Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The best answer is to find another place to play.

Best answer is actually talk to the coach. Find out the players shortcomings and see if there is a developmental plan to address the players needs.

If, after talking to the coach, there is no real plan to address the shortcomings or the coach is evasive about the players needs then absolutely find another team.

If you leave without knowing what your players limitations are, in the eyes of a coach, you will do the kid a great disservice. If you don't know or are unwilling to address the shortcomings they will not go away on their own through the magic of club practice and the same cycle will repeat itself.

Not really. Plenty of options out there. Just find a better environment. I did it for my son, and it was the best decision I made for him. He got more confident, he got better and got recruited at the University he wanted to.

And that worked out for you. I didn't say you have to stay at the club.

Exactly what is the downside to getting the current coaches perspective? Why not have that dialog? The coach could be wrong or off the mark but there is every chance that the coach is right. Change clubs if you want but your kid will be in a much better spot if you have an idea of what your players strengths and weaknesses are in the long run.

But I get it, people want to be outraged and blame the coach, travel soccer and just about anything but themselves. A coach may not be the best fit for your kid but that does not make them a bad coach or even wrong. It doesn't have to be personal. So, if you want the best for your kid then the best thing is to never waste an opportunity to get feedback or insight regarding your kids strengths and weaknesses. If you do that you will have more information to help guide your next decision. I really don't see what is so controversial about talking to an adult like an adult.

That's been talked about multiple times on this thread. And actually several posters told people to take their "loser" children to karate and other sports. Every parent I ever knew of that tried got nothing but hostility, no matter how they tried. But if it scratches an itch for someone, sure. Talk to the coach. However, clubs are much more likely to recruit over top of a bottom player than to develop one. So a fresh look and set of eyes is the approach that I have seen work out on a pretty consistent basis.

Again, taking it personally. If you want to leave then leave but you should leave armed with as much information as possible.

If you go into the conversation defensive and confrontational you will get a a defensive coach. If you go into the conversation like an adult you will have an adult conversation. But the only way that works is if you honestly just want the information without trying to change the coaches mind. You wouldn't go to your kids teacher in school and try and convince the teacher that your kid is great at math when she is consistently getting C's. But you would go in with a different perspective of your kid and try and have a dialog of why your kid is getting C's when your experience at home is that she understands the homework but chokes on tests?

The point of the conversation is to hopefully make your kid a better soccer player not to convince the other of anything. To many parents talk to coaches in transnational terms:
My kid should get more minutes
My kid should be Center Mid


If the conversation is started with:
How can my kid earn more minutes?
My kid would like to play Center mid, what does she need to improve to earn that position?

There's nothing personal about it. It's a service they are selling, and a service I'm buying.

Well, all you've actually bought is 50% playing time the rest you're wasting due to pride and arrogance.

That's fine. If a coach isn't interested in a player, the player should move on from the coach. It's better to go where a coach believes in the player and will develop him.

And that is where the disconnect is. This is why so many people get frustrated with travel sports. You said it isn't personal and then you say this, "If a coach isn't interested in a player, the player should move on from the coach" I don't know but that sounds kind of personal to me. And it is based on what exactly? Playing time? Again, playing time is earned and is relational to the other players on the team. Again, there is no deeper questioning what are the players shortcomings only that the coach isn't "interested" in the player.

And yes, you can go to another team where the "coach believes" in him, i.e. plays him even though the team may be weaker relative to the previous team.

My kids have changed clubs and the flaws that they had at the previous club didn't disappear because the new coach "believed" in them.

The problem is there is no mutual ground with parents like you because in your mind you have "paid for a service" and you did not signup and pay $3000 for disappointment. And if there is disappointment well that is the coaches fault not mine or my kids.

You are overflowing this. Read through the thread. When you understand it, then this can become a meaningful discussion.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The best answer is to find another place to play.

Best answer is actually talk to the coach. Find out the players shortcomings and see if there is a developmental plan to address the players needs.

If, after talking to the coach, there is no real plan to address the shortcomings or the coach is evasive about the players needs then absolutely find another team.

If you leave without knowing what your players limitations are, in the eyes of a coach, you will do the kid a great disservice. If you don't know or are unwilling to address the shortcomings they will not go away on their own through the magic of club practice and the same cycle will repeat itself.

