Anonymous wrote:I have had one very bad vaginal birth with forceps that shredded my pelvic floor, and one scheduled C section. If I could go back and do it again, I would have had two scheduled C sections. Dealing with major pelvic organ prolapse in my 30s has destroyed my self confidence, sex life, quality of life, and ability to be active. Oh and I have urinary incontinence now and can’t poop properly either. The rest of my life—until I die— will now suck because a bunch of stupid midwives and a moronic natural childbirth instructor made me terrified of C sections. Now I can’t chase my children or stand in line or walk without my vagina basically trying to turn itself inside out. My bladder is basically falling out the front wall of the vagina and the rectum is pushing into and falling out the back wall. It feels like someone basically blasted a hole into my crotch, all the time, and my pelvic organs are falling out through the hole. It’s horrifying and disgusting and makes me
Feel disfigured. Tampons just fall out now - even the biggest size - and water gushes inside me when I swim
Or bathe and then slowly drips out when I get out. I have to wear maxi pads because there’s no muscle left to
Hold in a cup or disk. And Don’t get me started about the problems with sex. Pelvic PT can’t fix this and the only solution modern medicine has is a massive pessary that is incredibly uncomfortable and hurts or major reconstructive surgery with a high failure rate and requiring at least 6 months to a year to be fully recovered. So yeah, I would take all the risks of a C section twice over if I didnt have to live this way.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have had one very bad vaginal birth with forceps that shredded my pelvic floor, and one scheduled C section. If I could go back and do it again, I would have had two scheduled C sections. Dealing with major pelvic organ prolapse in my 30s has destroyed my self confidence, sex life, quality of life, and ability to be active. Oh and I have urinary incontinence now and can’t poop properly either. The rest of my life—until I die— will now suck because a bunch of stupid midwives and a moronic natural childbirth instructor made me terrified of C sections. Now I can’t chase my children or stand in line or walk without my vagina basically trying to turn itself inside out. My bladder is basically falling out the front wall of the vagina and the rectum is pushing into and falling out the back wall. It feels like someone basically blasted a hole into my crotch, all the time, and my pelvic organs are falling out through the hole. It’s horrifying and disgusting and makes me
Feel disfigured. Tampons just fall out now - even the biggest size - and water gushes inside me when I swim
Or bathe and then slowly drips out when I get out. I have to wear maxi pads because there’s no muscle left to
Hold in a cup or disk. And Don’t get me started about the problems with sex. Pelvic PT can’t fix this and the only solution modern medicine has is a massive pessary that is incredibly uncomfortable and hurts or major reconstructive surgery with a high failure rate and requiring at least 6 months to a year to be fully recovered. So yeah, I would take all the risks of a C section twice over if I didnt have to live this way.

A major criticism of obstetrics that I have is that these topics need to be discussed well in advance before the s**t starts swirling the toilet. Once you are in hard labor and baby is going into distress, informed consent cannot be given. You do not have time to research the topic or to get a second opinion. I got a very informative VBAC informed consent paper that laid out all the pros and cons and risk and mitigating factors. Every prospective vaginal birth patient should be presented with such a document and scenarios where pink flags start appearing. At what point do you pull the trigger on a C section? I am pro vaginal birth but I do agree there are scenarios where a C section would have been better. The decision to convert to a C needs to happen while it is still a pink flag situation. Once it is a red flag situation the decision is made for you (i.e. likely whatever is faster).

