Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - any update?

We did find out some of this was uploaded to TikTok so we had to escalate our reactions a bit. Coaches have been great as have a few parents. So we feel mostly supported.


We’re getting it all figured out and I appreciate the feedback.

Anonymous wrote:OP - any update?

Anonymous wrote:OP, does he know what brand of gummies?

I have horrible sleep issues and take a brand called Olly and it also has some botanical additives. Including L-theanine. You are going to want to make sure it was melatonin only.

I would call and try to figure out what was given to him exactly (dosage too).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Melatonin is not dangerous at all.

If taken in small does and you know about it. Many will even disagree with that.

I let one of my teens take a small dose of melatonin before bed. We discuss with his doctor every year and he’s okay with this.

I would be livid if I was OP. You shouldn’t sneak anything with the intention on having someone else take it without their knowledge.

No, I would not tell the parents but I’d encourage my kid to find new friends/team and I would say no to future sleepovers. Telling parents isn’t effective at this age. More often it causes more issues.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did the coach respond? I saw the parent responses, but am hoping to not have to weed through 20 pages.

OP has gone MIA - may have been a troll...

Or OP has a life beyond DCUM. Imagine that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did the coach respond? I saw the parent responses, but am hoping to not have to weed through 20 pages.

OP has gone MIA - may have been a troll...

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Anonymous wrote:Np. I am so sorry this happened. My thoughts:

1. Tell the school. I’m no longer in DMV but at our public kids can be disciplined for activities that take place outside school. They may be able to help determine whether anything has been uploaded to social media.

You also don’t want your kid to have any classes with these boys and they should have different lunch periods.

2. Tell the coach. He has a problem on his team and needs to know.

3. Tell the parents. I like the idea of a group email to all of them. You shouldn’t have to send 14 separate emails.

4. Help for your son: therapist to process the incident and confirm it was not his fault. Also, to increase confidence so he learns that these guys are not his friends and that he should not aspire to be friends with him.

Good luck and please keep us posted. Your kid sounds awesome and he does not need to hang out with these jerks.

This is unnecessary and very likely impossible.

Restraining order

At that point it’s easier to switch schools.

Only 5 of the kids go to the same school as DS. He has his own friends at school outside these boys.

But these boys (soccer boys) are of a higher social status and could make DS life hell if the wish. He knows that.

When will this social status crap end. They already made his life miserable. He needs to make friends with the football, hockey and lacrosse players if your concern is them bullying him. Soccer isn’t exactly known for, well, anything in the US except children’s activities. Maybe a new sport would help.

Oh, he is in track too. He’s a so-so soccer player on a so-so team but he’s very talented as a long distance runner. Obviously also not a super respected sport, but he truly excels.

This is such a weird comment.

+1
OP I’m beginning to think you’re a troll or a bored teenager obsessed with social status. If you are not, then please stop trying to decide what’s respected or not, what’s where in a social hierarchy, etc. It’s not clear if your son plays hs soccer or just club. Regardless he should drop both since he doesn’t sound great and his team is not adding anything to his life. Instead put him in hs cross country (same season as soccer anyways), indoor and outdoor track.

I also suspect OP is a troll. Don't most soccer leagues end the season in May?

I suspect your not very bright. I think you and PP are the trolls. Can’t anyone just come on here and ask for support or advice without everyone trying to be a modern Sherlock Holmes and find flaws and pick it apart. Even if soccer ended in May who gives a F? My kids play on teams that ended in May and they all still get together over the summer as a team for things like this. Honestly, you can really see the adults here who probably spawned the very same kinds of kids who do stuff like this to others.

But they had practice yesterday

This does seem suspect. All of the kids are done, except the ones going to championships. This means there’s a very narrow set of kids this could be. OP if your son is on the team I’m guessing he’s on, that culture is highly toxic.

There are summer rec leagues, summer skills camps, etc.

OP could have changed the sport. I do that all the time.

Anonymous wrote:Did the coach respond? I saw the parent responses, but am hoping to not have to weed through 20 pages.

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Np. I am so sorry this happened. My thoughts:

1. Tell the school. I’m no longer in DMV but at our public kids can be disciplined for activities that take place outside school. They may be able to help determine whether anything has been uploaded to social media.

You also don’t want your kid to have any classes with these boys and they should have different lunch periods.

2. Tell the coach. He has a problem on his team and needs to know.

3. Tell the parents. I like the idea of a group email to all of them. You shouldn’t have to send 14 separate emails.

4. Help for your son: therapist to process the incident and confirm it was not his fault. Also, to increase confidence so he learns that these guys are not his friends and that he should not aspire to be friends with him.

Good luck and please keep us posted. Your kid sounds awesome and he does not need to hang out with these jerks.

This is unnecessary and very likely impossible.

Restraining order

At that point it’s easier to switch schools.

Only 5 of the kids go to the same school as DS. He has his own friends at school outside these boys.

But these boys (soccer boys) are of a higher social status and could make DS life hell if the wish. He knows that.