Not really. Plenty of options out there. Just find a better environment. I did it for my son, and it was the best decision I made for him. He got more confident, he got better and got recruited at the University he wanted to.

And that worked out for you. I didn't say you have to stay at the club.

Exactly what is the downside to getting the current coaches perspective? Why not have that dialog? The coach could be wrong or off the mark but there is every chance that the coach is right. Change clubs if you want but your kid will be in a much better spot if you have an idea of what your players strengths and weaknesses are in the long run.

But I get it, people want to be outraged and blame the coach, travel soccer and just about anything but themselves. A coach may not be the best fit for your kid but that does not make them a bad coach or even wrong. It doesn't have to be personal. So, if you want the best for your kid then the best thing is to never waste an opportunity to get feedback or insight regarding your kids strengths and weaknesses. If you do that you will have more information to help guide your next decision. I really don't see what is so controversial about talking to an adult like an adult.

That's been talked about multiple times on this thread. And actually several posters told people to take their "loser" children to karate and other sports. Every parent I ever knew of that tried got nothing but hostility, no matter how they tried. But if it scratches an itch for someone, sure. Talk to the coach. However, clubs are much more likely to recruit over top of a bottom player than to develop one. So a fresh look and set of eyes is the approach that I have seen work out on a pretty consistent basis.

Again, taking it personally. If you want to leave then leave but you should leave armed with as much information as possible.

If you go into the conversation defensive and confrontational you will get a a defensive coach. If you go into the conversation like an adult you will have an adult conversation. But the only way that works is if you honestly just want the information without trying to change the coaches mind. You wouldn't go to your kids teacher in school and try and convince the teacher that your kid is great at math when she is consistently getting C's. But you would go in with a different perspective of your kid and try and have a dialog of why your kid is getting C's when your experience at home is that she understands the homework but chokes on tests?

The point of the conversation is to hopefully make your kid a better soccer player not to convince the other of anything. To many parents talk to coaches in transnational terms:
My kid should get more minutes
My kid should be Center Mid


If the conversation is started with:
How can my kid earn more minutes?
My kid would like to play Center mid, what does she need to improve to earn that position?

There's nothing personal about it. It's a service they are selling, and a service I'm buying.

Well, all you've actually bought is 50% playing time the rest you're wasting due to pride and arrogance.

That's fine. If a coach isn't interested in a player, the player should move on from the coach. It's better to go where a coach believes in the player and will develop him.

And that is where the disconnect is. This is why so many people get frustrated with travel sports. You said it isn't personal and then you say this, "If a coach isn't interested in a player, the player should move on from the coach" I don't know but that sounds kind of personal to me. And it is based on what exactly? Playing time? Again, playing time is earned and is relational to the other players on the team. Again, there is no deeper questioning what are the players shortcomings only that the coach isn't "interested" in the player.

And yes, you can go to another team where the "coach believes" in him, i.e. plays him even though the team may be weaker relative to the previous team.

My kids have changed clubs and the flaws that they had at the previous club didn't disappear because the new coach "believed" in them.

The problem is there is no mutual ground with parents like you because in your mind you have "paid for a service" and you did not signup and pay $3000 for disappointment. And if there is disappointment well that is the coaches fault not mine or my kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The best answer is to find another place to play.

Best answer is actually talk to the coach. Find out the players shortcomings and see if there is a developmental plan to address the players needs.

If, after talking to the coach, there is no real plan to address the shortcomings or the coach is evasive about the players needs then absolutely find another team.

If you leave without knowing what your players limitations are, in the eyes of a coach, you will do the kid a great disservice. If you don't know or are unwilling to address the shortcomings they will not go away on their own through the magic of club practice and the same cycle will repeat itself.

Not really. Plenty of options out there. Just find a better environment. I did it for my son, and it was the best decision I made for him. He got more confident, he got better and got recruited at the University he wanted to.

And that worked out for you. I didn't say you have to stay at the club.

Exactly what is the downside to getting the current coaches perspective? Why not have that dialog? The coach could be wrong or off the mark but there is every chance that the coach is right. Change clubs if you want but your kid will be in a much better spot if you have an idea of what your players strengths and weaknesses are in the long run.

