Anonymous
Post 01/27/2023 09:09     Subject: Check your phone at the door
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Wow, I am in a weird place with this thread. On one hand, I think it's absurd to force kids to give up their phones, especially as they get older. I can't decide if it's infantalizing them, and expecting they do do things much younger than age-appropriate, or Boomer-esque by assuming they will sit around and chat like Grandma does before her bridge game.

On the other hand, I think the people who insist that their kids never, ever be separated from their phones because they have to be able to be contacted all the time, or because here may be a scary dog, or someone might be mean to them, or whatever other nonsense they have come up with are equally, if not more ridiculous.

So, I guess I have no home. Verdict, ESH.


Please. How often do you leave the house without YOUR phone? I could question you on all the reasons you think you might need a cell phone when you go somewhere and it would be just as silly. And none of my business.


They are on electronics posting this.


If the posters are posting while they are the in middle of social gathering that is rude and speaks to a larger problem. If they are posting by themselves, then how is that relevant to our discussion here?

What social gathering do you go to where the host takes your phone?


Do you think the phone will be sold as soon as it's "taken"? What exactly are you so worried about? If someone at the house really meant to harm your kid you know they actually would take the phone and not even put it in a communal spot that is easily accessible, right?


The particular comments you are responding to are about the PARENTS’ use of phones not a teen’s. Teens carry phones when they leave the home for the same reasons adults do.


And adults are often asked to turn off or mute their phones. You're probably the jerk who doesn't because you're above the rules and nobody's gonna be the boss of you!


If I was invited to someone’s house and they asked me to turn off my phone, I would turn around and leave. That would be truly bizarre.


There are several times when I've gone out to eat with people and they're on their phone. I'm RIGHT HERE! And I've said to them "Everything okay in there?" in a jokey way. Once I just got up and said "It seems like you're too busy for us to hang out today. Why don't you call me when you're ready to reschedule?" and walked out. Don't go to a lunch with someone and spend the bulk of the time on your phone. Don't go to a party and sit alone on your phone. It's SO rude. It's one thing to step away and take a call from your kid, or answer a quick work call/text. But to play games on your phone, or scroll through Instagram? I'm not spending my time with someone doing that.


The two situation at play in your post are not remotely the same.
Anonymous
Post 01/27/2023 09:07     Subject: Re:Check your phone at the door
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
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Anonymous wrote:My kid would know to refuse and to call me.


such a rebel.


Not a rebel. But kid has appropriate boundaries.


How do you spell "infantalizing"?


You spell it “infantilizing.”


Thanks. Now stop doing it. Your DC doesn't need an electronic tether to you.


You don't get to tell me what my kid needs. That's the end of it, really.
Anonymous
Post 01/27/2023 08:17     Subject: Check your phone at the door
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don’t get why you’d take another kids phone?
If you don’t want kids on their phones, just tell them that.


Are you the type of person in work meetings that always say they don't understand something even after it was explained easy enough for a toddler to understand?

No one takes kid's phones. They invite friends over for a screen free night. They can come and drop off their phone (and use if needed) or not come at all. It's a choice.


A screen free night yet they can watch a movie?! Huh.
Anonymous
Post 01/27/2023 07:53     Subject: Check your phone at the door
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This (having my kid leave phone in a basket by the door) would bother me, but I’m not exactly sure why, because I understand the reasoning behind it.


I would question the motives of a parent who wanted to host my kid, but wanted to make sure I had no way to get in touch with my child and my child had no way to get in touch with me. Are you planning on abusing them in some way and don't want them to be able to get in touch with their parents? This seems weird and controlling.


This is completely rational. Despite the intense blowback someone is applying.
Anonymous
Post 01/27/2023 07:37     Subject: Check your phone at the door
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don’t get why you’d take another kids phone?
If you don’t want kids on their phones, just tell them that.


Are you the type of person in work meetings that always say they don't understand something even after it was explained easy enough for a toddler to understand?

