Anonymous
03/04/2026 18:29
Subject: Not inviting kids.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Skip all the events. Send a card and a $50 gift card to Amazon. Sign all 4 names on the card. Done.
Only if you’re a massive overgrown toddler like this person, OP.
Trying to understand how declining and sending a gift from the family is a overgrow toddler move.
Oh yes, because you really think “a $50 Amazon gift card” is an appropriate wedding gift for anyone, let alone a sibling, in 2026. Please, girl. You, and OP, are just pissy that her kids aren’t invited, thus your tacky comment. Don’t even try it.
I appreciate any gift and thank whoever gives it. In many cases, yes, a $50 gift card is an appropriate wedding gift. Instead of attacking people who have different financial resources or traditions than you why don't you spend some time reflecting on your anger.
Why would you say a $50 card and sign all 4 names? You’re trying to be petty. Just say “send a gift” why be specific unless you’re trying to make a point with that specific gift?
Whose names should she sign?
The adults. The people who can actually sign their own names.
I would also let my toddles scribble or draw a picture on cards.
And your infant is a baby Leonardo da Vinci I'm sure. Everyone isn't as impressed with your kids as you are.
Anonymous
03/04/2026 18:28
Subject: Not inviting kids.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I don’t think so. Pump if you want. Sounds like you do t want to. It’s not reasonable to bring a 3 month old to a nice, small, private dinner.
If this 3 month old is 100% breastfed do you have ANY idea how uncomfortable this dinner will be for the Mom? Painful. I would go to the 15 person dinner and have my husband watch the baby in a very nearby hotel so that I could excuse myself to breastfeed as needed. Skip Europe.
What in the world? Breastfeeding moms can eat in a restaurant without the baby for a dinner. And a hotel? OP lives locally to this wedding.
Local doesn't mean next door necessarily.
Right- you need to consider the transit time, etc. I would expect a wedding celebration dinner like this to go at least 2-3 hrs, this isn't a run of the mill dinner. Those first couple months of nursing were tough for me on several levels and I definitely had a couple situations where I did a "drive by" without the baby because staying longer wasn't in the cards.
But I wouldn't expect a childless couple to know this and would just say you're a "maybe" for now and will assess closer to the date.
How many 15 person wedding celebration dinners have you been to?
I've been to a couple small weddings actually, can't remember how many people exactly but in the 15-25 guest count. Was there another question?
No, I just think you have an overactive imagination. Because clearly if a dinner is 2-3 hours long it's completely inappropriate for a newborn and toddler. Which you would know if you've been to such a dinner and are a real parent.
NP. Do you even remember having a 3 month old? I brought mine to a wedding actually. I nursed under a cover and then the baby slept in her stroller the entire night. In fact, dh and I used to go out to dinner nonstop at this stage because babies are so easy to travel with. 1 year olds are awful though.
Anonymous
03/04/2026 18:27
Subject: Not inviting kids.
Anonymous wrote:This is the kind of couple who isn’t going to write a thank you note. Just saying…
Definitely skip the destination wedding. Go to the other one with your baby. Get a sitter for the toddler.
Maybe Mommy and Daddy will write the thank yous.
Anonymous
03/04/2026 18:27
Subject: Not inviting kids.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Skip all the events. Send a card and a $50 gift card to Amazon. Sign all 4 names on the card. Done.
Only if you’re a massive overgrown toddler like this person, OP.
Trying to understand how declining and sending a gift from the family is a overgrow toddler move.
Oh yes, because you really think “a $50 Amazon gift card” is an appropriate wedding gift for anyone, let alone a sibling, in 2026. Please, girl. You, and OP, are just pissy that her kids aren’t invited, thus your tacky comment. Don’t even try it.
I appreciate any gift and thank whoever gives it. In many cases, yes, a $50 gift card is an appropriate wedding gift. Instead of attacking people who have different financial resources or traditions than you why don't you spend some time reflecting on your anger.
Why would you say a $50 card and sign all 4 names? You’re trying to be petty. Just say “send a gift” why be specific unless you’re trying to make a point with that specific gift?
Whose names should she sign?
The adults. The people who can actually sign their own names.
I would also let my toddles scribble or draw a picture on cards.
Anonymous
03/04/2026 18:26
Subject: Not inviting kids.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Skip all the events. Send a card and a $50 gift card to Amazon. Sign all 4 names on the card. Done.
Only if you’re a massive overgrown toddler like this person, OP.
