Anonymous wrote:I think this is more of a finance question than a real estate or midlife one, so posting here.
What are you doing with your real estate options when you get to say 55, or when you are empty nesters? Are you downsizing? Moving to a TH? Aging in place? Keeping a larger home for family gatherings, grandkids? What’s your plan?

Is this post from 1975? Empty Nestor at 55 ready to retire?

That was back when my Uncles were cops and Firemen married HS sweethearts young and by 55 a full pension and kids long gone. Kids just went an inexpensive local college.

Today men and women are having kids much later. Their kids are having kids much later and college costs are insane.

When I was 55 I had a 16, 14 and 10 year old at home.

Hence the issue downsizing no longer works

My youngest graduates college when I am 67 and then wants to move home for grad school.

Then until they are married with kids I am still hosting holidays.

I thought I was an old parent but tons and tons parents my age at school.

My friend is 61 with a 13, 11 and 6 year old at home. Had last kid he was 55, wife 45.

55 year olds are still having kids and 25-30 years from retirement.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t downsize to a townhouse. Many have over 30 steps. Not good for aging knees.

Master suit on ground floor is a must after 60.

My parents are 77 and bought a small two-story house a few years ago (there were no one-stories in the community). They lived in a two-story house for the 40 years before that, too. I’m convinced that having to climb stairs daily is about the best way to keep healthy as you age. Of course, that all changes with real disability, but for many folks now that doesn’t come until well into your 80s.

+1 my mom moved with my sister to a home that has two masters - one on main floor (mom) and one upstairs (sister). After living in a house that had half-flights of stairs she regularly used with no issues she now never has to go up more than one step and her mobility has deteriorated rapidly.

I'm not sure what we will do -- kids are now in college and we live in the same house we bought before kids and then did a modest addition. It's a good size for us (and has two flights, down to basement and up to master bed/bath) but as the home value has risen our property taxes have gotten really high. DH would like us to move mainly to lower the taxes but he hates condos. But I don't want to leave my whole social group and volunteer work so I'd want to stay in the area. Realistically then, that means a townhouse. It's still down the road a while but I occasionally look at townhouse listings. I think what I'd want is something that does have a room/bath on the entry level just in case one of us has a issue that requires using that, either as a short term solution (e.g. someone has surgery?) or in transition if we'd reached the point where it's time to fully move to assisted living/CCR.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t downsize to a townhouse. Many have over 30 steps. Not good for aging knees.

Master suit on ground floor is a must after 60.

You must be young! Most people in their 60s are fine with stairs.

I'm 63 and just did a hike yesterday that is the equivalent of 60 flights of stairs. Use it or lose it.

Our beloved neighbor died late last year from a fall in her home with lots of stairs. She tumbled down the stairs. She was of sound mind and very active, but in her early 80s and broke her hip. Health failed while in the hospital and died after a few weeks of convalescence.

Once you hit 80, you are one fall away from dying. Or living the rest of your life with much more restricted mobility (but might as well be dead TBH). The fall itself might not even kill you, but the injuries from the fall kick off a cascade of health issues that wreck your quality-of-life and eventually kills you.

I know someone who died this way as well. He was very spry for his age (80s) and he / his wife still traveled, fished, etc. But he got disoriented in the middle of the night and fell and died within days.

I'll be honest: part of me sees this as the horrible thing it is for his wife/family/him and it could have been avoidable with a ranch. Part of me feels like, if I'm going to go, it's not the worst way. It's over fast. And in your 80s that's all you can ask for.

I am 54 so unless something changes in the next year or so, nothing. I am doing nothing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t downsize to a townhouse. Many have over 30 steps. Not good for aging knees.

Master suit on ground floor is a must after 60.

You must be young! Most people in their 60s are fine with stairs.

I'm 63 and just did a hike yesterday that is the equivalent of 60 flights of stairs. Use it or lose it.

Our beloved neighbor died late last year from a fall in her home with lots of stairs. She tumbled down the stairs. She was of sound mind and very active, but in her early 80s and broke her hip. Health failed while in the hospital and died after a few weeks of convalescence.

Once you hit 80, you are one fall away from dying. Or living the rest of your life with much more restricted mobility (but might as well be dead TBH). The fall itself might not even kill you, but the injuries from the fall kick off a cascade of health issues that wreck your quality-of-life and eventually kills you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t downsize to a townhouse. Many have over 30 steps. Not good for aging knees.

Master suit on ground floor is a must after 60.

You must be young! Most people in their 60s are fine with stairs.

I'm 63 and just did a hike yesterday that is the equivalent of 60 flights of stairs. Use it or lose it.

Yes, most can still do stairs. But you are one fall/injury away from not being comfortable in your home. So if you buy a new place in your 50s/60s, it does make sense to make it one floor/condo/th with elevator/home with at least one bedroom and full bath on the main level so you can be in your home for longer

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have a large city house in Dc and beach house currently.

After the kids go to college, we will sell the DC house.

We'll keep the beach house. We might upgrade it between now and then if we can get something larger.

We will add a condo/ coop in Manhattan and add something else. That something else could be all over the place. We've considered something in the Caribbean, a ranch, another condo or coop in a large city.

We tried this.

Ugh hated living at beach full time .

Sold beach place. Doctors and vets were too hard to make appointments and nothing to do in the winter…

Pp said they would also have another place.

DP: we have a condo in the city (not DCUM area) 2/2, renovated before we moved in so set for the next 20+ years, then sold the big house and bought a slightly smaller one that is only an hour away. Home is in a more quaint/quieter area, view of the water, just a relaxing place to go. Works for us. We debated a condo at the beach/Hawaii and decided it's cheaper to rent when you want to go, because the novelty of living there wears off fast (have friends who have done it) and figure we really would only want to go 2-3 times per year and stay for 2-3 weeks at most.
So easier to just rent and not have the responsibility

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t downsize to a townhouse. Many have over 30 steps. Not good for aging knees.

Master suit on ground floor is a must after 60.

lol. My next door neighbor is 94 and lives in a cute tiny cape cod with her bedroom upstairs. She *just* put in a motorized chair to go up and down about 2 months ago when she broke her hip. Before that she was up and down on the regular every day!

My parents are nearing 80 and they live in a house where the garage off the basement and are still fine aging in place and taking the stairs.

60 is way too young to have such bad knees!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t downsize to a townhouse. Many have over 30 steps. Not good for aging knees.

Master suit on ground floor is a must after 60.

You must be young! Most people in their 60s are fine with stairs.

I'm 63 and just did a hike yesterday that is the equivalent of 60 flights of stairs. Use it or lose it.

My downsizing dream: elevator townhouse or condo in the city, ranch with acreage in the mountains

I'd like to move to a house with a more spacious layout. However, our house is nearly paid off, and homes are extremely expensive around here.

It'd be nice to have more space for children to come back with their significant other / kids one day.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t downsize to a townhouse. Many have over 30 steps. Not good for aging knees.

Master suit on ground floor is a must after 60.

You must be young! Most people in their 60s are fine with stairs.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t downsize to a townhouse. Many have over 30 steps. Not good for aging knees.

Master suit on ground floor is a must after 60.

My parents are 77 and bought a small two-story house a few years ago (there were no one-stories in the community). They lived in a two-story house for the 40 years before that, too. I’m convinced that having to climb stairs daily is about the best way to keep healthy as you age. Of course, that all changes with real disability, but for many folks now that doesn’t come until well into your 80s.

Condo in a lively part of DC with access to restaurants, parks, metro and zip car, will get rid of big house in suburb and cars. Less house care and more self care.

We will sell our house and move to our second home - a condo in NYC. I'm very excited.