This is why I had a doula. My MIL once derisively said when she gave birth she didn’t need a doula, but no one knows if they will need an advocate and a husband who has witnessed either no or maybe one other births is not going to be able to advocate effectively. You wouldn’t go to court without a lawyer, why would you give birth without a doula? I don’t understand their underutilization when so many north outcomes and experiences in the US are so bad.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have had one very bad vaginal birth with forceps that shredded my pelvic floor, and one scheduled C section. If I could go back and do it again, I would have had two scheduled C sections. Dealing with major pelvic organ prolapse in my 30s has destroyed my self confidence, sex life, quality of life, and ability to be active. Oh and I have urinary incontinence now and can’t poop properly either. The rest of my life—until I die— will now suck because a bunch of stupid midwives and a moronic natural childbirth instructor made me terrified of C sections. Now I can’t chase my children or stand in line or walk without my vagina basically trying to turn itself inside out. My bladder is basically falling out the front wall of the vagina and the rectum is pushing into and falling out the back wall. It feels like someone basically blasted a hole into my crotch, all the time, and my pelvic organs are falling out through the hole. It’s horrifying and disgusting and makes me
Feel disfigured. Tampons just fall out now - even the biggest size - and water gushes inside me when I swim
Or bathe and then slowly drips out when I get out. I have to wear maxi pads because there’s no muscle left to
Hold in a cup or disk. And Don’t get me started about the problems with sex. Pelvic PT can’t fix this and the only solution modern medicine has is a massive pessary that is incredibly uncomfortable and hurts or major reconstructive surgery with a high failure rate and requiring at least 6 months to a year to be fully recovered. So yeah, I would take all the risks of a C section twice over if I didnt have to live this way.

A major criticism of obstetrics that I have is that these topics need to be discussed well in advance before the s**t starts swirling the toilet. Once you are in hard labor and baby is going into distress, informed consent cannot be given. You do not have time to research the topic or to get a second opinion. I got a very informative VBAC informed consent paper that laid out all the pros and cons and risk and mitigating factors. Every prospective vaginal birth patient should be presented with such a document and scenarios where pink flags start appearing. At what point do you pull the trigger on a C section? I am pro vaginal birth but I do agree there are scenarios where a C section would have been better. The decision to convert to a C needs to happen while it is still a pink flag situation. Once it is a red flag situation the decision is made for you (i.e. likely whatever is faster).

This is why I had a doula. My MIL once derisively said when she gave birth she didn’t need a doula, but no one knows if they will need an advocate and a husband who has witnessed either no or maybe one other births is not going to be able to advocate effectively. You wouldn’t go to court without a lawyer, why would you give birth without a doula? I don’t understand their underutilization when so many north outcomes and experiences in the US are so bad.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have had one very bad vaginal birth with forceps that shredded my pelvic floor, and one scheduled C section. If I could go back and do it again, I would have had two scheduled C sections. Dealing with major pelvic organ prolapse in my 30s has destroyed my self confidence, sex life, quality of life, and ability to be active. Oh and I have urinary incontinence now and can’t poop properly either. The rest of my life—until I die— will now suck because a bunch of stupid midwives and a moronic natural childbirth instructor made me terrified of C sections. Now I can’t chase my children or stand in line or walk without my vagina basically trying to turn itself inside out. My bladder is basically falling out the front wall of the vagina and the rectum is pushing into and falling out the back wall. It feels like someone basically blasted a hole into my crotch, all the time, and my pelvic organs are falling out through the hole. It’s horrifying and disgusting and makes me
Feel disfigured. Tampons just fall out now - even the biggest size - and water gushes inside me when I swim
Or bathe and then slowly drips out when I get out. I have to wear maxi pads because there’s no muscle left to
Hold in a cup or disk. And Don’t get me started about the problems with sex. Pelvic PT can’t fix this and the only solution modern medicine has is a massive pessary that is incredibly uncomfortable and hurts or major reconstructive surgery with a high failure rate and requiring at least 6 months to a year to be fully recovered. So yeah, I would take all the risks of a C section twice over if I didnt have to live this way.

A major criticism of obstetrics that I have is that these topics need to be discussed well in advance before the s**t starts swirling the toilet. Once you are in hard labor and baby is going into distress, informed consent cannot be given. You do not have time to research the topic or to get a second opinion. I got a very informative VBAC informed consent paper that laid out all the pros and cons and risk and mitigating factors. Every prospective vaginal birth patient should be presented with such a document and scenarios where pink flags start appearing. At what point do you pull the trigger on a C section? I am pro vaginal birth but I do agree there are scenarios where a C section would have been better. The decision to convert to a C needs to happen while it is still a pink flag situation. Once it is a red flag situation the decision is made for you (i.e. likely whatever is faster).