Trying to understand how declining and sending a gift from the family is a overgrow toddler move.
Oh yes, because you really think “a $50 Amazon gift card” is an appropriate wedding gift for anyone, let alone a sibling, in 2026. Please, girl. You, and OP, are just pissy that her kids aren’t invited, thus your tacky comment. Don’t even try it.
I appreciate any gift and thank whoever gives it. In many cases, yes, a $50 gift card is an appropriate wedding gift. Instead of attacking people who have different financial resources or traditions than you why don't you spend some time reflecting on your anger.
Why would you say a $50 card and sign all 4 names? You’re trying to be petty. Just say “send a gift” why be specific unless you’re trying to make a point with that specific gift?
It's not petty to sign all the names.
In family we all sign names to gifts and cards whether the person was involved in picking the gift or attended the event. The op's family is probably the same.
Anonymous
03/04/2026 18:24
Subject: Not inviting kids.
Anonymous wrote:This is the kind of couple who isn’t going to write a thank you note. Just saying…
Definitely skip the destination wedding. Go to the other one with your baby. Get a sitter for the toddler.
You are so right!
Anonymous
03/04/2026 18:01
Subject: Not inviting kids.
Anonymous wrote:This is the kind of couple who isn’t going to write a thank you note. Just saying…
Definitely skip the destination wedding. Go to the other one with your baby. Get a sitter for the toddler.
Well, if OP is going to spitefully sign a baby's name to the gift who wasn't invited, it doesn't really matter. Plenty of snubbing to go around.
Anonymous
03/04/2026 17:59
Subject: Not inviting kids.
This is the kind of couple who isn’t going to write a thank you note. Just saying…
Definitely skip the destination wedding. Go to the other one with your baby. Get a sitter for the toddler.
Definitely skip the destination wedding. Go to the other one with your baby. Get a sitter for the toddler.
Anonymous
03/04/2026 16:38
Subject: Not inviting kids.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Just don't go. For the dinner, I'd just make it clear that if you can't bring the infant that you'll just drop by but not stay due to breastfeeding infant. My sister got married when I had an infant and even though she's lovely, childless people (and grandparents who are far removed from that phase) can just be really clueless about this stuff (I was too!). My kids were kinda nightmares at restaurants in the toddler phase so I'd be inclined to set up the toddler with a sitter anyway.
Yes, people can be clueless, but millions of women with nursing babies go to work every day. OP can untether for a few hours.
Or she can decline. It sounds like brother is just inviting as a courtesy anyway.
Yes, but getting so triggered by this that she posts on DCUM and there is a 20 page response? OP needs to grow up and make her choice; it's not that big of a deal to spend a few hours away from a 3 month old. 3 hour old baby, sure
Anonymous
03/04/2026 11:10
Subject: Not inviting kids.
Anonymous wrote:I don’t think so. Pump if you want. Sounds like you do t want to. It’s not reasonable to bring a 3 month old to a nice, small, private dinner.
My babies slept a lot at that age, I don't think it's unreasonable to allow a sister to bring an infant to make it easier to attend. Sounds like he doesn't want to. That's a choice but he is free to make it.
FWIW, for our wedding we only included kids in our families in the invite, but I had a couple friends who did ask if they could bring their young babies, and I said yes. I wanted them to attend and for us the biggest issue was venue capacity but babies didn't count towards that.
Anonymous
03/04/2026 10:18
Subject: Not inviting kids.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Just don't go. For the dinner, I'd just make it clear that if you can't bring the infant that you'll just drop by but not stay due to breastfeeding infant. My sister got married when I had an infant and even though she's lovely, childless people (and grandparents who are far removed from that phase) can just be really clueless about this stuff (I was too!). My kids were kinda nightmares at restaurants in the toddler phase so I'd be inclined to set up the toddler with a sitter anyway.
Yes, people can be clueless, but millions of women with nursing babies go to work every day. OP can untether for a few hours.
Or she can decline. It sounds like brother is just inviting as a courtesy anyway.
Anonymous
03/04/2026 10:17
Subject: Not inviting kids.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I don’t think so. Pump if you want. Sounds like you do t want to. It’s not reasonable to bring a 3 month old to a nice, small, private dinner.
If this 3 month old is 100% breastfed do you have ANY idea how uncomfortable this dinner will be for the Mom? Painful. I would go to the 15 person dinner and have my husband watch the baby in a very nearby hotel so that I could excuse myself to breastfeed as needed. Skip Europe.
