My stepsons were my husbands’ best men. (I didn’t have bridesmaids.). We also said a vow to them as well as to each other when we got married. One of them gave a speech at the rehearsal dinner—they gave me a necklace from my MIL that I wore at the wedding. I gave a toast to them (and gave them each a gift) at the wedding reception.
More than a decade letter, we’re all still good and they have happy memories of the night.

We're you not married to his Dad? People can play weddings any way they like. The one rule is there are no rules....except maybe send a thank you note for gifts.

Anonymous wrote:I think that it's a very sweet gesture and shows how much the dad wants to celebrate the bond he has with his son as he takes on a new (?) wife and help the son feel connected to the new family. I would not try to micromanage the sons responsibilities in the wedding. I think the bride and groom can help decide what the son should be doing

This.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not weird, makes sense for him to want his son to be part of the wedding. He’s too old to be a ring bearer.

I asked him if he was giving a speech and he had no idea that best men give speeches...!

This sounds like a pretty non traditional event. Are you sure that his father intends for him to make a speech or are you just trying to ruin the experience for your son and his father?

Great sign he’s telling his son he’s not going to drop him for his new family

Not weird. People can take different roles if they are inclined to. Not everyone should attempt to have a 13 year old as a best man because it does not make sense.

I think that it's a very sweet gesture and shows how much the dad wants to celebrate the bond he has with his son as he takes on a new (?) wife and help the son feel connected to the new family. I would not try to micromanage the sons responsibilities in the wedding. I think the bride and groom can help decide what the son should be doing

My brother was a widower with three children and when he remarried his 12 year old son was his best man. He did a wonderful job and his best man speech was almost all about his new stepmother. There wasn’t a dry eye in the house.

I think it’s a wonderful idea and is indicative of a very good relationship. The typical best man responsibilities can be handed off to others.

we to a wedding last fall where the 14 yr old son was the groom's best man. And he gave a simple but lovely (and well-prepared) toast. Basically a few soft jokes about the dad, a few lovely things about the bride, a welcome to the family. Cheer

Anonymous wrote:This is not weird at all. It is lovely.

And this kid doesn’t have to do anything like host or give a speech unless he and the dad agree on these things. The kid isn’t going to be arrested if he “fails” some strange litmus test some of you have for best man duties. The two of them can work this out.

+1

I was a flower girl at my parents' wedding. Don't remember a thing

Anonymous wrote:The groomsmen have a role to play with things like helping guests to seats, rounding up the right people for group photos. A 13-year-old is a child, not a man.

Stop being so rigid about wedding roles!

Anonymous wrote:Is that weird? My child just told me he's his Dad's best man at his wedding. I thought it was weird, but maybe I haven't been to enough weddings?

Maybe you went to one too many, or one too few, depending on what happened with you and the Dad.

Anonymous wrote:The groomsmen have a role to play with things like helping guests to seats, rounding up the right people for group photos. A 13-year-old is a child, not a man.

The best man's job is to support the groom how the groom needs, not to be an admin assistant.