Anonymous
Post 01/20/2020 10:47     Subject: SAHM: what do you do to protect yourself financially?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
I agree that people have made life plans based on this benefit and it would be unfair to pull it. But I think the rules should change for people who are 20 years old or younger (or born in 2020 or whatever arbitrary date seems reasonable). Simultaneously, drop the cost of college somehow so people can actually afford to build a career.
SAHP is not always the “luxury” choice. Most of the families I know with a sahp have a child with SN. They made planned to have dual WOHP, but it did not work with what life threw at them.


Of course. And single moms that had SN kids... well they're just screwed. Because they didn't plan well.



Hmmm, why single out single mums for blame! They are often heroes. Married with 2 SN but also gifted children. Many friends who are single mums and awesome. There are many reasons why some people are single parents and often has nothing to do with inadequate planning. Life is complicated and full of surprises.

Children do not ask to be born or adopted. When they are brought into this world, they need adequate care and love, which can be provided by biological/ adoptive fathers or mothers or single parents or sometimes even grandparents. It is often women who become SAH caregivers though since unfortunately men are still Likely to earn more. That is slowly changing.

As today is Martin Luther King Day, it is good to dream about a world where women enjoy equal rights, equal pay and equal access to power.


MLK cheated on wife all the time and had affairs. He was terrible to women.


Yes that is why I would like to see his I have a dream speech updated to emphasize equality for women.
Anonymous
Post 01/20/2020 10:32     Subject: SAHM: what do you do to protect yourself financially?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:No, because it's not a fairly set up benefit. It largely privileges wealthy women who don't need it. A fairer system would be to increase benefits to everyone who paid in and get rid of spousal payment entirely.


Whose husbands likely paid the max rate into SS over a 40+ year career, not to mention being in a high tax bracket. We also give benefits to lots of people who don’t pay in, for example “disabled” people (not to be confused with actual disabled people.) We also pay for daycare, food and medical for my friend’s disabled child even though she does not work and her husband makes $1M/year.

Lots of benefits are unfair. Now, if we want to get rid of them all and lower taxes, by all means...


By the time my husband and I retire, we will both have paid the max rate into SS over 40+ year careers. Not just DH. We did not make the choice for me (or him) to stay home. If we had, I don’t think either of us would consider it unfair for us to bear the financial fall out from that decision - not everyone who contributes to the ss fund. You can bring in other “unfair” parts of the tax and entitlement codes if you wish, but many of us are focused on this one that seems unfair (especially if the SAH parent is a luxury choice).

I agree that people have made life plans based on this benefit and it would be unfair to pull it. But I think the rules should change for people who are 20 years old or younger (or born in 2020 or whatever arbitrary date seems reasonable). Simultaneously, drop the cost of college somehow so people can actually afford to build a career.


You will also have 2 401Ks, IRAs, possibly 2 pensions to draw from in retirement. You seriously think that rich people like you should be able to collect on a societal safety net while leaving SAHPs high and dry simply because they chose to SAH with their kids - like that's some sort of a disreputable thing to do?

I've got news for you. If SS is taken away from anyone it's going to be those with over 'X' amount of money in their own retirement funds and that includes both wealthy working spouses along with wealthy SAHs.
Anonymous
Post 01/20/2020 10:19     Subject: SAHM: what do you do to protect yourself financially?
Working Moms are ones who need protection. Now SAHMs.

My wife for example. Has not worked since January 2001. She is 55. We have three kids, 13, 17 and 19. Our net worth was around 300K all in (home equity).

Today if we did divorce she gets child support till youngest turns 18, she gets to say in my home till youngest turns 18, she gets alimony maybe for life as Maryland takes into account long term SAHM near retirement age may not be able to work. I have done the full SS so she gets 1.2 my SS which is Max amount.

Our net worth today is around 5 million. So she gets a check for 2.5 million.

I have a women working for me she makes 150K a year and her husband 75K a year. She has worked 20 years. In a divorce she is one getting screwed more. She is breadwinner.

I picture myself in a basement apt with a barebulb and a twin bed in divorce. My wife is keeping house. Remember, SAHMs dont divorce you. You have to divorce them and they dont leave easy.

Anonymous
Post 01/20/2020 10:03     Subject: SAHM: what do you do to protect yourself financially?
Anonymous wrote:
I agree that people have made life plans based on this benefit and it would be unfair to pull it. But I think the rules should change for people who are 20 years old or younger (or born in 2020 or whatever arbitrary date seems reasonable). Simultaneously, drop the cost of college somehow so people can actually afford to build a career.
SAHP is not always the “luxury” choice. Most of the families I know with a sahp have a child with SN. They made planned to have dual WOHP, but it did not work with what life threw at them.


Of course. And single moms that had SN kids... well they're just screwed. Because they didn't plan well.



Hmmm, why single out single mums for blame! They are often heroes. Married with 2 SN but also gifted children. Many friends who are single mums and awesome. There are many reasons why some people are single parents and often has nothing to do with inadequate planning. Life is complicated and full of surprises.

Children do not ask to be born or adopted. When they are brought into this world, they need adequate care and love, which can be provided by biological/ adoptive fathers or mothers or single parents or sometimes even grandparents. It is often women who become SAH caregivers though since unfortunately men are still Likely to earn more. That is slowly changing.

As today is Martin Luther King Day, it is good to dream about a world where women enjoy equal rights, equal pay and equal access to power.


MLK cheated on wife all the time and had affairs. He was terrible to women.
Anonymous
Post 01/20/2020 07:48     Subject: SAHM: what do you do to protect yourself financially?

I agree that people have made life plans based on this benefit and it would be unfair to pull it. But I think the rules should change for people who are 20 years old or younger (or born in 2020 or whatever arbitrary date seems reasonable). Simultaneously, drop the cost of college somehow so people can actually afford to build a career.
SAHP is not always the “luxury” choice. Most of the families I know with a sahp have a child with SN. They made planned to have dual WOHP, but it did not work with what life threw at them.


Of course. And single moms that had SN kids... well they're just screwed. Because they didn't plan well.



Hmmm, why single out single mums for blame! They are often heroes. Married with 2 SN but also gifted children. Many friends who are single mums and awesome. There are many reasons why some people are single parents and often has nothing to do with inadequate planning. Life is complicated and full of surprises.

Children do not ask to be born or adopted. When they are brought into this world, they need adequate care and love, which can be provided by biological/ adoptive fathers or mothers or single parents or sometimes even grandparents. It is often women who become SAH caregivers though since unfortunately men are still Likely to earn more. That is slowly changing.

As today is Martin Luther King Day, it is good to dream about a world where women enjoy equal rights, equal pay and equal access to power.
Anonymous
Post 01/20/2020 07:33     Subject: SAHM: what do you do to protect yourself financially?


I agree that people have made life plans based on this benefit and it would be unfair to pull it. But I think the rules should change for people who are 20 years old or younger (or born in 2020 or whatever arbitrary date seems reasonable). Simultaneously, drop the cost of college somehow so people can actually afford to build a career.
SAHP is not always the “luxury” choice. Most of the families I know with a sahp have a child with SN. They made planned to have dual WOHP, but it did not work with what life threw at them.


+1