Anonymous wrote:Is it exploitative to pay people high hazard pay (often $200k+) to perform mining, underwater welding, oil drilling and high-rise construction work?

Apples and cement! Absolutely no comparison.

Is it exploitative to pay people high hazard pay (often $200k+) to perform mining, underwater welding, oil drilling and high-rise construction work?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never put my body through pregnancy. I adopted my kids.

This is nothing to brag about.

Not the poster you were responding to, but I’m always glad to see people choose adoption.

Adoption is more often than not a traumatic experience for the adoptee & birth mother.

…As if leaving babies and young children to be raised within a state’s foster care system (or the overseas equivalent, etc?) is the better option here?

By choose adoption, I mean when people choose to adopt. There are a lot of babies and kids who need loving homes.

Abortion access is the better option. Something that many women who give a baby up for adoption didn’t have access to.

Reproductive justice demands we respect all choices. Even those that have the ability choose abortion may want to choose adoption; it is not your place—nor anyone else’s—to say what choice is “better.”

Even if abortion was available and accessible to all individuals as it should be, regardless of income or zip code, adoption would remain a valid option and one that someone may end up choosing for a variety of reasons.

If your position is that no one should continue a pregnancy without be willing to raise the child themselves or have a private adoption agreement in place at an early stage, that is one take…but ignores how life works. Take a woman who had hoped to raise a child but then a catastrophic financial event occurred that left them unable to afford the baby. Or a person who did have a private adoption agreement in place that fell through. Or even more simply, someone who felt panicked and lost and—while they opposed abortion—felt handing over the baby to a foster home was the best outcome.

But go on, hold your noise up in the air and continue to dictate the lives of others.

OP’s question was “would you do it in my situation?”

The 18 pages of debate show that it’s a divisive issue, with many strongly opposed. Your family and friends may similarly fall into the latter category and may judge you and your decision negatively.

There was also the point of being perceived as vain with misplaced priorities: you want to bring a child into this world for life but you in turn spend nine months and a few extra pounds on the effort.

To answer your question, no, I would not do it. Too many risks, too much judgment. I would take the money and do practical things, namely:
1) prenatal yoga and pilates
2) hire a night nurse after birth so that you rest and recover faster
3) personal trainer 3-4 months after birth or when you’re ready

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I have a friend from high school who is a surrogate. She's actually pregnant with surro baby #2. Her and her family (she has 2 kids) live on a farm and it pays the bills. She's religious and LOVES being pregnant. She has easy pregnancies and gives birth easily thus far. She told me she made 65 or 75k (I can't remember now).

I had 3 easy pregnancies. I had tons of energy and they didn't slow me down. I was never sick. My births were long, but easy. It's a pretty good side hustle.

I don't think this is unethical at all. If people were allowed to sell kidneys, people would be lining up to sell them. How is that preying on the poor any more than making them work in mines, as road construction workers or a myriad of physically difficult jobs.

If your friend is making $65,000/$75,000 from surrogacy, she is breaking the law and I hope both she and whoever is brokering these $$$$$ deals, as well as the couples buying these babies are caught and prosecuted and given stiff prison sentences.
This is immoral.

Depends on the state. In CA not illegal at all.

https://familytreesurrogacy.com/blog/surrogate-pay-california/#:~:text=a%20fair%20compensation.-,Surrogate%20Compensation,Los%20Angeles%20and%20San%20Francisco.

Outrageous but these women should be charging $250,000 per kid plus $100,000 extra to be a wet nurse.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a friend from high school who is a surrogate. She's actually pregnant with surro baby #2. Her and her family (she has 2 kids) live on a farm and it pays the bills. She's religious and LOVES being pregnant. She has easy pregnancies and gives birth easily thus far. She told me she made 65 or 75k (I can't remember now).

I had 3 easy pregnancies. I had tons of energy and they didn't slow me down. I was never sick. My births were long, but easy. It's a pretty good side hustle.

I don't think this is unethical at all. If people were allowed to sell kidneys, people would be lining up to sell them. How is that preying on the poor any more than making them work in mines, as road construction workers or a myriad of physically difficult jobs.

If your friend is making $65,000/$75,000 from surrogacy, she is breaking the law and I hope both she and whoever is brokering these $$$$$ deals, as well as the couples buying these babies are caught and prosecuted and given stiff prison sentences.
This is immoral.

