Anonymous
Post 04/26/2025 20:06     Subject: Subordinates possibly having an affair?
Anonymous wrote:I’d hold a company wide training about not sleeping with people you work with especially when you’re married.


Ridiculous. Just stop.
Anonymous
Post 04/26/2025 20:02     Subject: Subordinates possibly having an affair?
Anonymous wrote:wtf does OP know? She sees a male and female at work cracking jokes and immediately thinks they’re banging? Ugh.


I think Op is the problem.
Anonymous
Post 04/26/2025 19:11     Subject: Subordinates possibly having an affair?
Thanks. I will just mind my own business. So far, performance is unaffected, which is reassuring. I just hope that, if/when things escalate and/or blow up, group dynamics will not be affected. I will just feign ignorance of certain things seen, like going out of their way to keep certain interactions "secret" and the like.
Anonymous
Post 04/26/2025 19:07     Subject: Subordinates possibly having an affair?
Anonymous wrote:It’s nice that you and Larlo get along so well, since you need to work together every day. I’d hate to imagine how difficult things would be around here if you ever didn’t get along.


This is beyond stupid. Do not do this, OP.
Anonymous
Post 04/26/2025 18:45     Subject: Subordinates possibly having an affair?
I'm not sure there's much you can do, but when this happened at my office it blew up in spectacular fashion. The woman got pregnant, the man lost his job because his work declined covering for her, then she sued him for child support, which destroyed his marriage. He ended up going totally crazy, and he got arrested after he started calling the office threatening to come shoot up the place.
Anonymous
Post 04/26/2025 18:42     Subject: Subordinates possibly having an affair?
Anonymous wrote:Imagine you are a supervisor of two people. They are both married but their spouses travel a lot. They work very closely, and very well. You are particularly close to one of them, have become friends, have met their spouse, and have become their mentor.

You suspect they are having an affair, or will very soon have one. Work has *not* been affected. Their roles complement each other, so business needs dictate they should continue working closely together. But knowing one of these individuals well, you suspect that, if things escalate, this might not end up well for that person emotionally.

What would you do? Presumably the professional approach is to "do absolutely nothing, not your business, just ignore, they are adults." That said, you might be mindful of the fallout if/when things escalate / become complicated.

And independently, would you privately lose some level of respect for those individuals from a personal viewpoint, even if you of course continue to treat them with the upmost respect professionally?


I would absolutely lose respect for them, yes. And question the their maturity level.
Anonymous
Post 04/26/2025 18:34     Subject: Subordinates possibly having an affair?
Anonymous wrote:It’s nice that you and Larlo get along so well, since you need to work together every day. I’d hate to imagine how difficult things would be around here if you ever didn’t get along.


Sounds like a threat. Absolutely not.
Anonymous
Post 04/26/2025 18:20     Subject: Re:Subordinates possibly having an affair?
I’d start trying to move one of them to another team knowing that when she falls in love and he doesn’t leave his wife it’s all gonna blow up.
Anonymous
Post 04/26/2025 18:20     Subject: Subordinates possibly having an affair?
Anonymous wrote:It’s nice that you and Larlo get along so well, since you need to work together every day. I’d hate to imagine how difficult things would be around here if you ever didn’t get along.


No.
Anonymous
Post 04/26/2025 18:16     Subject: Subordinates possibly having an affair?
It’s nice that you and Larlo get along so well, since you need to work together every day. I’d hate to imagine how difficult things would be around here if you ever didn’t get along.
Anonymous
Post 04/26/2025 18:14     Subject: Subordinates possibly having an affair?
wtf does OP know? She sees a male and female at work cracking jokes and immediately thinks they’re banging? Ugh.
Anonymous
Post 04/26/2025 18:14     Subject: Subordinates possibly having an affair?
Anonymous wrote:Does your organization have rules about fraternization? Can coworkers "date"?
If not post the rules.


This. Have HR send around the employee handbook and in the email have a short table of contents that includes Romatic Relationships.

No one wants to be in the middle of a working team when two are banging each other.

And yes the likely outcome is they stop or don’t start or one leaves so they can continue.

Anonymous
Post 04/26/2025 18:07     Subject: Subordinates possibly having an affair?
Anonymous wrote:What is your company policy about office romance? I might quickly institute a policy if you don’t already have one, and I would have a training on it for everyone asap.

I would not lose respect for either of them. You never know what’s going on inside someone’s marriage. Also, people are fallible.


This is what I would do as well.
Anonymous
Post 04/26/2025 17:56     Subject: Subordinates possibly having an affair?
MYOB.
Anonymous
Post 04/26/2025 17:55     Subject: Subordinates possibly having an affair?
I'd avoid discussing personal matters. But if a subordinate seems upset, offer support.