Anonymous
Post 07/23/2020 15:07     Subject: How do you tell a child they life they knew is over?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:So... mine is 6 too. We talk about it a lot, but in a certain way. Factual but light...we set the tone, they adopt it. "yeah this might be one really weird school year! but one out of life isnt that bad right? at least we get to hang out!" "Its so awesome we have zoom to talk to grandpa during the germ problem, imagine if we didnt!" and I tell them we do not know if a vaccine will come for years, but, the scientists are working and will probably find some good treatments and things will ease up in a year. We have sprinkled these comments throughout the last few months adn it has helped. At first they thought it would be better by summer, but now they know its taking longer and we all just float on.


Problem is, DH is telling her we can go see people next summer without masks. This is super irresponsible since we all know the restrictions won't ever be lifted, but I'm the one who'll get to comfort a crying child when she finds out he lied, so what does he care?


Huh? We all know restrictions won’t ever be lifted???

OP, I say this as gently as possible. You are not well. You need to talk to a counselor.

We need to stop gaslighting the OP. She has valid concerns and maybe just needs some perspective. We’re not helping her by belittling her telling her she is unwell.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2020 15:07     Subject: How do you tell a child they life they knew is over?
Anonymous wrote:Where exactly is this op living?!


Inside a prison of her own making.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2020 15:05     Subject: How do you tell a child they life they knew is over?
Re-read The Diary of Anne Frank then get a grip.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2020 15:03     Subject: How do you tell a child they life they knew is over?
One day she will be able to do these things again. This is so oddly and over the top dramatic. Put it ways she can understand and adapt to things she will enjoy (ie a socially distant picnic with a friend). And say : “There WILL be school again one day and you WILL be able to see grandparents again, just not right now until the germs go away. In the meantime, we are all safe at home. “

Also she is six. She will barely remember this in the long term. Perspective!




Anonymous wrote:DD (6) thinks things will go back to normal soon. She obviously can't grasp the full impact of the situation yet, and thinks that one day she'll be able to see her grandparents, not a wear a mask, travel, hug friends, attend school. I've been very non-committal about the future because I don't want to negatively affect her mental health, but at some point she'll need to understand that things are different now and won't ever go back. I'm actually wondering if I'm doing her a disservice by putting it off, but I'm dreading it.

Anyway, how and when do you plan on having this conversation?
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2020 14:56     Subject: How do you tell a child they life they knew is over?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:So... mine is 6 too. We talk about it a lot, but in a certain way. Factual but light...we set the tone, they adopt it. "yeah this might be one really weird school year! but one out of life isnt that bad right? at least we get to hang out!" "Its so awesome we have zoom to talk to grandpa during the germ problem, imagine if we didnt!" and I tell them we do not know if a vaccine will come for years, but, the scientists are working and will probably find some good treatments and things will ease up in a year. We have sprinkled these comments throughout the last few months adn it has helped. At first they thought it would be better by summer, but now they know its taking longer and we all just float on.


Problem is, DH is telling her we can go see people next summer without masks. This is super irresponsible since we all know the restrictions won't ever be lifted, but I'm the one who'll get to comfort a crying child when she finds out he lied, so what does he care?


Huh? We all know restrictions won’t ever be lifted???

OP, I say this as gently as possible. You are not well. You need to talk to a counselor.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2020 14:52     Subject: How do you tell a child they life they knew is over?
Prozac is not called a miracle drug for nothing.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2020 14:31     Subject: Re:How do you tell a child they life they knew is over?
Children are amazingly adaptable and resilient. My now 10 yo was ill when she was 5 and 6 and needed to wear a mask when no one else did for almost 2 years. At the same time we moved cross country and most of her interactions with her grandparents went from live to skype. She’s absolutely fine. And if we have to wear masks all the time going forward? She’ll be fine.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2020 14:26     Subject: How do you tell a child they life they knew is over?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Where exactly is this op living?!


New Mexico

So out of 2 million people they have less than 20K cases? Sounds like a place we should all praise for handling the pandemic.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2020 14:26     Subject: How do you tell a child they life they knew is over?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Where exactly is this op living?!


New Mexico


No. That’s where the grandparents they will never see again live.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2020 14:25     Subject: Re:How do you tell a child they life they knew is over?
I get the sense that OP is very young (like 24 or younger)
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2020 14:23     Subject: How do you tell a child they life they knew is over?
Anonymous wrote:Where exactly is this op living?!


New Mexico
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2020 14:20     Subject: How do you tell a child they life they knew is over?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:How many of you grew up with drama ocd queens like op?


New normal. Say it with me. It means permanent.

Perhaps you also have cognitive issues? You keep repeating yourself over and over. Does not make it true.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2020 14:19     Subject: Re:How do you tell a child they life they knew is over?
OP could you maybe plan a little trip to go visit friends/family/siblings, or just a trip to the beach to get away and relax
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2020 14:17     Subject: How do you tell a child they life they knew is over?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:acknowledge feelings, acknowledge feelings, acknowledge feelings. kids need to learn how to deal with these and become emotionally intelligent. part of the reason we are in this mess is that many (upper middle class) Americans are poorly equipped to deal with adversity and we try to titanic and/or "be positive" our way out of it. acknowledge feelings, give kids the tools to deal with their feelings, and then reflect.


We're not UMC. Quit projecting.


The advice doesn’t depend on being UMC. Ignore it at your own risk.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2020 14:13     Subject: How do you tell a child they life they knew is over?
Anonymous wrote:How many of you grew up with drama ocd queens like op?


Praise Jesus, no. It seems crazy and destabilizing. Poor kid.