Depends on the state. In CA not illegal at all.

https://familytreesurrogacy.com/blog/surrogate-pay-california/#:~:text=a%20fair%20compensation.-,Surrogate%20Compensation,Los%20Angeles%20and%20San%20Francisco.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a friend from high school who is a surrogate. She's actually pregnant with surro baby #2. Her and her family (she has 2 kids) live on a farm and it pays the bills. She's religious and LOVES being pregnant. She has easy pregnancies and gives birth easily thus far. She told me she made 65 or 75k (I can't remember now).

I had 3 easy pregnancies. I had tons of energy and they didn't slow me down. I was never sick. My births were long, but easy. It's a pretty good side hustle.

I don't think this is unethical at all. If people were allowed to sell kidneys, people would be lining up to sell them. How is that preying on the poor any more than making them work in mines, as road construction workers or a myriad of physically difficult jobs.

If your friend is making $65,000/$75,000 from surrogacy, she is breaking the law and I hope both she and whoever is brokering these $$$$$ deals, as well as the couples buying these babies are caught and prosecuted and given stiff prison sentences.
This is immoral.

Depends on the state. In CA not illegal at all.

Anonymous wrote:I have a friend from high school who is a surrogate. She's actually pregnant with surro baby #2. Her and her family (she has 2 kids) live on a farm and it pays the bills. She's religious and LOVES being pregnant. She has easy pregnancies and gives birth easily thus far. She told me she made 65 or 75k (I can't remember now).

I had 3 easy pregnancies. I had tons of energy and they didn't slow me down. I was never sick. My births were long, but easy. It's a pretty good side hustle.

I don't think this is unethical at all. If people were allowed to sell kidneys, people would be lining up to sell them. How is that preying on the poor any more than making them work in mines, as road construction workers or a myriad of physically difficult jobs.

If your friend is making $65,000/$75,000 from surrogacy, she is breaking the law and I hope both she and whoever is brokering these $$$$$ deals, as well as the couples buying these babies are caught and prosecuted and given stiff prison sentences.
This is immoral.

I do think it’s questionable and I would never use a surrogate—but I also didn’t need one and I’m sure many surrogates think it’s a calling. In fact I’m sure it is a calling, for some women. So I certainly don’t think we need the government to outlaw it or anything, but more discussion about the harms is probably a good idea.

Anonymous wrote:I have a friend from high school who is a surrogate. She's actually pregnant with surro baby #2. Her and her family (she has 2 kids) live on a farm and it pays the bills. She's religious and LOVES being pregnant. She has easy pregnancies and gives birth easily thus far. She told me she made 65 or 75k (I can't remember now).

I had 3 easy pregnancies. I had tons of energy and they didn't slow me down. I was never sick. My births were long, but easy. It's a pretty good side hustle.

I don't think this is unethical at all. If people were allowed to sell kidneys, people would be lining up to sell them. How is that preying on the poor any more than making them work in mines, as road construction workers or a myriad of physically difficult jobs.

Selling body organs is illegal and a felony and surrogacy is tantamount to baby selling and should also be illegal and a felony. It is an odious practice that both barren and vain women use to exploit poor women.

*move away

Having a child shouldn’t be a side-hustle. Is there nothing in our society that’s above capitalism?

In the same way that we can’t sell our organs, for any reason, we shouldn’t be able to buy ourselves a pregnancy. Of course there are many sad situations where people want children and can’t, but we as a society need to heft away from the idea that we can buy anything that we want, including children.

I have a friend from high school who is a surrogate. She's actually pregnant with surro baby #2. Her and her family (she has 2 kids) live on a farm and it pays the bills. She's religious and LOVES being pregnant. She has easy pregnancies and gives birth easily thus far. She told me she made 65 or 75k (I can't remember now).

I had 3 easy pregnancies. I had tons of energy and they didn't slow me down. I was never sick. My births were long, but easy. It's a pretty good side hustle.

I don't think this is unethical at all. If people were allowed to sell kidneys, people would be lining up to sell them. How is that preying on the poor any more than making them work in mines, as road construction workers or a myriad of physically difficult jobs.

I think it's FAR more ethical to outsource pregnancy, than to outsource parenting... which is what a lot of people do just because they can financially afford it.

The use of another woman’s body – particularly in such a destructive manner – is a woman-on-woman crime.

Fine sure for the idea of non-remunerated out-of-the-goodness-of-her-heart surrogacy for couples with fertility issues, but the rest is exploiting the needy. No woman in her right mind chooses pregnancy as a job when she has other viable opportunities.