But I get it, people want to be outraged and blame the coach, travel soccer and just about anything but themselves. A coach may not be the best fit for your kid but that does not make them a bad coach or even wrong. It doesn't have to be personal. So, if you want the best for your kid then the best thing is to never waste an opportunity to get feedback or insight regarding your kids strengths and weaknesses. If you do that you will have more information to help guide your next decision. I really don't see what is so controversial about talking to an adult like an adult.

That's been talked about multiple times on this thread. And actually several posters told people to take their "loser" children to karate and other sports. Every parent I ever knew of that tried got nothing but hostility, no matter how they tried. But if it scratches an itch for someone, sure. Talk to the coach. However, clubs are much more likely to recruit over top of a bottom player than to develop one. So a fresh look and set of eyes is the approach that I have seen work out on a pretty consistent basis.

Again, taking it personally. If you want to leave then leave but you should leave armed with as much information as possible.

If you go into the conversation defensive and confrontational you will get a a defensive coach. If you go into the conversation like an adult you will have an adult conversation. But the only way that works is if you honestly just want the information without trying to change the coaches mind. You wouldn't go to your kids teacher in school and try and convince the teacher that your kid is great at math when she is consistently getting C's. But you would go in with a different perspective of your kid and try and have a dialog of why your kid is getting C's when your experience at home is that she understands the homework but chokes on tests?

The point of the conversation is to hopefully make your kid a better soccer player not to convince the other of anything. To many parents talk to coaches in transnational terms:
My kid should get more minutes
My kid should be Center Mid


If the conversation is started with:
How can my kid earn more minutes?
My kid would like to play Center mid, what does she need to improve to earn that position?

There's nothing personal about it. It's a service they are selling, and a service I'm buying.

Well, all you've actually bought is 50% playing time the rest you're wasting due to pride and arrogance.

That's fine. If a coach isn't interested in a player, the player should move on from the coach. It's better to go where a coach believes in the player and will develop him.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The best answer is to find another place to play.

Best answer is actually talk to the coach. Find out the players shortcomings and see if there is a developmental plan to address the players needs.

If, after talking to the coach, there is no real plan to address the shortcomings or the coach is evasive about the players needs then absolutely find another team.

If you leave without knowing what your players limitations are, in the eyes of a coach, you will do the kid a great disservice. If you don't know or are unwilling to address the shortcomings they will not go away on their own through the magic of club practice and the same cycle will repeat itself.

Not really. Plenty of options out there. Just find a better environment. I did it for my son, and it was the best decision I made for him. He got more confident, he got better and got recruited at the University he wanted to.

And that worked out for you. I didn't say you have to stay at the club.

Exactly what is the downside to getting the current coaches perspective? Why not have that dialog? The coach could be wrong or off the mark but there is every chance that the coach is right. Change clubs if you want but your kid will be in a much better spot if you have an idea of what your players strengths and weaknesses are in the long run.

But I get it, people want to be outraged and blame the coach, travel soccer and just about anything but themselves. A coach may not be the best fit for your kid but that does not make them a bad coach or even wrong. It doesn't have to be personal. So, if you want the best for your kid then the best thing is to never waste an opportunity to get feedback or insight regarding your kids strengths and weaknesses. If you do that you will have more information to help guide your next decision. I really don't see what is so controversial about talking to an adult like an adult.

That's been talked about multiple times on this thread. And actually several posters told people to take their "loser" children to karate and other sports. Every parent I ever knew of that tried got nothing but hostility, no matter how they tried. But if it scratches an itch for someone, sure. Talk to the coach. However, clubs are much more likely to recruit over top of a bottom player than to develop one. So a fresh look and set of eyes is the approach that I have seen work out on a pretty consistent basis.

Again, taking it personally. If you want to leave then leave but you should leave armed with as much information as possible.

If you go into the conversation defensive and confrontational you will get a a defensive coach. If you go into the conversation like an adult you will have an adult conversation. But the only way that works is if you honestly just want the information without trying to change the coaches mind. You wouldn't go to your kids teacher in school and try and convince the teacher that your kid is great at math when she is consistently getting C's. But you would go in with a different perspective of your kid and try and have a dialog of why your kid is getting C's when your experience at home is that she understands the homework but chokes on tests?

