Anonymous
05/12/2025 18:26
Subject: Chemo patient off ventilator, but talking gibberish
Anonymous wrote:Why is the parent NOT WITH THEIR CHILD!!
Stop judging. For all you know they have other kids, no family nearby, a job without sick days.
Is there any situation in which DCUM suspends scathing judgement!
Anonymous
05/12/2025 16:17
Subject: Chemo patient off ventilator, but talking gibberish
Anonymous wrote:Why is the parent NOT WITH THEIR CHILD!!
OP already stated parents are divorced and do not have healthy communication. On top of seemingly poor hospital communication in a complex situation.
But my kids has been in the hospital several times and I always feel so badly for the kids on their own, but many parents cannot take endless leave and/or are in hourly work situations, have other kids at home, etc. Obviously this is a very serious situation, but many patients/kids or not don't have a full time guardian with them.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 15:09
Subject: Chemo patient off ventilator, but talking gibberish
This is a nightmare situation. I would put pressure on the withholding parent with whatever I had (contact with in-laws, etc) and really go there and ask. Maybe with a lawyer.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 15:05
Subject: Chemo patient off ventilator, but talking gibberish
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Is the parent not with their child 24/7? Can they not ask to speak with the doctor in charge?
Parents are divorced, each is there half the time but other parent is weird and won't collaborate or share information. Hospital is in NY too and said certain records cannot be disclosed due to child privacy laws for children ages 9+!!!! Can.you.imagine. having a child being treated for leukemia, or in ICU on a ventilator suddenly and hearing that? I think a doctor passing through is rare. This hospital seems like hell.
Call you lawyer is the co-parent is endangering the hospitalized daughter's life. Using a small girl's life and cancer suffering as a weapon against the ex is unconscionable!
I do believe the other parent has a personality disorder. Not sure if it's antisocial, borderline, both. It is possible children have been severely neglected for years. Like, mom not home till nighttime, a kid not in school for few years, CPS there a lot, etc. Sad situation before this situation. Poor child.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 15:02
Subject: Chemo patient off ventilator, but talking gibberish
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Sounds like she is delirious. Parents should text the team “larla seems to be is delirious and we are requesting a psych or whatever other service does these in that hospital) consult (psychiatry generally does these evals inpatient though in reality it’s a medical/neuro issue.)
if they say no, reply “are you saying she is not delirious or are you declining a consult for a delirious patient?”
This is terrible advice. This is not a psych issue.
I think your role in this situation is to be the friend who listens and not the friend who gives advice. If you want to do something helpful, buy your friend food or something.
They are asking my advice in this case. It's a close friend, but out of state.
It's so bad, the response from a worker was a blurb about peripheral neuropathy - copied and pasted from internet or I don't know. They showed it to me. As if that affects speech. .
I suggested they ask to speak with a neurologist. I pray this is temporary and can resolve. Hug your kids you all.
Why are they asking your advice, do you have a medical background?
They did not ask me how to treat, they asked me what to do as a parent when their child was basically in a 3-day coma and has been talking in gibberish a few days since regaining consciousness.
And your answer should be “that sounds so scary, I am so sorry. I’d ask the doctors and nurses what they think but I’m sure it’s temporary. Can I send you dinner tonight?”
Thats basically what I did say. Any other concerns maam?
Anonymous
05/12/2025 13:04
Subject: Chemo patient off ventilator, but talking gibberish
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Is the parent not with their child 24/7? Can they not ask to speak with the doctor in charge?
Parents are divorced, each is there half the time but other parent is weird and won't collaborate or share information. Hospital is in NY too and said certain records cannot be disclosed due to child privacy laws for children ages 9+!!!! Can.you.imagine. having a child being treated for leukemia, or in ICU on a ventilator suddenly and hearing that? I think a doctor passing through is rare. This hospital seems like hell.
Call you lawyer is the co-parent is endangering the hospitalized daughter's life. Using a small girl's life and cancer suffering as a weapon against the ex is unconscionable!
