Anonymous
09/16/2025 20:29
Subject: Aging parents - what am I looking at financially?
Anonymous wrote:New to this forum. I am 51 and parents are both in their 80s. They have outlived both of their parents. Despite any number of ailments, the seem to be in reasonably good health at this point in time. My mom has long-term-care insurance. My father does not and cannot qualify. They have very limited financial resources.
After paying for many years of private school for our kids they will soon be in college and I am beginning to see the light at the end of this tunnel financially. Now I find myself wondering what the expenses will be for my parents as they age and if I'll ever be able to retire.
Does LTC insurance cover assisted living? Does Medicaid? What will happen if my father doesn't need skilled nursing but needs assisted living? Is this something people pay out of pocket? I did a lot of research on Medicaid and the spend down several years ago and tried to discuss putting together a strategy with my parents and they wouldn't listen. They say they "don't want to be a burden." Both of their parents died at an earlier age and were financially secure so they never had to rely on my parents for financial help or care.
I know every situation is different and i'm just scratching the surface here but is there a way to gage what I might be facing in terms of financial commitment moving into the next 10 years?
Why are you assuming your parents will need a certain level of care? If they are still reasonably healthy in their 80s i’d say that’s pretty good. Do they take care of themselves or is that just luck? They need to be eating right and doing some form of exercise every day as well as have a social life (good for the brain). Not all old people become completely incapacitated and need 24/7 care. Taking care of yourself is as much for your kids (so they don’t have this burden) as it is for yourself.
Anonymous
09/16/2025 18:34
Subject: Re:Aging parents - what am I looking at financially?
Sadly, we all save for retirement with dreams, but it ends up going to nursing home/assisted living.
Your parents will pay out of pocket until they run out of money. Then either you pay, or Medicare/medicaid pays. This is how it works now, but with cuts it may not be an option.
In order to try to protect some of the estate, I care for my parents myself and they are in their home. But that means I give up the opportunity to work full time. 5/7 caregivers we’ve hired have robbed or exploited my parents financially, to the extent two are prison. Money will never be recovered. I tend not to use caregivers.
Your parents will pay out of pocket until they run out of money. Then either you pay, or Medicare/medicaid pays. This is how it works now, but with cuts it may not be an option.
In order to try to protect some of the estate, I care for my parents myself and they are in their home. But that means I give up the opportunity to work full time. 5/7 caregivers we’ve hired have robbed or exploited my parents financially, to the extent two are prison. Money will never be recovered. I tend not to use caregivers.
Anonymous
09/16/2025 17:39
Subject: Aging parents - what am I looking at financially?
Medicaid only pays for skilled nursing care, not assisted living. I think it’s foolish, as skilled nursing care is much more expensive, but it is what it is.