I really hate the baby/toddler stage, so even with my "easy" one, that was the toughest time. My oldest of 3 is now 13 so we will see how it plays out. But it just seems like for all the challenges and emotions of later years, at least older kids walk, talk, use the toilet independently, take care of themselves to some extent, sleep through the night, participate in mutually enjoyable activities (like hiking or bike rides or water parks or reading dates or game night), blow their noses, puke in the toilet, have interesting conversations, develop interests, travel more easily - I don't get the appeal of babies, lol.

My kids are in college and I think the most difficult years were late middle school, basically puberty. They are really great now and their early childhoods were easy. Readying this thread makes me think it very much just depends on the kid and circumstances, there’s no one rule fits all here.

For my 2nd and 3rd kids, 2 years old was the hardest. It's very emotional work that's draining, plus also physically tiring. Nonstop screaming, irrational, teaching them not to hit and bite, hard headedness. Some days I thought I lost my mind.

I haven't yet hit the hard years with my oldest.

I only have a 3yo, but around now is the most difficult he's been.

Early years?

12 months to 18 months.

Peak clinginess & no communication skills was horrible for me.

Kids are in early elem now so TBD on the teenage years. I expect they will be very challenging for me.

So far, for us it has been the early 20’s.

3-5
Middle school for girls (and some boys)
Freshmen Through Junior year
1st 2 years of college

Golden years for my boys was 5-13

Depends on the kid.

My first was an angel until she turned 13 and finally got better well into early adulthood. Very long rebellious stage.

First 3 years were hell with my second. We didn’t sleep and it was constant tantrums. No issues after that and she was a perfect studious little teenager.

Anonymous wrote:My oldest is in high school and youngest in elementary. I think age 12-13 is the most unpleasant and difficult age to parent.

I remember having babies and toddlers and older parents would say the teen years are harder and they were right! The younger years were a breeze compared to the tween/teen years.

I'm finding that ages 18-22 are the hardest to parent. They have some agency, some freedom, want all the rights but are unwilling/unable to take all the responsibility. It's a difficult time.

The first year because I’m a single parent and I was just so tired all of the time. I felt like I was underwater due to the sleep deprivation.

I had great newborns. My one son nearly did me in at age 16. He was a total a**. He is a great 23 year old and a year ago he apologist for his awful behavior. My other son never gave me any problems.

My kids are only 3 and 4, but unless one of my kids dies, it’s impossible to imagine anything being harder than the newborn phase. Those first 4 months with each (one bad sleeper, one good sleeper but I had PPD) were I would say 10 times harder than anything I’ve experienced in parenting since.

I think it’s just me - I need a lot of sleep (ideally 9 hours) and basically cannot function when I’m sleep deprived. It’s literal torture for me. We sleep trained both at 4 months and everything got better. Two toddlers? Comparatively a walk in the freaking park. And I have a climber!

Even if we end up dealing with drug addiction, suicidal kids, bullying, teen pregnancy - at least I’d be getting enough sleep to function.

2 years old and 18-19 years old. Boys at least.

I found 12-13 to be extremely easy.

Absolutely agree it’s parent and kid personality dependent. My sample size so far is small (oldest is only 5) but so far I’ve far 12-18 months the absolute worst, maybe because I had daredevil kids who would make for the most dangerous thing as fast as they could toddle. Hovering was so exhausting. But still, I suspect the teen years will be worse for me; I struggled with teenagers when I was one myself. Good luck to everyone going through a hard age for your family!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing compares to newborns in terms of sheer horror.

But 11 was really hard (my kid hit puberty early). 12 has been great though!

I had easy babies and truly loved every day of infancy.

Pure hell started at 15 for my older, 14 for my youngest. Still waiting for it to end. Things are good with 18yo, still awful with 16yo.

You’re not allowed to have an easy baby AND easy teen years PP. That’s not fair to the rest of us who had pure hell babies. Lol

My friend had a pure hell baby who was a difficult toddler and defiant kid. The girl is entering puberty and sounds so hard and difficult. I’m sure the teen years will be bad as well. The kid came out crying and never stopped.