Move to a more rural area. The “always on” culture only exists in urban job markets, and DC is even another level from that.

I’m sorry for what you’re going through. If I were in your shoes, I would move yesterday - to a slower-paced, more value-filled area.

Very sorry, you have my sympathy. Is there something you have interest in where you can get a cert that would refresh your resume? FWIW, there are some high credentialed candidates with years of experience in the same boat. My only advice is to do something different, with regards to your application strategy. It may mean more subjective means, like networking, online and in-person. Many people get jobs this way via their relationships. You will have to get creative and think outside of the box in this job market.

Get fired. I know this sounds extreme but you are working two jobs right now and the kids need you. Do 40 hours. Let boss push back. Get fired/severance. Have you done serious financial accounting? Can you borrow from yourself (401k)? Do the kids get SSI? How far can you stretch on what you have? I was a widow before kids and I know what it feels like. I also have teens and one of their friends attempted. It's heart breaking. Live your life for you kids. Cry, scream. Throw something. Then do accounting. See what you find out.

OP I don't have any real advice, but I'm so sorry. Also wondering if you're fed. My job has been affected by the Trump admin and I've been torn between continuing to perform highly and giving 50%. I have a feeling that you would continue to perform like this even after moving to another job unless your schedule is made for you like in retail. Just know that if you're a fed, it's so hard to fire you. You can pull back you just have to be willing to piss people off. But there's no reason you can't put in your 8 and go home.