Here's one circumstance, among many, where Islam is incredibly unfair to women. That circumstance is the non-existence of concept of marital property.

In Islam, both spouses retain their assets and income and they do not become commingled by virtue of marriage. In case of divorce (to which men, not women, have a unilateral right), a husband owes his wife 3 months worth of maintenance. That's it. After that, she's on her own. There is no alimony, no division of assets, nothing. The children do remain a financial responsibility of the husband.

That means, theoretically, that a woman can marry, stay at home for thirty years to take care of a guy's house, bear his children, be a homemaker Islam expects her to be, and thirty years later (or whenever, really), her husband can divorce her and send her on her merry way with 3 months of maintenance, and no share of any assets the family has accumulated during marriage. A case in India where a divorced, elderly Muslim woman wanted her ex husband to pay her a share of marital assets Indian law requires turned into massive protests by Muslims who did not want their marital law contradicted in any way. (Shah Bano).

If you are a woman who has to divorce, the Western law treats you way, way better.

Are you one of those people sending money to the Boston terrorist guy in prison?

Anonymous wrote:

A marriage is a partnership, each person has a duty to fulfill in order to make that marriage work. The Quran just states these duties clearly, for both men and women. It is kind of like a work contract. You are expected to perform certain duties at work, you cant just do what you want and make yourself happy and not please your boss. Both parties have to be happy in order to have a good relationship be it at work or at home. America is a high divorce rate of over 50%, dont you wonder why? [/b]

KSA, the Muslimest place on earth, has a divorce rate of 50%, too - don't you wonder why?

Anonymous wrote:Is there a basis in the Koran for it being ok to wear makeup but requiring hair to be covered? I've seen several muslim women wearing headscarves with really terrific makeup on, it looked nice but I didn't understand how it was consistent.

In order to observe the proper "Hijab" (which not only consists of headcovering but includes covering of the body AND the way you carry yourself), you must not do things to draw too much attention to your "beauty". You can wear makeup but it should be natural looking.

Anonymous wrote:Are you required to walk behind, not astride, with your husband? How do you discipline your children? Is physical punishment of children the norm? Are husbands allowed to strike their wives?

No there is no basis for this.

I was born here in America so basically I follow many "american" ways of discipling my children. Any physical harm towards your child and wife is not allowed.

Anonymous wrote:Can a non-Muslim buy meat from a Halal grocery store/market? Will the employees look at a female oddly if she goes to shop there? Would race matter?

There is no particular "look" that distinguishes between a Muslim and Non-Muslim. There are many Muslims that do not wear a headscarf or men that do not have a beard. They look just like a non-muslim. Muslims come in all races as well. So no, I highly doubt that anyone will look at you oddly. Business is business they just want your money lol

Anonymous wrote:Do you consider yourself to be a "patriotic" American?

Yes, I was born here, raised here. Of course there will always be some sense of patriotism within me.

Anonymous wrote:Are you forbidden to have dogs as pets?

it is not forbidden to have Dogs as pets. However, Muslims are discouraged to keep them and they should not treat their dogs better than their family members. Also we can not pray in he area where a Dog has been.

Anonymous wrote:Why are you part of a religion (or insert organization) where women are second to men? Do you believe that men are superior or in charge of women? If so, why?

Where does it say in our religion that women are treated second to men? In Islam men and women are equal in front of God. No where does it say men are superior to women.

However, men are physically stronger than women which is why a woman should not travel alone. It is for protection of the women. Men are the primary bread winner, this doesnt mean women cant work but simply means it is a MANS responsibilty to provide for the family so that the woman can care and attend to her children. It is so that a woman does not feel the burden to have to work but should do it because she chooses too. When a woman makes money, it is hers to keep and she can spend it however she wants (on things permissible in Islam) without her husband questioning it.

A marriage is a partnership, each person has a duty to fulfill in order to make that marriage work. The Quran just states these duties clearly, for both men and women. It is kind of like a work contract. You are expected to perform certain duties at work, you cant just do what you want and make yourself happy and not please your boss. Both parties have to be happy in order to have a good relationship be it at work or at home. America is a high divorce rate of over 50%, dont you wonder why?

I am the poster of the above 3 posts. Just wanted to say to the OP..sorry for taking over! lol

Anonymous wrote:Would there be a problem if you out earn your spouse? Are you required to give a tithe?

In Islam, if a women chooses to earn her own income...it is for her to keep. She is not required to give it to her husband nor use it towards the household expenses. However, a woman who wants to have a stable income, peace and happiness within her family and/or wants to elevate the burden from her husband she can chose to do so, but it is not her religious obligation. Whereas for a man, it is his religious duty to care for his family financially.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does Islam impose a higher moral standard for how you treat other Muslims than for how you treat non-Muslims?

