Anonymous wrote:I also find it super awkward when people don't share. I am not entirely sure about the logic but I think people want to avoid having their current colleagues say negative things about them to the new employer, and I guess they're hoping they'll just be forgotten when they leave and people won't bother to track down where they've gone.

SuPer!

Anonymous wrote:My last employer required it. That’s because they wanted to sue anyone who went to a competitor or someone in the same space. Apparently when that company acquired my original employer, the new employment agreement they made us sign included that requirement. Fortunately I was not going to a company in the same space, but I heard they had gone after a low-level marketing person who did, and her new employer as well. Needless to say, they were a-holes.

What document did you sign agreeing to this?

Anonymous wrote:It can be awkward not to share where you are going, but sometimes it's for the best. However, when not sharing where you are headed, it's a good idea to provide bosses/coworkers with goodbye gifts. Nothing too elaborate: selection of homemade jams and preserves (maybe in a small hamper if you're feeling generous), gourmet cheese wheels, etc.

lol no

I think it’s weird to be secretive. What is the reason? Sounds like drama.

I work in a job that is very ideological and when people do this (rare) they are usually switching sides.

Anonymous wrote:A normal person makes up something to say in response to the obvious question everone will ask. It doesn't have to be true. "I'm going to spend a few weeks thinking about what I want to do next" or "My mom needs some help for a bit" or "I'm superstitious and I want to wait until I start my new job to say anything."

Literally anything except "Nunya." Being weird about leaving means the last thing they'll remember about you is how weird you were.

Oh, no -- People I'm never going to see again will think I'm weird? What ever will I do?

Well, everyone badgered me when I resigned, and I never told a soul. They had a goodbye lunch for me, and for a full hour, people tried to guess where I was going and what I was doing. No one was even close.

Anyhoo, years later when I decided to go back to "the real world," those same people were my reference. I didn't hesitate to serve up their names, and I didn't even think to give them a heads-up. Yeppers, I was hired. I'm weird? That's obvious to everyone.

I didn’t because 1) I didn’t really like my coworkers and didn’t want to share any personal info with them and 2) my boss was trying to get me to stay and I didn’t want to give her any more talking points (e.g. “I heard new company isn’t doing well…”)

I went to a niche start-up, I did share the company name and no one has ever heard of it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never name it. None of their business.

I do know of a few cases (other people, not me) where previous employer did know an exec at someone's new employer and tried to poison reputation of the new employee at the new employer.

+1.

There were two times in my life where I left because I hated the job and despised my manager. I was being polite by keeping it to myself.

Should I have said: "Actually, I'm taking a 10K pay cut just to get away from Risa, who happens to be a lazy manager that strolls in every day at 10, reads the news and her socials until lunch, goes to lunch, comes back at 2, 'works' til 4 and then, leaves yet somehow manages to crap all over everybody about their low production"?

Nobody's suggesting you say why. Only where.

Anonymous wrote:My last employer required it. That’s because they wanted to sue anyone who went to a competitor or someone in the same space. Apparently when that company acquired my original employer, the new employment agreement they made us sign included that requirement. Fortunately I was not going to a company in the same space, but I heard they had gone after a low-level marketing person who did, and her new employer as well. Needless to say, they were a-holes.

"Required it"

LMFAO. They arent the police and cant compel you to do diddily. I'd have told them to eff off.

My last employer required it. That’s because they wanted to sue anyone who went to a competitor or someone in the same space. Apparently when that company acquired my original employer, the new employment agreement they made us sign included that requirement. Fortunately I was not going to a company in the same space, but I heard they had gone after a low-level marketing person who did, and her new employer as well. Needless to say, they were a-holes.

Anonymous wrote:I never name it. None of their business.

I do know of a few cases (other people, not me) where previous employer did know an exec at someone's new employer and tried to poison reputation of the new employee at the new employer.

+1.

There were two times in my life where I left because I hated the job and despised my manager. I was being polite by keeping it to myself.

Should I have said: "Actually, I'm taking a 10K pay cut just to get away from Risa, who happens to be a lazy manager that strolls in every day at 10, reads the news and her socials until lunch, goes to lunch, comes back at 2, 'works' til 4 and then, leaves yet somehow manages to crap all over everybody about their low production"?

Anonymous wrote:I never name it. None of their business.

I do know of a few cases (other people, not me) where previous employer did know an exec at someone's new employer and tried to poison reputation of the new employee at the new employer.

Because of this
I worked at a super toxic place and no one said for that reason