What I don’t like is plenty of people confuse a welcome party (optional as I understand it, and usually by people with higher economic means) with the rehearsal dinner (only for the members of wedding party and dates if they have them.) Isn’t that happening a bit?

Welcome dinner is right after the actual rehearsal and includes out of town guests. 2-3-ish hours, dinner with open bar, no tickets or limits. Can be sit down, stations or incredibly heavy hors d'oeuvres, but yes, you are feeding people an actual meal. Decor can be the place (if a garden or nice restaurant) and/or you can decorate with flowers or limited color plan, but not go overboard.

2 weddings down, 1 to go as far as our kids. One MOG, one MOB, last one I don't see happening for a while, and my money is on an elopmenr, but we will do what she wants

I did one and invited everyone (most of our guests were from out of town). We did open bar but just beer, wine, and soda. It was at a pizzeria so we had pizza and salad, then a fruit platter and some mini pastries for dessert.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a welcome party. I served dinner and had drinks. You are right, it was a mini reception. I limited it to immediate family and out of town guests.

I’m older but the kids i know aren’t old enough for marriage yet so not into the recent wedding scene.

When do you do rehearsal and rehearsal dinner then? Is Welcome Dinner in place of Rehearsal dinner? Do bride and groom just not attend welcome dinner?

how does it work with rehearsal dinner?

We did a very simple outdoor "fiesta" with Chipotle catering because we had lots of families with kids on Thursday night, the more formal Rehearsal Dinner on Friday night (paid for by groom's family) for bridal party and parents, siblings and grandparents, and then Saturday wedding and reception. We had housed all of the out-of-town family and bridal party, so stocked their kitchens with breakfast casseroles, bagels, etc. for Sunday morning. No brunch.

Anonymous wrote:I had a welcome party. I served dinner and had drinks. You are right, it was a mini reception. I limited it to immediate family and out of town guests.

I’m older but the kids i know aren’t old enough for marriage yet so not into the recent wedding scene.

When do you do rehearsal and rehearsal dinner then? Is Welcome Dinner in place of Rehearsal dinner? Do bride and groom just not attend welcome dinner?

how does it work with rehearsal dinner?

I had a welcome party. I served dinner and had drinks. You are right, it was a mini reception. I limited it to immediate family and out of town guests.

Anonymous wrote:Most welcome parties I've been to were post-dinner and just had an open bar. Some had snacks and/or dessert.

I’m no expert, but the ones I have been to were like this, and usually held after the rehearsal dinner (which was a restaurant dinner for a much smaller group) so maybe 8-10pm. My favorite ones were basically an open bar at the hotel where most guests were staying, they were very easygoing and a nice way to start the weekend.

I just went to one. It was at a wine bar and was 2-3 hours long. It wasn’t a huge wedding. I would guess 50-60 people came to it. It was at the beach in the south so they had a local place serve heavy apps:

Fried shrimp skewer
Little tiny thing of mac and cheese
Chicken and waffles (small amount on a skewer)
Some sort of goat cheese tart
Tiny little thing of shrimp and grits
Tiny little banana pudding
Some kind of cake

Bar was one white wine, one red wine and a few types of beer. There was tea and water over by the food.

It was lovely.

We went to a destination wedding at Four Seasons Scottsdale. They had restaurant suggestions for open nights, a welcome party the night before the wedding, and a brunch the morning after. The welcome had passed bites, places to sit or stand to eat, and bars.

There is no minimum or maximum, just what works for you and feels welcoming for your guests. You don't need to impress anyone with extravagance.

It all depends on how many people are flying in. If less than 20, take them to a restaurant and have dinner, if 60 then just soft drinks and snacks. You'll be toasting with champagne at wedding so no need to do it twice.

We went to one last weekend that was done well. I would say 75% of those in attendance had traveled for the wedding (where bride grew up and grandparents who were unable to travel lived). So the groom's parents hosted one as a "everyone has traveled we should get together instead of people fending for themselves". Open bar with wine, beer , sodas, and things like iced tea and lemonade. It was all passed apps and some stations of meat and cheese and things like that. Honestly it was perfect.

Anonymous wrote:Tell me about welcome parties that you have attended or hosted. 1) Did you limit drinks? The venue suggested giving each attendee two tickets for drinks and after that it's self pay. 2) Did you bring in decor, if so, what? 3) Did you have appetizers passed or set out? * We are trying to limit the cost and it seems like it could turn into a mini reception.

No drinks, just water, juice and coffee and few appetizers to meet and greet. A welcome sign but no fancy decor needed. Obviously you can knock yourself out going extra, that's legal.

Anonymous wrote:We had a welcome dinner, but it’s only for the people who flew in from out of town. No, we don’t limit drinks - nobody is getting drunk and making a fool of themselves. It’s a sit down dinner. People order from a menu we’ve arranged with the restaurant.

This makes sense to me. I can't understand how so many people are saying drink tickets are tacky but only serving appetizers is not. But then I'm from an Italian family and we are more interested in eating than drinking. I wouldn't limit drinks either because we're not big drinkers.

You do not invite guests to your event and charge them. If you can not afford an open bar, then just serve what you can afford. General custom has become you invite the bridal party and out of town guests to the rehearsal dinner. Just do that.