Not OP but Another Muslim poster: nope- a person is a person.

A Muslim man once told me if want fine for him to sleep with non-Muslim women outside of marriage but that he would be defiling a Muslim woman if he did that with her before marriage. I found that insulting. What was he talking about?

This is HIS personal opinion and has nothing to do with Islam. In Islam, pre marital sex is a sin, be it with a muslim or a non-muslim. And Frankly, I dont blame you for finding it insulting because it is! Basically he is saying he would not sleep with a Muslim because he has more respect for her than a non-muslim. This is a load of crap! Please don't take what one Muslim says and think this is what all Muslims believe in. I am glad you asked.

Muslims are suppose to treat all human beings as humans, we are told to respect all religions and people.

Anonymous wrote:Are their any fun holidays for kids in the Muslim faith (like Christmas or Hanukkah type things)?

EID, we celebrate this holiday 2x a year.

Anonymous wrote:Can you tell us more about what Eid is? They sell stamps to commemorate it at the post office, but I never knew what it was about.

Basically, Eid is a religious celebration. Both holidays are based on the lunar calendar therefore having varying days from year to year. We have two Eids that take place every year. One is called Eid-ul Adha (the feast of sacrifice), the other is called Eid-ul Fitr (the feast of breaking the fast).

Eid ul Adha is our major festival which honors the willingness of Prophet Abraham to sacrifice his son Ishmael as an act to submit to God's command. However, God intervened and replaced a lamb to be sacrificed in place of his son.

Eid ul Fitr is a celebrations that marks the end of the Holy month of Ramadan. Ramadan is the month in which Muslims fast for 29-30 days.

Anonymous wrote:Why (according to All-American Muslim) are IVF and other reproductive technology discouraged?

Are you expected to have a lot of kids? How many is customary?

Actually, this is false. Medical technoloy and advances are supported by Muslims. If there are advances made we are encouraged to use them within boundaries. It depends on what kind of technology we are talking about. For instance with IVF, if a couple is having trouble getting pregnant than they can turn to IVF but within limitations... it has to be within a marriage, the eggs have to be the wifes and the sperm must be the husbands and you can not use a surrogate or donors.

You are not expected to have kids at all but it encouraged in Islam to have children. There is no set number that is required. It is a personal choice.

Anonymous wrote:For religious muslim women who cover their hair, at what age are girls expected to start wearing a head scarf? I saw a toddler on the train with a head scarf, and was of the (perhaps mistaken) view that most girls did not cover their hair until they got older.

Girls are suppose to cover their hair and body by the time they hit puberty. However, this varies from one Islamic household to the next. Some cover, some dont. Like the other poster mentioned, some parents want to get their child used to wearing the headscarf at an earlier age so that by the time they hit puberty they will be comfortable wearing it. however they are never forced to wear it. Most kids at that young of an age want to copy what their moms are doing.

Anonymous wrote:Have you gone on Hajj? If not, when are you going to go? Is there some sort of "penalty" if you die before you have gone to Mecca?

No I have not. The goal is to go ASAP because you never know if tomorrow will be your last breath... but because of family life, job and financial situation many people are unable to go until much older, sometimes retirement years. If one is unable to go because of financial reasons or poor health it is not required for them to go.

Anonymous wrote:Also, do you really have to cut off your hair as part of the Hajj?

Only the men do that

Anonymous wrote:why do you light skinned muslims think that dark skinned people are not humans?

Hmm, never heard of seen that happen before. Some of the best Muslims among us are African-Americans. In Islam, Muslims are not racist. It is clearly stated in our religion that we are judged by our actions not by our race and that we are all equal when we stand before God on the Day of Judgement

Anonymous wrote:Do you wear a head cover? Are you required to wear one to sleep? If you were forced to be in a room with others, eg a large room with cots because of an emergency evacuations, would you be allowed to go to sleep because there are men who are not in your family in the same room?

Yes, I wear a headcover (Hijab is the arabic term). No we do not have to sleep in it. We are only required to wear the hijab in front of men that are not a part of our immediate family (blood relatives). Hence, we do not have to cover in front on our husbands, brothers, sons, nephews, grandfathers, uncles. We can take off the hijab in front of women as well.

Islam is not meant to be a difficult religion. We are allowed and encouraged to use our own common sense. If we find ourselves in an emergency situation than God knows that and is merciful and forgiving.

