she could benefit from BCP; (3) she has endo; or (4) other. In all of these cases, getting to a better solution sooner is advantageous. There's no case where "wait and see" is better. Until you get an appt, she should absolutely keep a diary of symptoms, level of pain, steps taken, etc.

I have found out after the fact that young women in my office routinely were either coming in but unable to function or were missing work 2 days a month--basically a 10% loss of work for something that likely can and should be addressed not just better function now, but potentially to protect future functionality and fertility.