Anonymous wrote:Many of you are missing the point.

The question is not whether or not you should buy your kids guacamole and queso. The question is whether you should allow your kids to add guac and queso to a food order without teaching them that doing so greatly increases the cost of the dish.

I buy my kids guacamole and other add ons like that all the time, but they know it costs more and will ASK before adding extra items to an order. That way they learn that it's extra. That's all. We get extras, but we want our kids to understand what it means for it to be extra. And yes there are circumstances in which I would not allow extras, for instance if the last time my kid added guac to their burrito, they complained they didn't like it and picked it off. But not because I'm trying to starve my extremely privileged children.

It's not about denying your kids food or being cheap, it's about making sure your kids understand how the world works including the fact that you nearly double the price of a burrito by adding guacamole and queso to it at burrito, and inane but still somehow important piece of information for a person to learn.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have been blessed with great wealth, and I am happy to pay for guacamole for my children.

But I would never pay for queso. Not because of the price, but because it is vulgar.

No one with any self respect would ever order queso.

We have been blessed with three times as much wealth as you, and we eat exclusively queso. All meals. You can tell how old money and classy someone is by their aggressive consumption of foods that the new money strivers consider beneath them. You have a lot to learn, my flashy and tacky guacamole eating friend!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is probably an American thing. I have realized that other people's kids would come to our house for a party, pile up their plates with food and then throw most of it away.

I saw the same behavior when the kids went to their day-care. Kids would pour out milk in the sink because their teachers told them that if they don't want to drink their milk they need to pour it out in the sink. They made the kids throw away uneaten lunch in the lunchbox before packing it back in their bags. Just NO. I told the daycare that I do not want uneaten food to be thrown away. I want to know how much food my kids consume and what they don't like. Also, only pour milk if they want it, and no more than 2 oz at a time. Tell them that they will pour more if the kids want it. Why pour out a full glass of milk?

In my home, when I saw that parents stood around like dumpf oafs watching their kids waste food, I stepped in. I would say - "In our house, we do not waste food. If you take food, you have to finish it. So, I will give you a small sample of anything you want to taste, if you like it, only then I will serve you a small size. You are allowed to take as many refills as you want, but you have to eat it. If you love something a lot and would like to take some back home, I will also gladly pack food for you to take home."

I didn't care what the parents thought about it. It was not as if there was any reciprocity that I had to worry about it. I organized, I cooked and I fed them. I very much was going to be the hostess who was raised in my non-American culture. We are generous and hospitable hosts but we do not waste food.

You are still way, WAY more wasteful than me. I tell people- children and adults alike- in my home, "in this house, we do not waste food. If you take food, you have to finish it." I will offer one spoonful of food at a time, and once they swallow the spoonful, if they can open up and show me that they have not pocketed the food in the corner of their mouth, I will allow them a second spoonful. Milk (or wine, for adults) would NEVER be poured 2oz at a time. Are you joking? I use shot glasses for our guests and fill them to the 1oz line with beverage. They can refill as many times as they want, but 1oz at a time is my limit. I also stand outside of the bathroom and pass them a square of toilet paper at a time (half a square for anyone under 10) and if they tell me they need a second square, that's fine, I'll give them one. They just have to ask. This is my home and we do not waste!

Exactly! DCUM control freaks at their finest!

Love this thread about how spending on luxury vacations won’t spoil Larla, but that damn guacamole at Chipotle will. I think this goes down in the annuls of lore here with my favorite thread about how you’ve spoiled your terms if they don’t make their own doctor’s appointment at age 13+.

Hi again! Glad you have time for all your posting! New day, new hours!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is probably an American thing. I have realized that other people's kids would come to our house for a party, pile up their plates with food and then throw most of it away.

I saw the same behavior when the kids went to their day-care. Kids would pour out milk in the sink because their teachers told them that if they don't want to drink their milk they need to pour it out in the sink. They made the kids throw away uneaten lunch in the lunchbox before packing it back in their bags. Just NO. I told the daycare that I do not want uneaten food to be thrown away. I want to know how much food my kids consume and what they don't like. Also, only pour milk if they want it, and no more than 2 oz at a time. Tell them that they will pour more if the kids want it. Why pour out a full glass of milk?

In my home, when I saw that parents stood around like dumpf oafs watching their kids waste food, I stepped in. I would say - "In our house, we do not waste food. If you take food, you have to finish it. So, I will give you a small sample of anything you want to taste, if you like it, only then I will serve you a small size. You are allowed to take as many refills as you want, but you have to eat it. If you love something a lot and would like to take some back home, I will also gladly pack food for you to take home."

I didn't care what the parents thought about it. It was not as if there was any reciprocity that I had to worry about it. I organized, I cooked and I fed them. I very much was going to be the hostess who was raised in my non-American culture. We are generous and hospitable hosts but we do not waste food.

