Anonymous
Post 11/19/2017 10:28     Subject: He runs with her 5-6 days a week.
She is probably just a good running buddy and a very close friend but that doesn't mean he's having an affair with her. I worked closely with a colleague for 2 years- we shared an office and told each other just about everything we did in our outside life. He was a "best friend" and we were very close. But neither of us ever tried taking it beyond this- we were both married and never crossed the boundaries. In a prior job, two of my colleagues (male and female) trained for a marathon together- they spent most nights running after work and then would do long runs on weekends. We could all see the spark- but she ended up marrying her fiance who was in another state getting a law degree- i'm pretty sure that they never did anything more than run.
Tell your DH that you've seen the "gorgeous", etc. texts and explain it makes you uncomfortable. Ask that he let the running mate know this.
Anonymous
Post 11/19/2017 10:14     Subject: He runs with her 5-6 days a week.
file this under the category of “hell no!”
no other discussion needed
Anonymous
Post 11/17/2017 20:44     Subject: Re:He runs with her 5-6 days a week.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP again. This is my last response.

I'm floored that there are folks that don't believe that someone, my husband in this case, could have such a kind and loving response. It makes me sad for you that you may not have ever experienced this. At dinner tonight, not only did he reiterate everything he said earlier, but he also talked to another (male) friend about working towards doing the Marine Corp Marathon.

Who has time to troll, especially with all my detail? I certainly don't.

Thank you for the kind legitimate responses I got. It really did help.

Why are you still trolling?


If you really think she's at troll then why don't you stop reading this thread. Who elected you Master troll Hunter? I've reported you and I hope you realize how annoying your troll calling is. You're trying to derail a very helpful thread and you're upsetting someone who was actually getting good responses from people. Go start your own thread and call yourself a troll if you need to.

Most people know this is a fake post but choose to go along with the discussion. PP seems like that one kid in school who got upset when she was told that Santa wasn’t real.


I just don't understand why you troll people have to police this site. Just ask the moderator if she is a troll. Get a life.
Anonymous
Post 11/15/2017 16:34     Subject: Re:He runs with her 5-6 days a week.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP HERE for another update. This has taken an interesting turn.

Because of these posts, it started to make me question if there really could have been anything else going on so, last night, I pushed him a bit more. "Are you sure nothing ever happened?" I repeated it again and with more prompting, it came out. Apparently, about a year ago or so, there was a "phase" of time (he says over a year) where after work/happy hours where there was drinking, it would be dark and he would walk her to her car (totally believable since he always walks me and the women in his life to their cars after dark). But that when they said goodbye, apparently the hugs would linger and week after week, (they'd work together 2-3 times a month) the hugs got longer. He says that eventually it got to the point where he had to tell her that they had to stop, it was inappropriate and that his family and wife was the most important thing, etc, etc and they stopped, so he says. I asked if they ever kissed, he says he only kissed her once on the cheek. He said once she said to him, "Can't we just make out?"

So, a bit upset and confused (is this cheating? is this an affair? is this even a big deal?) I left the house to drive around and called a friend that suggested I go to her house and get the story from the other woman. I was fired up so I drove to her house. Her husband answered the door (confused someone would be knocking at 9pm in the rain) and went and got her.

I simply said, "I know what happened between you and my husband. Now I want to hear your side of the story." and emotionless, she went on to tell me the same story as my husband except that they "touched but not genitals" (not sure what that means), and that there was a kiss on the lips but not open mouth. I said, "thank you and there will be no more running" and left (trying not to punch her). Before I got home, an e-mail went from him to her (I was bcc'd) that basically said, "I can no longer run with you as being around you is not honorable to my wife and family, etc" And I think she wrote back something like, "okay, have a nice life."

How should I perceive this "relationship"? Would you say this was cheating? An emotional affair?



Personally, yes I would consider it an emotional affair and a form of cheating. He needs to work to rebuild your trust.



NP. Agree that this created a crack but nothing is broken with a fallen piece yet. His honesty and voluntary action WAS work and should count towards an act of building trust. How you handle this can be critical — too much overreaction and he’ll never let you in on vulnerabilities again. Chill, fly below the radar and keep being a safe fun space for him. And take up running. That work is the easiest to help make sure your both running in the same direction. Just try it. It will go far if he is the man you’ve described him as. Good luck.
Anonymous
Post 11/15/2017 16:28     Subject: He runs with her 5-6 days a week.
Anonymous wrote:If not for the texts, I'd probably say "don't worry about it." I can see her being happy to have a running buddy for safety purposes. It's hard to find a good running buddy who's at your same pace, same distance and lives nearby and has the same schedule.

But I think it's possible she's making a play for him.