Anonymous wrote:Curious why C-Sections are seen as such a bad thing. I delivered vaginally for my first and it was awful. My care team was great, I just hated everything about the entire process. Seemed like a whole lot of waiting around and being in pain. And I ended up needing an episiotomy and extraction anyway, which then resulted in a bunch of scar tissue that caused problems.

Now that I'm pregnant with my second, a C section sounds pretty darn good. No labor, just go in and get the whole thing done and over with in 15 minutes. I know there's recovery, but recovery from vaginal birth sucked, too. And I know it's surgery, so there are risks associated with that, but from talking with my OB it sounds like it's a very, very small increase of risk.

So why exactly are c-sections seen as so horrible?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t want the scar

Scheduled C here. My doctor did my scar in my bikini line, it’s tiny, about 3 inches, and you cannot see it. You have to palpate the skin to locate it, it’s that unnoticeable. The photo shared earlier is not representative of most scars.

Anonymous wrote:I have had one very bad vaginal birth with forceps that shredded my pelvic floor, and one scheduled C section. If I could go back and do it again, I would have had two scheduled C sections. Dealing with major pelvic organ prolapse in my 30s has destroyed my self confidence, sex life, quality of life, and ability to be active. Oh and I have urinary incontinence now and can’t poop properly either. The rest of my life—until I die— will now suck because a bunch of stupid midwives and a moronic natural childbirth instructor made me terrified of C sections. Now I can’t chase my children or stand in line or walk without my vagina basically trying to turn itself inside out. My bladder is basically falling out the front wall of the vagina and the rectum is pushing into and falling out the back wall. It feels like someone basically blasted a hole into my crotch, all the time, and my pelvic organs are falling out through the hole. It’s horrifying and disgusting and makes me
Feel disfigured. Tampons just fall out now - even the biggest size - and water gushes inside me when I swim
Or bathe and then slowly drips out when I get out. I have to wear maxi pads because there’s no muscle left to
Hold in a cup or disk. And Don’t get me started about the problems with sex. Pelvic PT can’t fix this and the only solution modern medicine has is a massive pessary that is incredibly uncomfortable and hurts or major reconstructive surgery with a high failure rate and requiring at least 6 months to a year to be fully recovered. So yeah, I would take all the risks of a C section twice over if I didnt have to live this way.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t want the scar

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:--Abdominal surgery is a big deal, though they play it down. The surgery is lucrative for hospitals, and they have to keep the an anesthesiologist paid.

--Births in the US are not done well. Last I knew, we had a higher mortality rate than other similar nations.

--If men could give birth, they wouldn't make so light of surgery.

--If you prefer the surgery, go for what works for you. The hospital would likely prefer it, too. More revenue for them.

What is so amazing to me is how much it’s downplayed. It is major surgery! I had a C-section in 2015 and hemorrhaged, required a blood transfusion….and I felt so horrible - the recovery was so much worse than I realized.

Anonymous wrote:My friend is a plastic surgeon and told me that it’s the bottom of the barrel medical school students that end up as obgyns. She told me that this is a generalization and generally true. She also said in her industry everyone has their plastic surgeon buddy come in to do the c section sew up and never the obgyn because they suck at it and butcher women. This is basically the language she used.

Anonymous wrote:--Abdominal surgery is a big deal, though they play it down. The surgery is lucrative for hospitals, and they have to keep the an anesthesiologist paid.

--Births in the US are not done well. Last I knew, we had a higher mortality rate than other similar nations.

--If men could give birth, they wouldn't make so light of surgery.

--If you prefer the surgery, go for what works for you. The hospital would likely prefer it, too. More revenue for them.