You are still way, WAY more wasteful than me. I tell people- children and adults alike- in my home, "in this house, we do not waste food. If you take food, you have to finish it." I will offer one spoonful of food at a time, and once they swallow the spoonful, if they can open up and show me that they have not pocketed the food in the corner of their mouth, I will allow them a second spoonful. Milk (or wine, for adults) would NEVER be poured 2oz at a time. Are you joking? I use shot glasses for our guests and fill them to the 1oz line with beverage. They can refill as many times as they want, but 1oz at a time is my limit. I also stand outside of the bathroom and pass them a square of toilet paper at a time (half a square for anyone under 10) and if they tell me they need a second square, that's fine, I'll give them one. They just have to ask. This is my home and we do not waste!

Exactly! DCUM control freaks at their finest!

Love this thread about how spending on luxury vacations won’t spoil Larla, but that damn guacamole at Chipotle will. I think this goes down in the annuls of lore here with my favorite thread about how you’ve spoiled your terms if they don’t make their own doctor’s appointment at age 13+.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is amazing.

Fwiw, we have 7 figure HHI and generally skip extras. We will also often split large meals and desserts. It's not a question of affording, it's about not unnecessarily wasting and also value for money. It's not a thing that comes up, because our kids dont see us randomly ordering extras so they don't either.

We do pay for convenience. So we buy food at the airport instead of packing it unless we have leftovers that are easy to bring.

I don't actually find this super weird for UMC families.

You talk about value for money in the same breath as you talk about buying meals in an airport. The sanctimony and delusion here knows no bounds. Basically I have gathered that people feel moral superiority saying they don’t spend unnecessarily while in reality spending a ton on the unnecessary and using another label to defend it.

Anonymous wrote:Not sure about your exact example : your income but in general I think it is excellent parenting to not let your kids have everything they want all the time. Just teach them about opportunity cost, pros and cost, cost and benefits. Instilling a sense of control, frugality and deferred reward is very good parenting.

Now don't fall into that "cheap" tight mentality either. We see it on here once in a while with dating especially. That's usually with certain men. It's a fine line!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is probably an American thing. I have realized that other people's kids would come to our house for a party, pile up their plates with food and then throw most of it away.

I saw the same behavior when the kids went to their day-care. Kids would pour out milk in the sink because their teachers told them that if they don't want to drink their milk they need to pour it out in the sink. They made the kids throw away uneaten lunch in the lunchbox before packing it back in their bags. Just NO. I told the daycare that I do not want uneaten food to be thrown away. I want to know how much food my kids consume and what they don't like. Also, only pour milk if they want it, and no more than 2 oz at a time. Tell them that they will pour more if the kids want it. Why pour out a full glass of milk?

In my home, when I saw that parents stood around like dumpf oafs watching their kids waste food, I stepped in. I would say - "In our house, we do not waste food. If you take food, you have to finish it. So, I will give you a small sample of anything you want to taste, if you like it, only then I will serve you a small size. You are allowed to take as many refills as you want, but you have to eat it. If you love something a lot and would like to take some back home, I will also gladly pack food for you to take home."

I didn't care what the parents thought about it. It was not as if there was any reciprocity that I had to worry about it. I organized, I cooked and I fed them. I very much was going to be the hostess who was raised in my non-American culture. We are generous and hospitable hosts but we do not waste food.

You are still way, WAY more wasteful than me. I tell people- children and adults alike- in my home, "in this house, we do not waste food. If you take food, you have to finish it." I will offer one spoonful of food at a time, and once they swallow the spoonful, if they can open up and show me that they have not pocketed the food in the corner of their mouth, I will allow them a second spoonful. Milk (or wine, for adults) would NEVER be poured 2oz at a time. Are you joking? I use shot glasses for our guests and fill them to the 1oz line with beverage. They can refill as many times as they want, but 1oz at a time is my limit. I also stand outside of the bathroom and pass them a square of toilet paper at a time (half a square for anyone under 10) and if they tell me they need a second square, that's fine, I'll give them one. They just have to ask. This is my home and we do not waste!

Anonymous wrote:This thread is amazing.

Fwiw, we have 7 figure HHI and generally skip extras. We will also often split large meals and desserts. It's not a question of affording, it's about not unnecessarily wasting and also value for money. It's not a thing that comes up, because our kids dont see us randomly ordering extras so they don't either.

We do pay for convenience. So we buy food at the airport instead of packing it unless we have leftovers that are easy to bring.

I don't actually find this super weird for UMC families.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The person who can’t drive 2 miles to save $30 is making fun of the wealthy one?

Now that’s rich.

She's not answering the questions about her own college savings, home, etc. Clearly she thought she was going to be wealthier and that's why her choices are better (as in, "5 minutes of my time is not worth $30").

Come on...divulge the same info!

You have COMPLETELY missed the point of the question about your big ticket spending! How is it possible to be so dumb?!

Gee, this made us forget all about your failure to answer about your income and assets. Good one.

Troll better, no one is actually this stupid.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The person who can’t drive 2 miles to save $30 is making fun of the wealthy one?

Now that’s rich.

She's not answering the questions about her own college savings, home, etc. Clearly she thought she was going to be wealthier and that's why her choices are better (as in, "5 minutes of my time is not worth $30").

Come on...divulge the same info!

You have COMPLETELY missed the point of the question about your big ticket spending! How is it possible to be so dumb?!

Gee, this made us forget all about your failure to answer about your income and assets. Good one.