Anonymous wrote:Your kids won’t miss that because they will never have grown up with the big family holidays that you are remembering.

+1 I had a large, close extended family growing up but my parents preferred just the five of us for holidays. We had our own traditions. Fast forward 20+ years and now I do get together with my siblings, their families and my parents for Christmas, so we have the large gathering you're looking for even though we didn't grow up with it.

I’m trying to find the world’s smallest violin so I can play the world’s shortest song for you. You have so much more than most people in the world. Wait…Scratch that. You have more than most Americans!

We had a big family, and a string of tragedies, and now we are very small. OP, I don’t think there is anything wrong with your pangs, but I would just say enjoy all the good things you can right now. If you want to expand your circle in the future, you can do that.

I hear you OP.
We lived 6000 miles away from my parents in our childrens' early years.
One day they had seen an episode of Arthur or similar on TV and when it ended they turned to me and said "Can we get some grandparents?"
So I booked us on a flight to see my parents who they had completely forgotten.

Anonymous wrote:Real class is appreciating what you have and leaning into it. Own your family and make celebrations you want big or small.

Class?

Odd choice of words. This conversation is not about social status.

It is good you realize this now. You can do something about it.

Move closer to family or close friends. Encourage holiday traditions within your own nuclear family (so your kids have that).

People do matter more than money or status. That is a healthy thing to grasp, and better now than on your deathbed.

(Last but not least, don’t romanticize big families. They come with baggage: such as chaos and drama. Try to nurture relationships with people you would choose to hold close.)