Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:18:29 you are not Catholic. No, you cannot wait to be baptized. It is not confirmation.

You can wait a few months, no problem at all.

Signed,

Someone born and raised in the midst of Catholic faith

You can wait and just pray that nothing happens to the baby in the meantime, being totally unprotected.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am having a similar problem. I am not lapsed but my extended family isn't practicing or they left the church. The two who are eligible--one is a convicted sex offender and the other is 8 years old. None of my friends I grew up with stayed catholic--the one or two who did are crazy and we don't get along really. Basically we are up a creek. I didn't realize finding a godparent would be so hard!

Since you are still a practicing Catholic, don't you have any friends at church that could be godparents? Are you active in any of the ministries where you've met other Catholics that you've become especially close to?
Worst case scenario, just ASK the priest. I am sure he can find someone who would love to be the godparent for your baby.

I go to mass and then leave. I just don't socialize and I am not involved. Not everyone has to be in 5 million ministries or use church as a friend outlet. I t really is personal time for me. I have a few people lined up, but unless a Camino friend comes through, the church has effectively rendered godparents as meaningless for my husband and me.

Anonymous wrote:I am having a similar problem. I am not lapsed but my extended family isn't practicing or they left the church. The two who are eligible--one is a convicted sex offender and the other is 8 years old. None of my friends I grew up with stayed catholic--the one or two who did are crazy and we don't get along really. Basically we are up a creek. I didn't realize finding a godparent would be so hard!

Since you are still a practicing Catholic, don't you have any friends at church that could be godparents? Are you active in any of the ministries where you've met other Catholics that you've become especially close to?
Worst case scenario, just ASK the priest. I am sure he can find someone who would love to be the godparent for your baby.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Born and raised Catholic here who is now Agnostic. DH was born/raised Lutheran and is Agnostic as well. My parents threw a fit that we didn't baptize DD. That's one thing I do not agree with the Catholic church. I do not believe an un-baptized child would go to hell if they die.

OP if you want to baptize them Catholic then you need to be in a Catholic church with Catholic godparents. I wasn't married in the Catholic church (but have all the other sacraments) so I couldn't be godparent to my nephew. They are VERY strict. You may also have to be a member of the congregation for a period of time before they will perform the baptism (unless there's a health issue with your child).

Do you mean that if the child is likely to die soon, then the church will bend the rules a little, to give the baby the chance to get to heaven?

I wonder if you need a note from the doctor or if the church will take the parents' word for it.

Yep. A wonderful kind priest baptized my baby after I came to him crying because she was very ill. (Heart defects and uncontrolled epilepsy). He did it right then and there with his secretary as a witness. My daughter is amazingly healthy now and I am still grateful to that priest.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:18:29 you are not Catholic. No, you cannot wait to be baptized. It is not confirmation.

You can wait a few months, no problem at all.

Signed,

Someone born and raised in the midst of Catholic faith

You can wait and just pray that nothing happens to the baby in the meantime, being totally unprotected.

Anonymous wrote:I am having a similar problem. I am not lapsed but my extended family isn't practicing or they left the church. The two who are eligible--one is a convicted sex offender and the other is 8 years old. None of my friends I grew up with stayed catholic--the one or two who did are crazy and we don't get along really. Basically we are up a creek. I didn't realize finding a godparent would be so hard!

But the Church doesn't care if they're crazy or a convicted sex offender, as long as they are Catholics in good standing, which you say they are. . If you want the best from a religious perspective for your child, you'll ask these people and be grateful if they agree.

Anonymous wrote:Born and raised Catholic here who is now Agnostic. DH was born/raised Lutheran and is Agnostic as well. My parents threw a fit that we didn't baptize DD. That's one thing I do not agree with the Catholic church. I do not believe an un-baptized child would go to hell if they die.

OP if you want to baptize them Catholic then you need to be in a Catholic church with Catholic godparents. I wasn't married in the Catholic church (but have all the other sacraments) so I couldn't be godparent to my nephew. They are VERY strict. You may also have to be a member of the congregation for a period of time before they will perform the baptism (unless there's a health issue with your child).

Do you mean that if the child is likely to die soon, then the church will bend the rules a little, to give the baby the chance to get to heaven?

I wonder if you need a note from the doctor or if the church will take the parents' word for it.

Born and raised Catholic here who is now Agnostic. DH was born/raised Lutheran and is Agnostic as well. My parents threw a fit that we didn't baptize DD. That's one thing I do not agree with the Catholic church. I do not believe an un-baptized child would go to hell if they die.

OP if you want to baptize them Catholic then you need to be in a Catholic church with Catholic godparents. I wasn't married in the Catholic church (but have all the other sacraments) so I couldn't be godparent to my nephew. They are VERY strict. You may also have to be a member of the congregation for a period of time before they will perform the baptism (unless there's a health issue with your child).

I am having a similar problem. I am not lapsed but my extended family isn't practicing or they left the church. The two who are eligible--one is a convicted sex offender and the other is 8 years old. None of my friends I grew up with stayed catholic--the one or two who did are crazy and we don't get along really. Basically we are up a creek. I didn't realize finding a godparent would be so hard!

We had our older siblings, who were willing to fly in, under the pressure of grandparents to choose them over friends (some of whom were pretty devout).

"Family is forever". We needed a letter from their parish that they were "in good standing" at their churches.

Turned out, they each needed a tune-up. You can have 1 in good standing and 1 "+1".

One sibling was sure a family member on the other side would lie is a letter and say they attended mass at that parish (Shocker-the priest said, "Come to church"). The other also has trouble getting a letter because they did a few things "rogue".

Neither of our siblings had a church wedding.

This is why grandmas make a big deal about these crazy details. They can come up later.

Totally respect the choices of my other family members to worship (or not) in a way that works for their family.

For the next kid we went with the people to whom it would mean the most, spiritually. That was a better choice.

The Godparent is responsible for praying for your child and that's it. As the priest and he will find you someone. I'm sure there are some lovely old ladies in the church who would be delighted!

Anonymous wrote:For all you folks having trouble finding any active Catholic friends to be your kids' godparents, I have a secret to tell you. Pssssst...I know where they're all hiding!


Seriously, don't wait until you want your kid baptized to come back to church.

Yes! We have had a few parishioners befriend new families and later act as Confirmation sponsors, etc. I am active in my church and enjoy meeting new families. I would be honored if a family I had befriended asked me to be a godparent.

Anonymous wrote:If you are not an active, documented member of a church, they won't baptize your kid anyways.

???

If you are not an active, documented member of a church, they won't baptize your kid anyways.

We are lapsed Catholics and my son's godparents aren't. They however are the only people we wanted as godparents so we held our christening at an Espicopalian church. Everyone we wanted was involved and it was a sweet ceremony.

My son and I don't go to church regularly but do go and we definitely discuss religion at home.

This was the best solution for our family; hopefully you can find one that works for you.