What in the world? Breastfeeding moms can eat in a restaurant without the baby for a dinner. And a hotel? OP lives locally to this wedding.
Local doesn't mean next door necessarily.
Right- you need to consider the transit time, etc. I would expect a wedding celebration dinner like this to go at least 2-3 hrs, this isn't a run of the mill dinner. Those first couple months of nursing were tough for me on several levels and I definitely had a couple situations where I did a "drive by" without the baby because staying longer wasn't in the cards.
But I wouldn't expect a childless couple to know this and would just say you're a "maybe" for now and will assess closer to the date.
How many 15 person wedding celebration dinners have you been to?
I've been to a couple small weddings actually, can't remember how many people exactly but in the 15-25 guest count. Was there another question?
No, I just think you have an overactive imagination. Because clearly if a dinner is 2-3 hours long it's completely inappropriate for a newborn and toddler. Which you would know if you've been to such a dinner and are a real parent.
I mean it's up to OP to ask these questions so that she can judge whether she could make it through the wedding celebration without nursing or pumping. How far away is it (local can be relative in the DMV) and is this Olive Garden style or a 5 course dinner at a Michilin restaurant? You guys are all making assumptions but none of us know.
Anonymous
03/04/2026 08:50
Subject: Not inviting kids.
Anonymous wrote:Just don't go. For the dinner, I'd just make it clear that if you can't bring the infant that you'll just drop by but not stay due to breastfeeding infant. My sister got married when I had an infant and even though she's lovely, childless people (and grandparents who are far removed from that phase) can just be really clueless about this stuff (I was too!). My kids were kinda nightmares at restaurants in the toddler phase so I'd be inclined to set up the toddler with a sitter anyway.
Yes, people can be clueless, but millions of women with nursing babies go to work every day. OP can untether for a few hours.
Anonymous
03/04/2026 08:45
Subject: Not inviting kids.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I don’t think so. Pump if you want. Sounds like you do t want to. It’s not reasonable to bring a 3 month old to a nice, small, private dinner.
If this 3 month old is 100% breastfed do you have ANY idea how uncomfortable this dinner will be for the Mom? Painful. I would go to the 15 person dinner and have my husband watch the baby in a very nearby hotel so that I could excuse myself to breastfeed as needed. Skip Europe.
What in the world? Breastfeeding moms can eat in a restaurant without the baby for a dinner. And a hotel? OP lives locally to this wedding.
Local doesn't mean next door necessarily.
Right- you need to consider the transit time, etc. I would expect a wedding celebration dinner like this to go at least 2-3 hrs, this isn't a run of the mill dinner. Those first couple months of nursing were tough for me on several levels and I definitely had a couple situations where I did a "drive by" without the baby because staying longer wasn't in the cards.
But I wouldn't expect a childless couple to know this and would just say you're a "maybe" for now and will assess closer to the date.
How many 15 person wedding celebration dinners have you been to?
I've been to a couple small weddings actually, can't remember how many people exactly but in the 15-25 guest count. Was there another question?
No, I just think you have an overactive imagination. Because clearly if a dinner is 2-3 hours long it's completely inappropriate for a newborn and toddler. Which you would know if you've been to such a dinner and are a real parent.
Anonymous
03/04/2026 02:25
Subject: Not inviting kids.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I don’t think so. Pump if you want. Sounds like you do t want to. It’s not reasonable to bring a 3 month old to a nice, small, private dinner.
If this 3 month old is 100% breastfed do you have ANY idea how uncomfortable this dinner will be for the Mom? Painful. I would go to the 15 person dinner and have my husband watch the baby in a very nearby hotel so that I could excuse myself to breastfeed as needed. Skip Europe.
What in the world? Breastfeeding moms can eat in a restaurant without the baby for a dinner. And a hotel? OP lives locally to this wedding.
Local doesn't mean next door necessarily.
Right- you need to consider the transit time, etc. I would expect a wedding celebration dinner like this to go at least 2-3 hrs, this isn't a run of the mill dinner. Those first couple months of nursing were tough for me on several levels and I definitely had a couple situations where I did a "drive by" without the baby because staying longer wasn't in the cards.
But I wouldn't expect a childless couple to know this and would just say you're a "maybe" for now and will assess closer to the date.
How many 15 person wedding celebration dinners have you been to?
I've been to a couple small weddings actually, can't remember how many people exactly but in the 15-25 guest count. Was there another question?