X 2. Tell your DH to join a running group. Like other runners. They’re everywhere.
Anonymous
Post 11/15/2017 13:24     Subject: He runs with her 5-6 days a week.
Anonymous wrote:He’s peeling her panties off as soon as they finish running. For some guys, women’s pheromones are a huge turn on. I know when my DW gets home from the gym and her pheromones are kicking in, I love it!


OP needs to check his gym bag to see if he is saving those panties to sample those pheromones later on in the day. A lot of men would do that.
Anonymous
Post 11/15/2017 12:45     Subject: Re:He runs with her 5-6 days a week.
NP here. Lomg-time DCUM reader. Definitely a troll post with lots of sock puppeting.
Anonymous
Post 11/15/2017 11:40     Subject: Re:He runs with her 5-6 days a week.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP again. This is my last response.

I'm floored that there are folks that don't believe that someone, my husband in this case, could have such a kind and loving response. It makes me sad for you that you may not have ever experienced this. At dinner tonight, not only did he reiterate everything he said earlier, but he also talked to another (male) friend about working towards doing the Marine Corp Marathon.

Who has time to troll, especially with all my detail? I certainly don't.

Thank you for the kind legitimate responses I got. It really did help.

Why are you still trolling?


If you really think she's at troll then why don't you stop reading this thread. Who elected you Master troll Hunter? I've reported you and I hope you realize how annoying your troll calling is. You're trying to derail a very helpful thread and you're upsetting someone who was actually getting good responses from people. Go start your own thread and call yourself a troll if you need to.

Most people know this is a fake post but choose to go along with the discussion. PP seems like that one kid in school who got upset when she was told that Santa wasn’t real.
Anonymous
Post 11/14/2017 23:13     Subject: Re:He runs with her 5-6 days a week.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP again. This is my last response.

I'm floored that there are folks that don't believe that someone, my husband in this case, could have such a kind and loving response. It makes me sad for you that you may not have ever experienced this. At dinner tonight, not only did he reiterate everything he said earlier, but he also talked to another (male) friend about working towards doing the Marine Corp Marathon.

Who has time to troll, especially with all my detail? I certainly don't.

Thank you for the kind legitimate responses I got. It really did help.

Why are you still trolling?


If you really think she's at troll then why don't you stop reading this thread. Who elected you Master troll Hunter? I've reported you and I hope you realize how annoying your troll calling is. You're trying to derail a very helpful thread and you're upsetting someone who was actually getting good responses from people. Go start your own thread and call yourself a troll if you need to.
Anonymous
Post 11/14/2017 22:20     Subject: He runs with her 5-6 days a week.
I have not read all of the posts but I (as a DW) would have issue with this arrangement. Too much time together with another woman.
Anonymous
Post 11/14/2017 22:03     Subject: He runs with her 5-6 days a week.
^^ ... not you.
Anonymous
Post 11/14/2017 22:00     Subject: He runs with her 5-6 days a week.
He wouldn't be losing weight if he wasn't having an affair. He's doing it for her, now you.
Anonymous
Post 11/14/2017 20:40     Subject: He runs with her 5-6 days a week.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My co-worker who is a personal trainer started working out very early in the morning with the gym manager 4 times a week and before long they were having an affair. Gym manager's wife found out and they moved to NC. Exercising releases feel good hormones and when you start experiencing this with someone over a continued period of time then it can easily lead to an innocent friendship turning into something else.


I don't think it has anything to do with exercise and hormones.


So why do marriage counselors ask couples to work out together as one of the ways to bring them closer if they are drifting apart.

Check out #3

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/meet-catch-and-keep/201401/5-reasons-why-couples-who-sweat-together-stay-together


Lol. I'm in a happy marriage and the LAST thing I want to do is work out w my DH. Most psychology is just a bullsh*t racket based on dubious theories.


Thanks for your singular anecdote. -np
Anonymous
Post 11/14/2017 09:37     Subject: He runs with her 5-6 days a week.
This lady has the hots for your husband. Shut that sh*t down OP. Tell hubby to find another running buddy.
Anonymous
Post 11/13/2017 22:11     Subject: He runs with her 5-6 days a week.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My co-worker who is a personal trainer started working out very early in the morning with the gym manager 4 times a week and before long they were having an affair. Gym manager's wife found out and they moved to NC. Exercising releases feel good hormones and when you start experiencing this with someone over a continued period of time then it can easily lead to an innocent friendship turning into something else.


I don't think it has anything to do with exercise and hormones.


So why do marriage counselors ask couples to work out together as one of the ways to bring them closer if they are drifting apart.

Check out #3

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/meet-catch-and-keep/201401/5-reasons-why-couples-who-sweat-together-stay-together


Lol. I'm in a happy marriage and the LAST thing I want to do is work out w my DH. Most psychology is just a bullsh*t racket based on dubious theories.