Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:t's really interesting that "grinding" the verb doesn't have the negative baggage that "grinder" the noun has.

It's really not. American English has those kinds of subtleties, just like to "strive" doesn't come with the same baggage as being called a striver.

Strive/striver seems even a more of an extreme difference. As is trying hard/try-hard.

"Try-hard" has been used pejoratively for decades.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:t's really interesting that "grinding" the verb doesn't have the negative baggage that "grinder" the noun has.

It's really not. American English has those kinds of subtleties, just like to "strive" doesn't come with the same baggage as being called a striver.

Strive/striver seems even a more of an extreme difference. As is trying hard/try-hard.

Exactly but for those who don’t get colloquialisms won’t even understand that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:After 15 pages, I am still not getting it!

I think DD is a grinder or striver or whatever you call it. Prioritizes A+s, max rigor, test preps hard. This is all non-negotiable to her.

Also works hard at ECs, loves them, has a blast, does well. Has lots of friends she hangs out with. Loves hanging out with her little brother too. Obsessed with that show "Off campus" right now.

So she grinds, but not at the expense of everything else.

Is she a grinder/striver, or not?

I'm one of the folks who keeps trying to explain what the negative connotations are, but this appears to be falling on deaf ears. Probably, your DD is a bit of a grinder/striver, but as long as she's not going too far into the more negative aspects of being a grinder/striver, I think she should own it. Let's face it, why would any parent be looking at the College and University forum if we weren't all at least a little bit grindy/strivey, eh?

No. We don’t have enough information to assess.

If your daughter has a best friend invite her to Oc and she said yes but a new Acquaintance invites her to the champions a week later, does she go to OC or the Hampton?

OC not a striver
Hampton a striver

She applies to all top schools and a few safety schools. Gets into top schools but not merit money, does she act like a lunatic because she is forced to go to UVA?

Happily goes to UVA.., not a striver
Goes to UVA begrudgingly but tells everyone… but I got into Princeton but my parents can’t afford it… striver.

Anonymous wrote:ha my kid said they "had to grind" and I was just like "please tell me that doesn't mean what it meant in the 90s"

haha, I forgot about that entirely different meaning of grind.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:t's really interesting that "grinding" the verb doesn't have the negative baggage that "grinder" the noun has.

It's really not. American English has those kinds of subtleties, just like to "strive" doesn't come with the same baggage as being called a striver.

Strive/striver seems even a more of an extreme difference. As is trying hard/try-hard.