Hi guys, I am not OP but would like to answer some questions as I am Muslim and think this thread was a wonderful idea. There are different kinds of Muslims from all walks of life some follow the teachings closely while others do not. Just like there is good and bad in all races and religions, there are good and bad among Muslims as well. Basically, what makes a Muslim, Muslim is following and believing the 5 basic pillars of Islam.... 1. Testimony of Faith (the belief of the oneness of God and the Prophet Muhammed being His messenger. 2. Prayer (5 daily prayers a day) 3. Fasting during the month of Ramadan 4. Charity (Muslims must give a very modest portion of their earnings to the poor once a year-at least) 5. Pilgrimmage to Mecca (Hajj)

Anonymous wrote:Were you brought up Muslim? Are you originally from the US?

Yes I was born and raised in America and so were my kids and Husban. Yes, I am originally from here because I was born here but my ancestors came from India the same way most of you have ancestors from other parts of the world.

Anonymous wrote:Do you have pictures of your kids in your wallet?

Of course!

Anonymous wrote:Are you married? Did you date?

Yes I am married, yes I dated although this is not allowed in Islam. Like I said there are all kinds of Muslims in this world.

Anonymous wrote:I remember seeing men in white knit beanie caps standing in street corners in dc when I was little. My parents told me they were nation of Islam and doing some sort of protection in the area.
Is that the same Muslim as you or is there a difference between being Muslim and Nation of Islam? Are these guys still in those areas?

Perhaps they were Nation of Islam, followers of the Nation of Islam are different than Followers of Islam. Nation of Islam adapted some beliefs from Islam but added some things to their religion as well that we Muslims dont believe in.

Anonymous wrote:If you're female, do you go to the beach? What do you wear?

Yes, I do go to the beach. I usually wear a sarong like skirt clothes that are not revealing yet flowing and summer-like

Anonymous wrote:How do you feel about Muhammed marrying a 9 year old? Do you consider him a pedophile? If not, would you allow your 9yr old girl to marry a 50 something prophet (assuming that "the prophet" returned?

You have to keep in mind that back in those days, it was quite common to marry someone that young. Even most of your great grandparents married at this young of an age. Ask them. So imagine back in the era that Islam came about. It was a common occurrence. The poor families who could not afford to take care of their daughters needed to marry them off to someone who can look out and care for them. So no, because this took place so long ago I do not consider him a pedophile. However, in this day in age things have changed and it is not common in our society to so something like this, so no i would never allow my young children to get married let alone to a man so old. With that said, there are still many other countries where muslims and non-muslims still marry their daughters off at such a young age and it is accepted in their society.

Anonymous wrote:


I once read that men who want to have casual sex sometimes get "married" temporarily to their partners, and the marriage is either annulled shortly after fornication or has a defined period of validity (say 72 hours). Did I read this incorrectly?

This is something that I believe takes place in Iran among a certain sect of Muslims. It is more of a cultural belief than a religious one.

OP - do you believe in Jinns and Jinn possession?

Anonymous wrote:First cousin marriages are still legal in half of the US. Such marriages lead to an increase of birth defects from 3-4% of all births to 4-7% of all births, the same increased risk carried if the mother is AMA. I'm not advocating for it. It feels incestuous to me. But it's not intrinsically evil. 80% of all marriages/mating in human history have been between 2nd cousins or closer. Historically, there haven't been enough humans around throughout most of history, and we haven't been mobile enough to do much more than that.

It's not the one-off first cousins getting married that is so bad. It's when families CONTINUALLY marry their 1st cousins. Each time it happens, the risk of defects goes up. Just look at the amount of disabilities afflicting the Pakistani population in the UK compared to non-Pakistanis. It's very common in pakistani families for a couple's parents, grandparents, greatparents, and so on, to all have been first cousin marriages.

In Pakistan, over 80% of married couples are 1st cousins. Chances are, their parents and their parents' parents were also first cousins. Look at the high rate of thalassaemia in Pakistan.

http://www.pakistantoday.com.pk/2012/02/21/city/lahore/marrying-a-cousin-think-twice/

First cousin marriages are still legal in half of the US. Such marriages lead to an increase of birth defects from 3-4% of all births to 4-7% of all births, the same increased risk carried if the mother is AMA. I'm not advocating for it. It feels incestuous to me. But it's not intrinsically evil. 80% of all marriages/mating in human history have been between 2nd cousins or closer. Historically, there haven't been enough humans around throughout most of history, and we haven't been mobile enough to do much more than that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you feel about Muhammed marrying a 9 year old? Do you consider him a pedophile? If not, would you allow your 9yr old girl to marry a 50 something prophet (assuming that "the prophet" returned?

Does it bother you that Mary was 12 or 13 when she gave birth to Jesus?
You know even in the United States about 100 yrs ago it was normal for 12 and 13 yr olds to get married.

