OP wont be happy until her son dies by suicide from the pressure she puts on him.

Let this incredible man live his incredible life.

That’s a shame. I would be disappointed. Law school may never happen, or be years from now.
I’d make sure he is completely self-supporting, no help at all from you, period. He should be expected to save for law school, too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Taking a gap year between college and law school was one of the best things I did for myself. I can see being a patroller. I taught English in a ski town in another country that also has good skiing, and I highly recommend it as a gap year option.

More specifically, look into the JET program, and if he gets an offer, specify only ski towns when they ask where you'd like to be placed. They get a lot of snow in Hokkaido. It pays well enough that you will not need to subsidize him at all.

Selective program with preference for TESOL certified applicants.

Misinformed post.


“Can I work at another job while employed with the JET Program?
No. JET participants are only allowed to work for their contracting organizations. Violation of this policy could result in termination of the JET’s contract and deportation.“

I never implied taking another job. I did the JET program in a Japanese ski town plus skied every Saturday and Sunday and school break during the winter, and toured other parts of Japan in other seasons during breaks.

I don't have generational wealth so this whole scenario is so odd to me. I mean...yes, taking a gap year to pursue a joy-full job before law school makes sense. He's not going to be "poor". People in poverty don't have cars paid for and car insurance funded by their parents, or cell phones given to them by parents and paid for, either. Sure, he might have to shack up with other ski bums and eat pizza and Mac and cheese, but that's not poverty. People in poverty can't look forward to a fully paid for poostgraduate education.

A year of supporting himself could be really good for him. I would go way further and not pay for his car insurance. Let him truly take care of himself for a year.

Anonymous wrote:DS is taking a gap year between undergrad and grad school in the Colorado mountains this winter. As some one mentioned there are dorm rooms for employees at some resorts. Apply early to get housing. While DS can support his day to day expenses we are still helping with health insurance & car insurance but that is pretty common with young adults and it doesn't bother me to be doing this until he is out of grad school. FWIW he has met a lot of really interesting people on the ski slopes from other gap year students to Olympic skiers to owners of companies and he has matured a lot being on his own in the mountains.

Weird to fund adults.

This reads to me that YOU are paying for law school and he doesn’t need to be saving $ for law school. If he doesn’t have to worry about saving $ then lower paying jobs become option.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Taking a gap year between college and law school was one of the best things I did for myself. I can see being a patroller. I taught English in a ski town in another country that also has good skiing, and I highly recommend it as a gap year option.

More specifically, look into the JET program, and if he gets an offer, specify only ski towns when they ask where you'd like to be placed. They get a lot of snow in Hokkaido. It pays well enough that you will not need to subsidize him at all.

Selective program with preference for TESOL certified applicants.

Misinformed post.


“Can I work at another job while employed with the JET Program?
No. JET participants are only allowed to work for their contracting organizations. Violation of this policy could result in termination of the JET’s contract and deportation.“

Absolutely. You only usually get one chance to have a fun job and that is after graduating under grad.

Anonymous wrote:Thank goodness my parents didn’t have their nose in my business like this anymore at this phase of my life.

Same here and as a parent now of young adults, they're happy I'm not micromanaging their lives.

The thing to know, however, is they're hiring ski patrol staff for the winter now, so he needs to be working on it already.

Anonymous wrote:Taking a gap year between college and law school was one of the best things I did for myself. I can see being a patroller. I taught English in a ski town in another country that also has good skiing, and I highly recommend it as a gap year option.

More specifically, look into the JET program, and if he gets an offer, specify only ski towns when they ask where you'd like to be placed. They get a lot of snow in Hokkaido. It pays well enough that you will not need to subsidize him at all.

Taking a gap year between college and law school was one of the best things I did for myself. I can see being a patroller. I taught English in a ski town in another country that also has good skiing, and I highly recommend it as a gap year option.

OP here. Thanks - this is great feedback. Yes, we're a little worried that he's going to end up back on the payroll, which we can't really afford. But I do want him to have the year he wants so long as we're not doing more than paying for his car insurance and cell phone. I lived really poor in my 20s and it was mostly fun, but it also motivated me to go earn some money. As I said, we told him to go for it so long as he can support himself.

As for the couple of rude posters: 21 year olds look for advice from older members of our family because they themselves have limited life experience. Sorry your kids can't rely on you for that.

My patent attorney husband's first job after receiving his chemical engineering degree was the McDonald's in Jackson Hole because he did what your son wants to do. Once the season got underway he waited tables at a fine dining restaurant and lifeguarded.

I think it's harder to find affordable housing in ski towns now than it was in the 90s because of AirBnB's, etc. but some ski resorts have employee housing and there are group houses out there.

Anonymous wrote:Parents who don't fully pay for their kid's private college, grad/professional schools and living expenses etc are as free to support random ideas as wealthy people but upper middle class parents supporting adult kids have to face the consequences so they are more afraid of non conventional ideas.

I did fun things with zero financial support from my parents on a low budget. Why can’t this guy not eat ramen and shack up with five guys for a year while working in the mountains?