The point of the conversation is to hopefully make your kid a better soccer player not to convince the other of anything. To many parents talk to coaches in transnational terms:
My kid should get more minutes
My kid should be Center Mid


If the conversation is started with:
How can my kid earn more minutes?
My kid would like to play Center mid, what does she need to improve to earn that position?

There's nothing personal about it. It's a service they are selling, and a service I'm buying.

Well, all you've actually bought is 50% playing time the rest you're wasting due to pride and arrogance.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The best answer is to find another place to play.

Best answer is actually talk to the coach. Find out the players shortcomings and see if there is a developmental plan to address the players needs.

If, after talking to the coach, there is no real plan to address the shortcomings or the coach is evasive about the players needs then absolutely find another team.

If you leave without knowing what your players limitations are, in the eyes of a coach, you will do the kid a great disservice. If you don't know or are unwilling to address the shortcomings they will not go away on their own through the magic of club practice and the same cycle will repeat itself.

Not really. Plenty of options out there. Just find a better environment. I did it for my son, and it was the best decision I made for him. He got more confident, he got better and got recruited at the University he wanted to.

And that worked out for you. I didn't say you have to stay at the club.

Exactly what is the downside to getting the current coaches perspective? Why not have that dialog? The coach could be wrong or off the mark but there is every chance that the coach is right. Change clubs if you want but your kid will be in a much better spot if you have an idea of what your players strengths and weaknesses are in the long run.

But I get it, people want to be outraged and blame the coach, travel soccer and just about anything but themselves. A coach may not be the best fit for your kid but that does not make them a bad coach or even wrong. It doesn't have to be personal. So, if you want the best for your kid then the best thing is to never waste an opportunity to get feedback or insight regarding your kids strengths and weaknesses. If you do that you will have more information to help guide your next decision. I really don't see what is so controversial about talking to an adult like an adult.

That's been talked about multiple times on this thread. And actually several posters told people to take their "loser" children to karate and other sports. Every parent I ever knew of that tried got nothing but hostility, no matter how they tried. But if it scratches an itch for someone, sure. Talk to the coach. However, clubs are much more likely to recruit over top of a bottom player than to develop one. So a fresh look and set of eyes is the approach that I have seen work out on a pretty consistent basis.

Again, taking it personally. If you want to leave then leave but you should leave armed with as much information as possible.

If you go into the conversation defensive and confrontational you will get a a defensive coach. If you go into the conversation like an adult you will have an adult conversation. But the only way that works is if you honestly just want the information without trying to change the coaches mind. You wouldn't go to your kids teacher in school and try and convince the teacher that your kid is great at math when she is consistently getting C's. But you would go in with a different perspective of your kid and try and have a dialog of why your kid is getting C's when your experience at home is that she understands the homework but chokes on tests?

The point of the conversation is to hopefully make your kid a better soccer player not to convince the other of anything. To many parents talk to coaches in transnational terms:
My kid should get more minutes
My kid should be Center Mid


If the conversation is started with:
How can my kid earn more minutes?
My kid would like to play Center mid, what does she need to improve to earn that position?

There's nothing personal about it. It's a service they are selling, and a service I'm buying.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The best answer is to find another place to play.

Best answer is actually talk to the coach. Find out the players shortcomings and see if there is a developmental plan to address the players needs.

If, after talking to the coach, there is no real plan to address the shortcomings or the coach is evasive about the players needs then absolutely find another team.

If you leave without knowing what your players limitations are, in the eyes of a coach, you will do the kid a great disservice. If you don't know or are unwilling to address the shortcomings they will not go away on their own through the magic of club practice and the same cycle will repeat itself.

Not really. Plenty of options out there. Just find a better environment. I did it for my son, and it was the best decision I made for him. He got more confident, he got better and got recruited at the University he wanted to.

And that worked out for you. I didn't say you have to stay at the club.

Exactly what is the downside to getting the current coaches perspective? Why not have that dialog? The coach could be wrong or off the mark but there is every chance that the coach is right. Change clubs if you want but your kid will be in a much better spot if you have an idea of what your players strengths and weaknesses are in the long run.

