Anonymous
Post 12/02/2023 04:53     Subject: Do you judge other women’s engagement rings?
I judge people who judge, I guess. I once had a 13 year old 9th grader mock the size of my ring, telling me my husband must not love me. So there’s that. I suppose I think those who judge rings are juvenile.

For those of you with big showy diamonds: Many people don’t notice or care. If you’re trying to make some impression, just know that plenty of people never look.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2023 04:14     Subject: Do you judge other women’s engagement rings?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don’t even notice their ring. I did in my 20s when a lot of people were getting engaged, but now I never really look. And so many people just wear their wedding band anyhow.


+100. Now that I’m in my 50s, I never notice unless it’s a huge ring and looks gaudy. Most of the women I know only wear their band.


+ I kind of judge (usually older) women who still daily wear their engagement ring as a stack. Agree most women I know only wear their band, maybe with the occasional e-ring day on weekends or occasions. We are in a well-educated/UMC circle of people mostly making high six to seven figures.

I sometimes see recently engaged gen-z women on my team sporting large oval cut e-rings and they are open that they are lab diamonds or moissanites because this seems to be the trend now, none of them want blood diamonds. Others have very uniquely designed e-rings that are more about the design than the stone. So size is no longer really a signifier of anything.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2023 03:37     Subject: Do you judge other women’s engagement rings?
Anonymous wrote:My single lesbian SIL took the 1.5 carat diamond ring my husband was going to use to make my engagement ring off her dead grandma's finger and claimed it for herself, so there's that. I'm not complaining though because I have a custom made 7mm pink sapphire with a diamond halo and pave band that suits me much better.


Her grandmother would probably like that it's on a blood family member's finger-instead of a grand DIL. I know I would.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2023 02:07     Subject: Do you judge other women’s engagement rings?
I have to admit there was just one time I inadvertently judged someone’s ring, and I was so taken aback I think they knew right away. I felt so bad. The rock was so big and the wearer’s hand so small that it looked really, really tacky to me. And I have a high tolerance for sparkly expensive jewelry! I’m not one of those people judging like a 2ct ring or whatever.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2023 01:15     Subject: Do you judge other women’s engagement rings?
Now with how how common lab diamonds are and how (relatively) cheap a big diamond is, I wouldn’t assume anything about finances.

I rarely notice rings but might if there was something uniquely beautiful or ugly that caught my eye.
Anonymous
Post 12/01/2023 23:49     Subject: Do you judge other women’s engagement rings?
I "upgraded" to a 2 carat equivalent moissanite a few years ago and get way more compliments on it than I ever did on my diamond. Jokes on you, lady!
Anonymous
Post 12/01/2023 23:48     Subject: Do you judge other women’s engagement rings?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I do.

Sometimes when I see a woman with a tiny diamond I wonder how cheap her husband must be to not bother to get her something nicer.

The larger the diamond the more I think her husband wanted to impress her/ show his love. Also that he’s rich.


If size or cost of a ring or a wedding was a good measure of a couple's love or predictor of quality or length of the marriage, lives would be so easy.

Same goes for financial status. Just because a couple is frugal or carefree, doesn't mean they don't have higher income, investments or inheritance than schlubs with heavy loans flaunting their extravagant diamond.


I'm always amazed at American's idea of inheritance. Do you mean some cash? Because, for us, it means valuable real estate (no mortgage), good art and jewelry, not just some cash from a generation or two - liar here.

Fixed that for you.
Anonymous
Post 12/01/2023 23:47     Subject: Do you judge other women’s engagement rings?
My single lesbian SIL took the 1.5 carat diamond ring my husband was going to use to make my engagement ring off her dead grandma's finger and claimed it for herself, so there's that. I'm not complaining though because I have a custom made 7mm pink sapphire with a diamond halo and pave band that suits me much better.
Anonymous
Post 12/01/2023 23:40     Subject: Do you judge other women’s engagement rings?
On the contrary, I judge women with huge rings. Husband have a tiny peen? Married for money? Incredibly insecure? Shallow and kind of pathetic?
Anonymous
Post 12/01/2023 23:28     Subject: Re:Do you judge other women’s engagement rings?
Almost none of the women I hang out with are married, and neither am I. Late forties.
Anonymous
Post 12/01/2023 23:02     Subject: Do you judge other women’s engagement rings?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I do.

