Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is so incredibly sad. They found the elderly man in his submerged car in Lorton. My heart is breaking for this family:

https://wtop.com/fairfax-county/2025/12/missing-78-year-old-fairfax-county-man-found-dead-inside-submerged-car/

I'm so glad that he didn't kill someone. The family is irresponsible for letting him drive. We took my dad's car when he turned 75 because of eyesight issues, his memory was perfect but he was a risk on the roads.

Do you know the story? Friends of ours actually reported their father to the DMV and APS because he refused to stop driving. They suspended his license until he took a test and he PASSED somehow. He continued reckless driving until he got in an accident.

We have doctors monitoring my MIL's skills needed for driving (reflexes, etc) and the geriatric nurse who checks on her does the same. They cannot force her to take a driving test unless they see something concerning. She has already threatened us to scare us away from taking keys or disabling her car and she has the means, the obsessiveness and the rage to follow through with hiring a lawyer. The neighbors know if they have any concerns to report her to the department of motor vehicles.

The DMV needs to require road tests starting at a certain age.

Putting aside taking the keys away...hide an Air Tag in your parent's car. At least this way if they won't use their cell phone, you can track their progress when they leave, and in this case, probably take action far sooner when you see your parents clearly going in the wrong direction.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is so incredibly sad. They found the elderly man in his submerged car in Lorton. My heart is breaking for this family:

https://wtop.com/fairfax-county/2025/12/missing-78-year-old-fairfax-county-man-found-dead-inside-submerged-car/

It's sad that the family knew he was having memory issues and let him drive anyway. It is sad that he died but preventable. What would have been a lot sadder is if he killed an innocent victim or victims.

I think families are also confused regarding how much to intervene. When my dad's cognition plummeted, we hid the keys. Full stop. Some get mixed messages on "respecting elderly dignity" and don't integrate teh importance of balancing safety

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But even if they go lost, what killed this couple? In Texas it seems unlikely they froze in their car. They weren't there long enough to starve. How did they die?

Where they got lost in New Mexico was the high plains/high desert. Night temperatures are often extremely cold and below freezing at this time of year and they were probably not dressed for that.

Also, dehydration because it's cold and dry weather there. They probably didn't have water in the car.

Anonymous wrote:This is so incredibly sad. They found the elderly man in his submerged car in Lorton. My heart is breaking for this family:

https://wtop.com/fairfax-county/2025/12/missing-78-year-old-fairfax-county-man-found-dead-inside-submerged-car/

It's sad that the family knew he was having memory issues and let him drive anyway. It is sad that he died but preventable. What would have been a lot sadder is if he killed an innocent victim or victims.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is so incredibly sad. They found the elderly man in his submerged car in Lorton. My heart is breaking for this family:

https://wtop.com/fairfax-county/2025/12/missing-78-year-old-fairfax-county-man-found-dead-inside-submerged-car/

I'm so glad that he didn't kill someone. The family is irresponsible for letting him drive. We took my dad's car when he turned 75 because of eyesight issues, his memory was perfect but he was a risk on the roads.

Your father ALLOWED you to take his car.

The family isn't necessarily "letting him drive," they have no way to actually stop it.

Anonymous wrote:But even if they go lost, what killed this couple? In Texas it seems unlikely they froze in their car. They weren't there long enough to starve. How did they die?

Where they got lost in New Mexico was the high plains/high desert. Night temperatures are often extremely cold and below freezing at this time of year and they were probably not dressed for that.

Anonymous wrote:This is so incredibly sad. They found the elderly man in his submerged car in Lorton. My heart is breaking for this family:

https://wtop.com/fairfax-county/2025/12/missing-78-year-old-fairfax-county-man-found-dead-inside-submerged-car/

I'm so glad that he didn't kill someone. The family is irresponsible for letting him drive. We took my dad's car when he turned 75 because of eyesight issues, his memory was perfect but he was a risk on the roads.

Anonymous wrote:Old people in their 80s left Thanksgiving to drive an hour and a half I think. They got turned around and were found dead. Dementia. Old people should not be driving.

3 hour drive after dinner (so in the dark) on roads in the middle of nowhere with no phones. So yes, got lost, confused, no way to find help.

But even if they go lost, what killed this couple? In Texas it seems unlikely they froze in their car. They weren't there long enough to starve. How did they die?

Anonymous wrote:This is so incredibly sad. They found the elderly man in his submerged car in Lorton. My heart is breaking for this family:

https://wtop.com/fairfax-county/2025/12/missing-78-year-old-fairfax-county-man-found-dead-inside-submerged-car/

It’s sad, he had a good long life however

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At this point doesn’t everyone have some sort of location tracking on their car or cell phone? I would drop an air tag in my parents car, if nothing else.

Last Christmas my mom made a stop in Woodbridge before coming here. She somehow turned her phone onto airplane mode so I couldn’t call or track her. 3 hours later she pulled over in DC. She’d be driving back and further over the bridges. Someone helped her turn her phone back on. She still didn’t call me but I was stalking her so I saw it cone back in. DH had to drive me to go get her. I was terrified. Was about to post a silver alert. She doesn’t even think she has dementia btw.

Yes, just like all these people who drive like they are 30 and are in hard denial they aren’t 30 anymore. I see it too often! People who are 80 think they are still sooooo competent

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have zero intention of ever getting in a driverless car. I’m not elderly either. I’ll hire a car service or stay home. My mom drove until she died at 86. No wrecks or accidents her whole life. The last 15 years she no longer drove at night and short distances on non-interstate roads.

Atlanta has the Waymo and it’s pretty awesome. You’re lucky your mom didn’t have any issues with her driving. So many elderly do.

I hate it when people are like “but my grandma!” Well she is an exception which only proves the rule

Anonymous wrote:I have zero intention of ever getting in a driverless car. I’m not elderly either. I’ll hire a car service or stay home. My mom drove until she died at 86. No wrecks or accidents her whole life. The last 15 years she no longer drove at night and short distances on non-interstate roads.

You are elderly in spirit
Car service isn’t very commonly used, not sure why, probably expensive.
Waymo should get cheaper and cheaper as the years go by just like it happened with cell phones etc.
there are also options to live walking distance to grocery stores but ho will you get the dr?
It’s still some sort of cab service