It sounds like the parents are unable to be in the same room (even if it means spending time with their possibly dying daughter) and refuse to speak even if it’s to share medical updates about their possibly dying daughter. I’d say the parents that the OP is friends with should be told, by the OP, that she should stay by her daughter’s bedside even if the ex doesn’t want her there. Unless there is a restraining order in place, it’s a free country, and both parents need to grow up and fast.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 13:02
Subject: Chemo patient off ventilator, but talking gibberish
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Sounds like she is delirious. Parents should text the team “larla seems to be is delirious and we are requesting a psych or whatever other service does these in that hospital) consult (psychiatry generally does these evals inpatient though in reality it’s a medical/neuro issue.)
if they say no, reply “are you saying she is not delirious or are you declining a consult for a delirious patient?”
This is terrible advice. This is not a psych issue.
I think your role in this situation is to be the friend who listens and not the friend who gives advice. If you want to do something helpful, buy your friend food or something.
They are asking my advice in this case. It's a close friend, but out of state.
It's so bad, the response from a worker was a blurb about peripheral neuropathy - copied and pasted from internet or I don't know. They showed it to me. As if that affects speech. .
I suggested they ask to speak with a neurologist. I pray this is temporary and can resolve. Hug your kids you all.
Why are they asking your advice, do you have a medical background?
They did not ask me how to treat, they asked me what to do as a parent when their child was basically in a 3-day coma and has been talking in gibberish a few days since regaining consciousness.
And your answer should be “that sounds so scary, I am so sorry. I’d ask the doctors and nurses what they think but I’m sure it’s temporary. Can I send you dinner tonight?”
Anonymous
05/12/2025 12:30
Subject: Chemo patient off ventilator, but talking gibberish
ICU delirium. It's very common and not talked about by doctors very much. I'm so sorry. Hopefully it will resolved in a few days.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 12:27
Subject: Chemo patient off ventilator, but talking gibberish
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Is the parent not with their child 24/7? Can they not ask to speak with the doctor in charge?
Parents are divorced, each is there half the time but other parent is weird and won't collaborate or share information. Hospital is in NY too and said certain records cannot be disclosed due to child privacy laws for children ages 9+!!!! Can.you.imagine. having a child being treated for leukemia, or in ICU on a ventilator suddenly and hearing that? I think a doctor passing through is rare. This hospital seems like hell.
Call you lawyer is the co-parent is endangering the hospitalized daughter's life. Using a small girl's life and cancer suffering as a weapon against the ex is unconscionable!
Anonymous
05/12/2025 12:20
Subject: Chemo patient off ventilator, but talking gibberish
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Sounds like she is delirious. Parents should text the team “larla seems to be is delirious and we are requesting a psych or whatever other service does these in that hospital) consult (psychiatry generally does these evals inpatient though in reality it’s a medical/neuro issue.)
if they say no, reply “are you saying she is not delirious or are you declining a consult for a delirious patient?”
This is terrible advice. This is not a psych issue.
I think your role in this situation is to be the friend who listens and not the friend who gives advice. If you want to do something helpful, buy your friend food or something.
They are asking my advice in this case. It's a close friend, but out of state.
It's so bad, the response from a worker was a blurb about peripheral neuropathy - copied and pasted from internet or I don't know. They showed it to me. As if that affects speech. .
I suggested they ask to speak with a neurologist. I pray this is temporary and can resolve. Hug your kids you all.
Why are they asking your advice, do you have a medical background?
They did not ask me how to treat, they asked me what to do as a parent when their child was basically in a 3-day coma and has been talking in gibberish a few days since regaining consciousness.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 12:06
Subject: Re:Chemo patient off ventilator, but talking gibberish
Please do not come to DCUM for medical advice.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 12:05
Subject: Chemo patient off ventilator, but talking gibberish
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Sounds like she is delirious. Parents should text the team “larla seems to be is delirious and we are requesting a psych or whatever other service does these in that hospital) consult (psychiatry generally does these evals inpatient though in reality it’s a medical/neuro issue.)
if they say no, reply “are you saying she is not delirious or are you declining a consult for a delirious patient?”