No one takes kid's phones. They invite friends over for a screen free night. They can come and drop off their phone (and use if needed) or not come at all. It's a choice.


This is the same thing, though at least this way parents get the heads up.

OP, Hope this thread has helped, even if it’s just knowing that there are parents who feel strongly on both sides.
Happy Friday everyone!
Anonymous
Post 01/27/2023 00:57     Subject: Check your phone at the door
Anonymous wrote:I don’t get why you’d take another kids phone?
If you don’t want kids on their phones, just tell them that.


Are you the type of person in work meetings that always say they don't understand something even after it was explained easy enough for a toddler to understand?

No one takes kid's phones. They invite friends over for a screen free night. They can come and drop off their phone (and use if needed) or not come at all. It's a choice.
Anonymous
Post 01/27/2023 00:50     Subject: Check your phone at the door
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This (having my kid leave phone in a basket by the door) would bother me, but I’m not exactly sure why, because I understand the reasoning behind it.


I would question the motives of a parent who wanted to host my kid, but wanted to make sure I had no way to get in touch with my child and my child had no way to get in touch with me. Are you planning on abusing them in some way and don't want them to be able to get in touch with their parents? This seems weird and controlling.


I bet you're the mom who likes to call your teen up during school just to have some 'girl chat'. And if somehow they break out of your grasp for the evening to go to a movie with friends, you call during Avatar to 'check out how they like the movie'.
Anonymous
Post 01/27/2023 00:04     Subject: Check your phone at the door
When my kids friends are over it is never quiet. Ever! They're always talking, laughing, singing. Even with phones nearby.

I won't take them away as they walk in the door. That seems weird.
Anonymous
Post 01/27/2023 00:02     Subject: Check your phone at the door
I kinda get the temptation, but would never in a million years do it. If your kid doesn’t want their friends on their phones, let them deal with it.
Anonymous
Post 01/26/2023 22:08     Subject: Re:Check your phone at the door
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My kid would know to refuse and to call me.


such a rebel.


Not a rebel. But kid has appropriate boundaries.


How do you spell "infantalizing"?


You spell it “infantilizing.”


Thanks. Now stop doing it. Your DC doesn't need an electronic tether to you.
Anonymous
Post 01/26/2023 22:04     Subject: Check your phone at the door
I don’t get why you’d take another kids phone?
If you don’t want kids on their phones, just tell them that.
Anonymous
Post 01/26/2023 22:00     Subject: Re:Check your phone at the door
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My kid would know to refuse and to call me.


such a rebel.


Not a rebel. But kid has appropriate boundaries.


How do you spell "infantalizing"?


You spell it “infantilizing.”
Anonymous
Post 01/26/2023 21:58     Subject: Check your phone at the door
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This (having my kid leave phone in a basket by the door) would bother me, but I’m not exactly sure why, because I understand the reasoning behind it.


I would question the motives of a parent who wanted to host my kid, but wanted to make sure I had no way to get in touch with my child and my child had no way to get in touch with me. Are you planning on abusing them in some way and don't want them to be able to get in touch with their parents? This seems weird and controlling.


How did you survive your own childhood?
Anonymous
Post 01/26/2023 21:57     Subject: Check your phone at the door
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:No one can see porn in my house if their phone is with me. That’s my reasoning.


Can you block Wi-Fi access for guests?


Cell phones do not need wifi
Anonymous
Post 01/26/2023 21:56     Subject: Check your phone at the door
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This (having my kid leave phone in a basket by the door) would bother me, but I’m not exactly sure why, because I understand the reasoning behind it.


I would question the motives of a parent who wanted to host my kid, but wanted to make sure I had no way to get in touch with my child and my child had no way to get in touch with me. Are you planning on abusing them in some way and don't want them to be able to get in touch with their parents? This seems weird and controlling.


The irony of this post is astounding