But I get it, people want to be outraged and blame the coach, travel soccer and just about anything but themselves. A coach may not be the best fit for your kid but that does not make them a bad coach or even wrong. It doesn't have to be personal. So, if you want the best for your kid then the best thing is to never waste an opportunity to get feedback or insight regarding your kids strengths and weaknesses. If you do that you will have more information to help guide your next decision. I really don't see what is so controversial about talking to an adult like an adult.

That's been talked about multiple times on this thread. And actually several posters told people to take their "loser" children to karate and other sports. Every parent I ever knew of that tried got nothing but hostility, no matter how they tried. But if it scratches an itch for someone, sure. Talk to the coach. However, clubs are much more likely to recruit over top of a bottom player than to develop one. So a fresh look and set of eyes is the approach that I have seen work out on a pretty consistent basis.

Again, taking it personally. If you want to leave then leave but you should leave armed with as much information as possible.

If you go into the conversation defensive and confrontational you will get a a defensive coach. If you go into the conversation like an adult you will have an adult conversation. But the only way that works is if you honestly just want the information without trying to change the coaches mind. You wouldn't go to your kids teacher in school and try and convince the teacher that your kid is great at math when she is consistently getting C's. But you would go in with a different perspective of your kid and try and have a dialog of why your kid is getting C's when your experience at home is that she understands the homework but chokes on tests?

The point of the conversation is to hopefully make your kid a better soccer player not to convince the other of anything. To many parents talk to coaches in transnational terms:
My kid should get more minutes
My kid should be Center Mid


If the conversation is started with:
How can my kid earn more minutes?
My kid would like to play Center mid, what does she need to improve to earn that position?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The best answer is to find another place to play.

Best answer is actually talk to the coach. Find out the players shortcomings and see if there is a developmental plan to address the players needs.

If, after talking to the coach, there is no real plan to address the shortcomings or the coach is evasive about the players needs then absolutely find another team.

If you leave without knowing what your players limitations are, in the eyes of a coach, you will do the kid a great disservice. If you don't know or are unwilling to address the shortcomings they will not go away on their own through the magic of club practice and the same cycle will repeat itself.

Not really. Plenty of options out there. Just find a better environment. I did it for my son, and it was the best decision I made for him. He got more confident, he got better and got recruited at the University he wanted to.

And that worked out for you. I didn't say you have to stay at the club.

Exactly what is the downside to getting the current coaches perspective? Why not have that dialog? The coach could be wrong or off the mark but there is every chance that the coach is right. Change clubs if you want but your kid will be in a much better spot if you have an idea of what your players strengths and weaknesses are in the long run.

But I get it, people want to be outraged and blame the coach, travel soccer and just about anything but themselves. A coach may not be the best fit for your kid but that does not make them a bad coach or even wrong. It doesn't have to be personal. So, if you want the best for your kid then the best thing is to never waste an opportunity to get feedback or insight regarding your kids strengths and weaknesses. If you do that you will have more information to help guide your next decision. I really don't see what is so controversial about talking to an adult like an adult.

That's been talked about multiple times on this thread. And actually several posters told people to take their "loser" children to karate and other sports. Every parent I ever knew of that tried got nothing but hostility, no matter how they tried. But if it scratches an itch for someone, sure. Talk to the coach. However, clubs are much more likely to recruit over top of a bottom player than to develop one. So a fresh look and set of eyes is the approach that I have seen work out on a pretty consistent basis.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The best answer is to find another place to play.

Best answer is actually talk to the coach. Find out the players shortcomings and see if there is a developmental plan to address the players needs.

If, after talking to the coach, there is no real plan to address the shortcomings or the coach is evasive about the players needs then absolutely find another team.

If you leave without knowing what your players limitations are, in the eyes of a coach, you will do the kid a great disservice. If you don't know or are unwilling to address the shortcomings they will not go away on their own through the magic of club practice and the same cycle will repeat itself.

Not really. Plenty of options out there. Just find a better environment. I did it for my son, and it was the best decision I made for him. He got more confident, he got better and got recruited at the University he wanted to.

And that worked out for you. I didn't say you have to stay at the club.

Exactly what is the downside to getting the current coaches perspective? Why not have that dialog? The coach could be wrong or off the mark but there is every chance that the coach is right. Change clubs if you want but your kid will be in a much better spot if you have an idea of what your players strengths and weaknesses are in the long run.