Maybe Aisha was a mature 9? Yes, 12/13 was the norm in those days, soon after their first period, but Aisha was 6 or 7 when actually married and then 9 when she moved in with her 53 year old husband (which was ANCIENT at that time).

not only do I know that in the US it was normal for a 12/13yr old to marry, but I EVEN know that in other parts of the world it is still the norm, but I'm not so sure where marrying and haivng sex with 9yr olds is the norm.

NP here. The age of Mary bothers me a LOT less than the ages of Muhammad and Aisha when they consummated their marriage. (Although, I'm not Christian). The reason being is because in Islam, Muhammad told his followers to emulate his life - follow Sunnah. Then, he goes and marries a 6 year old, while in his 50's, and consummates the marriage when she is 9. This is EXACTLY why child marriage is so difficult to eliminate. Muslims are told to live their lives as Muhammad did, so if you try to tell them that a 50 year old marrying a 9 year old is wrong and bad, you are basically saying that Muhammad was wrong and bad for doing it, and that's blasphemy/insulting the Prophet. Further, you can't just skirt the issue by saying, oh, that's just what was done back then, but we shouldn't do it anymore in this day and age, because Allah said that the rules of Islam are for all mankind and until the end of time. Marrying a tiny child to a man over 40 years her senior is gross and dangerous. The girl can end up injured from sex, and if she gives birth at such a young age, she could die, or end up with fistula and be shunned.

I don't believe in ANY religion. However, I just have to think that if there was a god, and he was all-knowing, he would know the dangers of marrying little girls to old men, and thus NOT command his Prophet to do a marriage like that.

Further, we know how bad the effects (genetic disorders, low IQ, disabilities, etc.) are of first cousins marrying eachother continuously down the lineage, which is extremely common with Pakistanis. If god is all-knowing, why wouldn't he have known about that and when he sent down the rules for who is marriagable in Islam, and forbid first cousins to marry?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is the divorce procedure of saying "I divorce you" 3 times available to the wife, too? Or does she follow a separate procedure?

Not OP but Another Muslim poster: I am not 100% certain on this but I believe that the wife only says it once and then applies to the court for a divorce. She does not need her husband's permission, nor does she have to prove anything in order to be granted the divorce. The rules surrounding this process in many countries today and the ways that women are discouraged to divorce or prevented from it these rules have been created by man and not by Islam.

To the Muslim poster: In shariah, the privilege to divorce is for the husband. There is no analogue to the husband-initiated divorce available to women. A woman who wants to divorce has two options:

a. Petition the court for separation called Khoula. In this scenario, she must return to the husband the dowry he paid her before contracting marriage. Some husbands also demand more for the inconvenience. By letter of law, this is supposed to be a simple transaction of "I don't want to be with you any longer, here's your money, I'm leaving", but in practice, some countries require the husband's consent. This must be approved by the judge, and cannot be transacted by a woman independently.

b. Petition the court for the court-approved divorce in case of husband's abandonment, maltreatment, non-payment of maintenance etc. In this scenario, the woman retains the dowry. In practice, the ruling to divorce is very much up to the judge, and very often women are told to go back home and practice patience.

To sum up: in classical shariah, there is no such thing as a woman-initiated divorce similar to what is available to the husband.

However, a woman can write in her marital agreement that she has a right to request divorce at any time and the husband must not withhold consent. She may write that she will retain her dowry in case of divorce. The marital agreement can contain pretty much whatever financial and contractual terms. If the husband changes his ind later on, she would still have to take him to court, and there is a possibility that the judge may consider some of the contract's provisions to be un-Islamic, but it's uncommon because Islam attaches much importance to following agreements and promises.

Are you allowed to give blood or receive blood transfusions? Become an organ donor or receive stem cell transplants?

not OP but:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religious_views_on_organ_donation

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've been wondering this ever since I moved to arlington.

What the heck is going on, noonish, Fridays on Leesburg Pike between 7 corners and Baily's crossroads.

EVERY SINGLE TAxi cab in the dc metro area is parked over there, there are cops, and burkas and men in pajama-looking cloths. and lots of normal looking people too but those are clues to me that this is indeed a question for a Muslim.

Namaste.

namaste to you do, but that's actually a greeting for hindus. one can say, "assalamu alaikum" which means "peace be on to you." i don't live in your area, but friday noon is the day of congregational prayers in Islam. just like sunday mass for catholics.

Yep, that are the poster was asking about is a location of one of the largest mosques in NoVA. The mosque has seen some controversy over the years. Anwar al-Aulaqi was an imam there back In 2000-2001. And 2 of the 9/11 hijackers attended services there as well as the Ft. Hood shooter. But generally it's a pretty popular mosque