Sometimes when I see a woman with a tiny diamond I wonder how cheap her husband must be to not bother to get her something nicer.

The larger the diamond the more I think her husband wanted to impress her/ show his love. Also that he’s rich.


If size or cost of a ring or a wedding was a good measure of a couple's love or predictor of quality or length of the marriage, lives would be so easy.

Same goes for financial status. Just because a couple is frugal or carefree, doesn't mean they don't have higher income, investments or inheritance than schlubs with heavy loans flaunting their extravagant diamond.


I'm always amazed at American's idea of inheritance. Do you mean some cash? Because, for us, it means valuable real estate (no mortgage), good art and jewelry, not just some cash from a generation or two - European here.
Anonymous
Post 12/01/2023 22:56     Subject: Do you judge other women’s engagement rings?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:No. I’m way too preoccupied looking at which men are wearing their rings. I barely notice women in general.


What do you assume when men aren’t wearing their wedding rings? Just curious because my husband lost his a couple months after we got married and never replaced it. It has been sixteen years. He has toyed with the idea of getting a ring tattoo but he doesn’t like rings.



For a professional, white collar man not wearing a ring I would assume first that he was single. 2nd that he was up to no good if I know he is married—especially if he is wearing other jewelry. 3rd some men are very practical with money.

In the case of men who can’t dress, clothes don’t fit properly, shoes and belt don’t match or his shoes are for a different occasion than the rest of his outfit (church shoes with jeans type of men), multiple pairs of white new balance or nike type dudes, I would assume he doesn’t like jewelry or doesn’t care about it. Or even some men the kind that are more rustic, dirty nails types, wears a uniform to work types probably aren’t wearing jewelry because they work in dangerous conditions.


+1. Mine wears his ring. At my work (financial services), the ones without rings are trouble.
Anonymous
Post 12/01/2023 22:44     Subject: Do you judge other women’s engagement rings?
I judge the tiny diamonds because I just don’t think they’re attractive? Why not get a different stone that looks better? I also don’t like the frilly rings or the ones with halos, scroll work,etc.

I have a 2ct and it looks massive on my size 4 finger. The same stone is small on my moms size 8 finger. My favorite thing to wear is my eternity band.
Anonymous
Post 12/01/2023 22:36     Subject: Do you judge other women’s engagement rings?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:No. I’m way too preoccupied looking at which men are wearing their rings. I barely notice women in general.


What do you assume when men aren’t wearing their wedding rings? Just curious because my husband lost his a couple months after we got married and never replaced it. It has been sixteen years. He has toyed with the idea of getting a ring tattoo but he doesn’t like rings.



For a professional, white collar man not wearing a ring I would assume first that he was single. 2nd that he was up to no good if I know he is married—especially if he is wearing other jewelry. 3rd some men are very practical with money.

In the case of men who can’t dress, clothes don’t fit properly, shoes and belt don’t match or his shoes are for a different occasion than the rest of his outfit (church shoes with jeans type of men), multiple pairs of white new balance or nike type dudes, I would assume he doesn’t like jewelry or doesn’t care about it. Or even some men the kind that are more rustic, dirty nails types, wears a uniform to work types probably aren’t wearing jewelry because they work in dangerous conditions.
Anonymous
Post 12/01/2023 22:34     Subject: Do you judge other women’s engagement rings?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Not at all. Also, my wealthiest friends all have smaller rings. Most are vintage or family rings but not all. I’m talking friends with very high net worths or big trust funds.


How do you define high net worth?


Net worth’s over $25 million.


Um, no. There are recognized standards for this and yours clearly isn’t it.
https://www.forbes.com/advisor/investing/financial-advisor/high-net-worth-individual-hnwi/#:~:text=HNWIs%20are%20people%20or%20households,high%2Dnet%2Dworth%20individuals.