How many millennial men are willing & able to (a) be the sole provider so their wives can SAHM, or (b) take on 50% of house and kid responsibilities so their wives can also have a career? I guess option (c) is the men can SAHD but very few women are actually interested in that setup. There is your answer.

Anonymous wrote:I have three of these couples in my immediate family and it's a mix of reasons they don't want kids. All late 30s....
In one of them the man keeps putting it off until after their next "adventure" (international trips that are highly strenuous.) The woman seems baby-crazy based on how she interacts with my kids. There could be infertility there as well.
In another one the woman is adamant that she doesn't want to give birth because she has health problems. The man's mother is grandkid-obsessed and has offered to basically raise any progeny they have full-time, but that's not what they're worried about.
In the last one the woman doesn't even work due to her "mental health." She spends her days reading and doing yarn crafts while her husband makes $$$. They stated that they will not have children to do their part to fight global warming and called out "breeders" as selfish on social media.
The first two couples are lovely family members and not judgmental so I support any choice they make. The last one can enjoy their Friendsgiving into perpetuity.

Quite frankly we should be relieved that people like this aren't having kids.

I have three of these couples in my immediate family and it's a mix of reasons they don't want kids. All late 30s....
In one of them the man keeps putting it off until after their next "adventure" (international trips that are highly strenuous.) The woman seems baby-crazy based on how she interacts with my kids. There could be infertility there as well.
In another one the woman is adamant that she doesn't want to give birth because she has health problems. The man's mother is grandkid-obsessed and has offered to basically raise any progeny they have full-time, but that's not what they're worried about.
In the last one the woman doesn't even work due to her "mental health." She spends her days reading and doing yarn crafts while her husband makes $$$. They stated that they will not have children to do their part to fight global warming and called out "breeders" as selfish on social media.
The first two couples are lovely family members and not judgmental so I support any choice they make. The last one can enjoy their Friendsgiving into perpetuity.

The first five years with a kid is hard on all families. If you can't figure out a way to get through those first five years, then don't have kids. That's fine.

There are plenty of other families living in lower COL areas where a parent can stay home and parents are nearby and they are pumping out multiple children. It's about choices.

All this generational whining? Whatever. If that floats your boat.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a millennial and chalked up the lack of kids to being in a high-achieving cohort. Maybe half of us have kids? The other half aren't married. I don't many that are childless by choice (as far as I know). My friends both gay and straight that are married by in large have kids usually 2-3. But I myself hit total unexplained secondary infertility at 35 so have 2 kids but am unlikely to have 3.

My husband is in the military and in his friend group we only know 2 childless by choice couples. Most men have 1 if not 2 sets of kids by different women thanks to the damage the many years in war did on their personal lives.

This. I know maybe one or two childfree by choice couples. I am early 30s so not everyone has had kids yet, but my married friends either have them, are trying to have them, or will start trying soon (some from the second and third groups may not get them, but it won't be for lack of effort). The rest of my friends aren't married. They are interested in kids, but aren't sure it's going to happen for them.

I'm early 40's and this is my experience too. We have 1 kid, but only because of multiple losses trying for #2. All of my other friends and family have 2-3 kids, except for the very religious cohort that has 4-5 kids. I have a LOT of women friends who are unmarried, and would have liked to be a single mom by choice but didn't go for it because of the cost.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our system isn't set up for disabled, childless, family less adults. It'll be interesting to see how that all plays out.

and our current system is also not set up to support pregnant women, postpartum women, and children under the age of 5. Societally and culturally, children are treated horribly in the US and have effectively, no rights.

By “horribly” you mean not paying their expenses? You have no rights to the money of others to cover your expenses.

Yet country clubs, big business, billionaires, etc all get help and we "pay their expenses".

So you deserve help too? Because you exist and reproduced?

Everyone deserves help or nobody deserves help.

A civilization is only as good as how they treat their weakest members.

Anonymous wrote:I think a lot of these women are going to hit 40 and have IVF babies. I know several.

By then they're hopefully well off / established enough in their careers to afford children.

I think there may be some people who regret it or adopt/IVF later in life, BUTTTTT as society switches to cater to more childless families it will become less and less of a regret and more of a lifestyle choice that is valid and respected and even rewarded in our society and I am hear for it!

I think a lot of these women are going to hit 40 and have IVF babies. I know several.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our system isn't set up for disabled, childless, family less adults. It'll be interesting to see how that all plays out.

and our current system is also not set up to support pregnant women, postpartum women, and children under the age of 5. Societally and culturally, children are treated horribly in the US and have effectively, no rights.

By “horribly” you mean not paying their expenses? You have no rights to the money of others to cover your expenses.

Yet country clubs, big business, billionaires, etc all get help and we "pay their expenses".

So you deserve help too? Because you exist and reproduced?

The world and US could use less people. The (big) problem is the educated people with means are the ones deciding not to have kids or have fewer. While the poor and uneducated are multiplying by a lot

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our system isn't set up for disabled, childless, family less adults. It'll be interesting to see how that all plays out.

and our current system is also not set up to support pregnant women, postpartum women, and children under the age of 5. Societally and culturally, children are treated horribly in the US and have effectively, no rights.

By “horribly” you mean not paying their expenses? You have no rights to the money of others to cover your expenses.

Yet country clubs, big business, billionaires, etc all get help and we "pay their expenses".

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our system isn't set up for disabled, childless, family less adults. It'll be interesting to see how that all plays out.

and our current system is also not set up to support pregnant women, postpartum women, and children under the age of 5. Societally and culturally, children are treated horribly in the US and have effectively, no rights.

By “horribly” you mean not paying their expenses? You have no rights to the money of others to cover your expenses.

Anonymous wrote:Our system isn't set up for disabled, childless, family less adults. It'll be interesting to see how that all plays out.

and our current system is also not set up to support pregnant women, postpartum women, and children under the age of 5. Societally and culturally, children are treated horribly in the US and have effectively, no rights.

Our system isn't set up for disabled, childless, family less adults. It'll be interesting to see how that all plays out.