But I get it, people want to be outraged and blame the coach, travel soccer and just about anything but themselves. A coach may not be the best fit for your kid but that does not make them a bad coach or even wrong. It doesn't have to be personal. So, if you want the best for your kid then the best thing is to never waste an opportunity to get feedback or insight regarding your kids strengths and weaknesses. If you do that you will have more information to help guide your next decision. I really don't see what is so controversial about talking to an adult like an adult.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The best answer is to find another place to play.

Best answer is actually talk to the coach. Find out the players shortcomings and see if there is a developmental plan to address the players needs.

If, after talking to the coach, there is no real plan to address the shortcomings or the coach is evasive about the players needs then absolutely find another team.

If you leave without knowing what your players limitations are, in the eyes of a coach, you will do the kid a great disservice. If you don't know or are unwilling to address the shortcomings they will not go away on their own through the magic of club practice and the same cycle will repeat itself.

Not really. Plenty of options out there. Just find a better environment. I did it for my son, and it was the best decision I made for him. He got more confident, he got better and got recruited at the University he wanted to.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The best answer is to find another place to play.

Best answer is actually talk to the coach. Find out the players shortcomings and see if there is a developmental plan to address the players needs.

If, after talking to the coach, there is no real plan to address the shortcomings or the coach is evasive about the players needs then absolutely find another team.

If you leave without knowing what your players limitations are, in the eyes of a coach, you will do the kid a great disservice. If you don't know or are unwilling to address the shortcomings they will not go away on their own through the magic of club practice and the same cycle will repeat itself.

Anonymous wrote:The best answer is to find another place to play.

Anonymous wrote:I've had kids play in Alexandria and Arlington. I've never seen kids play significantly less than half of a game at either club or sit for extended periods on the bench. But both clubs made clear that kids were only guaranteed 50% playing time for the season (not per game) and that no playing time for tournaments was "guaranteed" because the focus was more on winning in order to get that fourth tournament game. This Alexandria Futsal ID FAQ pretty much sums it up:

If selected to the team should my son/daughter expect a certain amount of playing time?
Playing time at the U9-12 level will be managed to give a player at least 50% of playing time in league play over the course of the entire season (not per game). U13-16 will be based off commitment, work ethic, and skill level. In major tournaments, playoffs or finals coaches will coach to win.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem for younger kids is how do you define "ability"?

I've got a small kid whose technical skills were outstanding when he was younger (still are). Every single coach said so. You know how he got that way? Working on his own all the time - after practice, with friends, against the stairs at home, against walls. Still, despite working hard, he often sat on the bench while the big fast kids who were always late for practice and games played every second. Who was "better"? Well, the other kids were definitely stronger and faster. But my kids was smarter, more technical, and harder working. Didn't matter. Why should a small player have to work that harder on his own to get in a game when that that kid with no touch just kicks and runs past players to score and is never told work work harder to get more playing time? Many of the small kids or slow kids on travel teams are working hard on their own. Plenty of kids who are hard working, talented, coachable, and skilled sit in favor of more athletically advanced players . This happens at every club. Smaller, slower, and less athletic kids need the playing time to figure out how to be effective despite their lack of physical gifts or late puberty. But when playing time is a reward for the fastest to grow and develop, the late developers are further disadvantaged.

The "work harder" message makes more sense at U15/U16, but it is often too late by then for late for the bench kids. The late bloomers who rise to the top are those with the toughest mindset and those who found ways to get playing time in regardless, like those who found free play opportunities.

Whatever you think the goal of travel soccer should be, I can attest from personal experience that telling your kids to work harder but allowing them to stay in an environment where playing time is not based on hard work, effort, or even ability can backfire and lead to a kid who checks out in areas other than soccer. We all need to understand that life is not fair, but there is no benefit from an experience that teaches kids that working hard gets you nowhere if you haven't hit puberty by 7th or 8th grade. You can say that "cream rises" but the goal shouldn't be to drive as many late developing kids out as possible.

You move your kid to where they will play. You’re driving your own kid out of the game by keeping them in a situation that does not benefit their development.

Now you either believe in his talent and in the training with bigger and faster kids who can push him to improve, yet sacrifice game minutes or you can move him to a team that either appreciates his game while offering appropriate challenge and playing time.

You are only a victim if you choose to be a victim.