When will this social status crap end. They already made his life miserable. He needs to make friends with the football, hockey and lacrosse players if your concern is them bullying him. Soccer isn’t exactly known for, well, anything in the US except children’s activities. Maybe a new sport would help.

Oh, he is in track too. He’s a so-so soccer player on a so-so team but he’s very talented as a long distance runner. Obviously also not a super respected sport, but he truly excels.

This is such a weird comment.

+1
OP I’m beginning to think you’re a troll or a bored teenager obsessed with social status. If you are not, then please stop trying to decide what’s respected or not, what’s where in a social hierarchy, etc. It’s not clear if your son plays hs soccer or just club. Regardless he should drop both since he doesn’t sound great and his team is not adding anything to his life. Instead put him in hs cross country (same season as soccer anyways), indoor and outdoor track.

I also suspect OP is a troll. Don't most soccer leagues end the season in May?

I suspect your not very bright. I think you and PP are the trolls. Can’t anyone just come on here and ask for support or advice without everyone trying to be a modern Sherlock Holmes and find flaws and pick it apart. Even if soccer ended in May who gives a F? My kids play on teams that ended in May and they all still get together over the summer as a team for things like this. Honestly, you can really see the adults here who probably spawned the very same kinds of kids who do stuff like this to others.

But they had practice yesterday

This does seem suspect. All of the kids are done, except the ones going to championships. This means there’s a very narrow set of kids this could be. OP if your son is on the team I’m guessing he’s on, that culture is highly toxic.

There are summer rec leagues, summer skills camps, etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Np. I am so sorry this happened. My thoughts:

1. Tell the school. I’m no longer in DMV but at our public kids can be disciplined for activities that take place outside school. They may be able to help determine whether anything has been uploaded to social media.

You also don’t want your kid to have any classes with these boys and they should have different lunch periods.

2. Tell the coach. He has a problem on his team and needs to know.

3. Tell the parents. I like the idea of a group email to all of them. You shouldn’t have to send 14 separate emails.

4. Help for your son: therapist to process the incident and confirm it was not his fault. Also, to increase confidence so he learns that these guys are not his friends and that he should not aspire to be friends with him.

Good luck and please keep us posted. Your kid sounds awesome and he does not need to hang out with these jerks.

This is unnecessary and very likely impossible.

Restraining order

At that point it’s easier to switch schools.

Only 5 of the kids go to the same school as DS. He has his own friends at school outside these boys.

But these boys (soccer boys) are of a higher social status and could make DS life hell if the wish. He knows that.

When will this social status crap end. They already made his life miserable. He needs to make friends with the football, hockey and lacrosse players if your concern is them bullying him. Soccer isn’t exactly known for, well, anything in the US except children’s activities. Maybe a new sport would help.

Oh, he is in track too. He’s a so-so soccer player on a so-so team but he’s very talented as a long distance runner. Obviously also not a super respected sport, but he truly excels.

This is such a weird comment.

+1
OP I’m beginning to think you’re a troll or a bored teenager obsessed with social status. If you are not, then please stop trying to decide what’s respected or not, what’s where in a social hierarchy, etc. It’s not clear if your son plays hs soccer or just club. Regardless he should drop both since he doesn’t sound great and his team is not adding anything to his life. Instead put him in hs cross country (same season as soccer anyways), indoor and outdoor track.

I also suspect OP is a troll. Don't most soccer leagues end the season in May?

I suspect your not very bright. I think you and PP are the trolls. Can’t anyone just come on here and ask for support or advice without everyone trying to be a modern Sherlock Holmes and find flaws and pick it apart. Even if soccer ended in May who gives a F? My kids play on teams that ended in May and they all still get together over the summer as a team for things like this. Honestly, you can really see the adults here who probably spawned the very same kinds of kids who do stuff like this to others.

But they had practice yesterday

This does seem suspect. All of the kids are done, except the ones going to championships. This means there’s a very narrow set of kids this could be. OP if your son is on the team I’m guessing he’s on, that culture is highly toxic.

Anonymous wrote:Tell the parents. I would even consider getting your kid a therapist if he falls apart over you telling. He needs to understand how serious this is and if that boy doesn't have any consequences next time he could end up killing someone. Yes, kids have died from too much melatonin. I think it was younger kids, but this is serious and cannot be ignored. Your son also needs to learn that his health and safety matter more than fitting in. If he doesn't learn this lesson, he will be prey for frat boys hazing and doing other things. It's hard to stand up for justice as parents and as kids, but this is truly disturbing and cannot be ignored.

Anonymous wrote:I work in a sports related field and the stories of what teammates do to each other would apparently surprise some of you. Yes, kids, not adults. The hazing and bullying and harassment and physical assaults…good luck to your kids if you think this doesn’t sound real.

And OP being concerned these kids have a high social status SHOULD worry OP. It’s not a sign she’s a troll. The power imbalance is a common factor in hazing and bullying and often contributes to why it continues to happen. Bystanders are afraid to speak up because they’re afraid of being targeted next. Adults don’t want to rock the boat or simply can’t believe (see above) that these great athletes might also be horrible people.