This is terrible advice. This is not a psych issue.
I think your role in this situation is to be the friend who listens and not the friend who gives advice. If you want to do something helpful, buy your friend food or something.
They are asking my advice in this case. It's a close friend, but out of state.
It's so bad, the response from a worker was a blurb about peripheral neuropathy - copied and pasted from internet or I don't know. They showed it to me. As if that affects speech. .
I suggested they ask to speak with a neurologist. I pray this is temporary and can resolve. Hug your kids you all.
Why are they asking your advice, do you have a medical background?
Anonymous
05/12/2025 12:04
Subject: Chemo patient off ventilator, but talking gibberish
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Sounds like she is delirious. Parents should text the team “larla seems to be is delirious and we are requesting a psych or whatever other service does these in that hospital) consult (psychiatry generally does these evals inpatient though in reality it’s a medical/neuro issue.)
if they say no, reply “are you saying she is not delirious or are you declining a consult for a delirious patient?”
This is terrible advice. This is not a psych issue.
I think your role in this situation is to be the friend who listens and not the friend who gives advice. If you want to do something helpful, buy your friend food or something.
No, it’s not a mental health issue but evaluations for possible delirium are conducted by the psychiatric consult team in the vast, vast majority of cases. It’s good advice. Source-years of hospital experience
This is not a routine case of “possible delirium” it’s a child with newly diagnosed leukemia who has been in the ICU and ventilated. If there are any neurological changes, it’s either medications and/ or ICU pyschosis- or, a neurological problem due to the cancer. A neurologist should see her, not a psychiatrist.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 12:03
Subject: Chemo patient off ventilator, but talking gibberish
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Is the parent not with their child 24/7? Can they not ask to speak with the doctor in charge?
Parents are divorced, each is there half the time but other parent is weird and won't collaborate or share information. Hospital is in NY too and said certain records cannot be disclosed due to child privacy laws for children ages 9+!!!! Can.you.imagine. having a child being treated for leukemia, or in ICU on a ventilator suddenly and hearing that? I think a doctor passing through is rare. This hospital seems like hell.
Doctors usually round once a day. The nurses are your point of contact. A PICU patient either has a dedicated nurse or a nurse with a 1:2 ratio and should be able to convey info to the parents. Also they need to coparent better, I have no sympathy for them refusing to even be at the bedside at the same time
This. The parent needs to speak to the RN either in person or they can call the unit and ask to speak to the child's RN - tell the RN to page the physician and let them know that the parent is trying to get ahold of the MD to discuss their child's case. If in person, even if you missed MD rounds, you can request the MD to the patient's bedside through the RN or even the unit clerk. However, agree, the parents need to figure out a way to get along. The physician team will NOT want to have to repeat everything they say to two different parents, nor do they have the time for this, frankly.
Exactly. The physicians are not going to hold 2 separate care plan meetings for 2 parents who don’t want to be in the same room. Your friend and her partner are going to need to work things out here.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 12:00
Subject: Chemo patient off ventilator, but talking gibberish
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Sounds like she is delirious. Parents should text the team “larla seems to be is delirious and we are requesting a psych or whatever other service does these in that hospital) consult (psychiatry generally does these evals inpatient though in reality it’s a medical/neuro issue.)
if they say no, reply “are you saying she is not delirious or are you declining a consult for a delirious patient?”
This is terrible advice. This is not a psych issue.
I think your role in this situation is to be the friend who listens and not the friend who gives advice. If you want to do something helpful, buy your friend food or something.
No, it’s not a mental health issue but evaluations for possible delirium are conducted by the psychiatric consult team in the vast, vast majority of cases. It’s good advice. Source-years of hospital experience