Anonymous wrote:The place I used to work did not allow +1 and it wasn’t a budget thing. Apparently it was so people could get drunk and fool around with other people.

Does this really happen? I have been to many holiday parties and I have never seen (including drunk men) doing anything inappropriate with female staff. In fact it's the only place where I have seen drunk men 100% sober when it comes to being inappropriate with female colleagues.

I don’t like company events with plus ones invited. In my mind it’s like bringing your spouse to your high school reunion. No one wants to talk to your spouse and she or he doesn’t know anyone. And if your employees have young kids they have to get a babysitter. My company just started opening its weeknight holiday party up to spouses and almost no one brings a spouse.

Normally the plus one guest is the spouse or fiance. Normally young people choose not to bring their boyfriend or girlfriend in my small company.

We had a workday lunch this year and people enjoyed it. It was an escape from the workday only with employees rather than an evening dinner that eats into employees’ free time

My husband and I both work at small consulting firms and both do holiday dinners with a +1. I think it is the right thing to do. If a spouse finds it boring, they don’t have to come. But if you do t want to invite a +1, I’d say make it a workday lunch instead.

OP, I hear you. As a spouse, here is my advice ...

- Celebrate the "Holiday Cheer" during the work day. Make it a holiday lunch, pause your business and use 1/2 of the work day to take the office out for lunch or get it catered. It does not need to be fancy and you do not need to invite the spouse. I am sure, most of the SOs will not mind. Also, your employees can attend in their regular office attire, no need to dress up in formals for a holiday party.

- It will save our household - the cost of babysitter, evening formal clothes and accessories, drycleaner, hair color and cut, gas, parking etc.

- I depend on my DH to come home and help me with childcare, petcare, housecare. So, if he has to go solo to attend corporate dinner, I will not be very happy.

- A small digital amazon gift-card to the wife or family will be appreciated, but not necessary.

Another option - Gift card and a day-off.

I haven't had an employer with a holiday party in 20 years. The working world was so different back in the olden days.

As the plus 1 spouse at my husband’s office holiday party on a Friday night, please don’t. Plan a lunch during work hours. Don’t set the expectation that the employees’ partners have to attend and get sitters, miss other holiday parties, etc. I hate this obligation and I really have to attend or it looks bad for my spouse.

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Anonymous wrote:Of course we do. Unless it is something right after work by the office or at lunch why not a plus one.

My holiday party is at a fancy hotel, suits, dinner open bar, dancing, gift baskets. on a Saturday night usually around 8pm

Kinda weird not to invite a guest

That's more than a holiday dinner. That's a full night out lavish party night out. Holiday work dinner for me is a 5:30 pm dinner at a restaurant near the office, no spouses. Everyone leaves by 7:30 pm.

How does that show appreciation to the actual people who make it all happen? My old firm sent gift baskets, Omaha steaks, gift cards etc. each year to the spouses directly. They are ones who cover while we work late. Men or women Spouses were inviged to Holiday party. Female spouses got Flowers when they gave birth. At Holiday party we even one year sent Limos to pick up and drop off spouses. Another company at offsites whole family invited, we had family picnics, take you take your kids to work day, family baseball outings, even one place a family holiday party bring the kids.

The workers get paychecks. The family and kids are one who work unpaid. Heck we let Moms and Dads come and one year a 24 year old single girl we recognized her friend who came who watches her dog on business trips and when she works late. We invited her to party and sent her a gift basket.

That seems very 1950s. Not sure where you work, but I would say 1/3 of my coworkers are unmarried/don’t have a partner and maybe 1/2 don’t have kids. Maybe your firm poops gold bricks, but I wouldn’t waste a company budget line item on someone’s dog sitter.

We all worked 50-60 hour weeks and I travel a lot and take clients out. I often get home at 11 pm and back out the door by 645 am. And business trips all the time. Who do you think made it happen when I had little kids at home? Single, married, gay, living at home it ain’t the workers making it happen

Maybe the greater gift would be better work-life balance?

Not really my job paid over double prior easy job which allowed my wife to stay home with kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Of course we do. Unless it is something right after work by the office or at lunch why not a plus one.

My holiday party is at a fancy hotel, suits, dinner open bar, dancing, gift baskets. on a Saturday night usually around 8pm

Kinda weird not to invite a guest

That's more than a holiday dinner. That's a full night out lavish party night out. Holiday work dinner for me is a 5:30 pm dinner at a restaurant near the office, no spouses. Everyone leaves by 7:30 pm.

How does that show appreciation to the actual people who make it all happen? My old firm sent gift baskets, Omaha steaks, gift cards etc. each year to the spouses directly. They are ones who cover while we work late. Men or women Spouses were inviged to Holiday party. Female spouses got Flowers when they gave birth. At Holiday party we even one year sent Limos to pick up and drop off spouses. Another company at offsites whole family invited, we had family picnics, take you take your kids to work day, family baseball outings, even one place a family holiday party bring the kids.

The workers get paychecks. The family and kids are one who work unpaid. Heck we let Moms and Dads come and one year a 24 year old single girl we recognized her friend who came who watches her dog on business trips and when she works late. We invited her to party and sent her a gift basket.

That seems very 1950s. Not sure where you work, but I would say 1/3 of my coworkers are unmarried/don’t have a partner and maybe 1/2 don’t have kids. Maybe your firm poops gold bricks, but I wouldn’t waste a company budget line item on someone’s dog sitter.

We all worked 50-60 hour weeks and I travel a lot and take clients out. I often get home at 11 pm and back out the door by 645 am. And business trips all the time. Who do you think made it happen when I had little kids at home? Single, married, gay, living at home it ain’t the workers making it happen

Maybe the greater gift would be better work-life balance?