A thread asks what men think makes women attractive. They answer & are called disgusting. You can see why men so often just keep quiet in real life. Then women ask "why doesn't he like me." And their friends give them incorrect answers in response. "Your hair looks sassy!" And so forth.

Anonymous wrote:I'm 36 and I have no interest in dating for many of the reasons stated above. This threat is disgusting.

I'm 26 and feel the same. So many of the "men" on DCUM are flat out losers. This thread is proof.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You know, some women gain weight when married not because they are lazy and selfish in at their comfort weight, but because they fall into a depression and have low self esteem caused by a very bad marriage. I didn't even know I was having depression issues until I saw a therapist post separation. I did put on some weight the first several years of marriage as did my ex because we enjoyed way too much food together. but he punished me for it, punished me dearly. It has taken a lot of therapy to regain my self esteem and the food seeking part of me is fading away.

People make all kinds of excuses for weight gain, but it all comes back to the individual who eats more calories than burn.
You blame your marriage and your ex for your weight. Easier to blame others than to take responsibility for ourselves.
Here's an alternative theory: your marriage was damaged by your weight gain, the physical attraction was no longer binding you together.
Don't believe that? Well this is exactly the case in my house.

So I see you don't believe that the added burdens of childcare and housework should take any more hours of your day?

What does that have to do with anything? The posts above are about eating to relieve depression.

Of course having children and running a home take time. what does that have to do with weight gain? Or Depression, or abuse?

Just trying to understand your point.

I'm not responding to the post at the very top, only to the immediately preceding one that claims it's all about personal responsibility.

What does having children and running a home have to do with weight gain? Do you really need to be told. Pre-children, I clocked 10 hrs of gym time a week. Post-children, that time doesn't exist any more. I can cut down on food but it's not the same, plus deprivation all the time just gets old. Childbirth changes bodies. I can't stop gravity. The simple fact of the matter is that pre-marriage and children, I simply had more time for personal maintenance. I'm sure someone can chime in to say I get up at 4 am to get my workout on, but I'd rather be fat and sleep. After all, no one gets into car accidents from being 20 pounds heavier, but tons of people were killed when they dozed off at the wheel.

I'm 36 and I have no interest in dating for many of the reasons stated above. This threat is disgusting.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Laziness is the fucking cause of fatness in men and women. Only women seem to want to blame everything but their over eating (such as blaming thyroids and such). At least men can admit to being the pigs that they are.

Ladies, stop eating so many thyroids.

lol good one

Well, it looks like I now know why so many of my single female friends are not interested in dating. My one friend, who is actually thin and super in-shape (military bootcamp workouts 5 days a week) tells me that she has had so many bad experiences with jerks she has basically given up dating her in 40s. Got a cat.

Anonymous wrote:Laziness is the fucking cause of fatness in men and women. Only women seem to want to blame everything but their over eating (such as blaming thyroids and such). At least men can admit to being the pigs that they are.

Ladies, stop eating so many thyroids.

lol good one

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You know, some women gain weight when married not because they are lazy and selfish in at their comfort weight, but because they fall into a depression and have low self esteem caused by a very bad marriage. I didn't even know I was having depression issues until I saw a therapist post separation. I did put on some weight the first several years of marriage as did my ex because we enjoyed way too much food together. but he punished me for it, punished me dearly. It has taken a lot of therapy to regain my self esteem and the food seeking part of me is fading away.

People make all kinds of excuses for weight gain, but it all comes back to the individual who eats more calories than burn.
You blame your marriage and your ex for your weight. Easier to blame others than to take responsibility for ourselves.
Here's an alternative theory: your marriage was damaged by your weight gain, the physical attraction was no longer binding you together.
Don't believe that? Well this is exactly the case in my house.

So I see you don't believe that the added burdens of childcare and housework should take any more hours of your day?

What does that have to do with anything? The posts above are about eating to relieve depression.

Of course having children and running a home take time. what does that have to do with weight gain? Or Depression, or abuse?

Just trying to understand your point.

Laziness is the fucking cause of fatness in men and women. Only women seem to want to blame everything but their over eating (such as blaming thyroids and such). At least men can admit to being the pigs that they are.

Ladies, stop eating so many thyroids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You know, some women gain weight when married not because they are lazy and selfish in at their comfort weight, but because they fall into a depression and have low self esteem caused by a very bad marriage. I didn't even know I was having depression issues until I saw a therapist post separation. I did put on some weight the first several years of marriage as did my ex because we enjoyed way too much food together. but he punished me for it, punished me dearly. It has taken a lot of therapy to regain my self esteem and the food seeking part of me is fading away.

People make all kinds of excuses for weight gain, but it all comes back to the individual who eats more calories than burn.
You blame your marriage and your ex for your weight. Easier to blame others than to take responsibility for ourselves.
Here's an alternative theory: your marriage was damaged by your weight gain, the physical attraction was no longer binding you together.
Don't believe that? Well this is exactly the case in my house.

So I see you don't believe that the added burdens of childcare and housework should take any more hours of your day?

Be open and honest and don't be a dyed blonde.

Anonymous wrote:Lets use this thread to have the wonderful gentleman on here talk about what they think makes women more attractive to them. Gentlemen, what can us women do to make ourselves more attractive to you? Have longer hair? Wear more dresses? Nag less? etc.

Is it how can "us" women or how can "we" women? Use well grammar.

FWIW, It is irresistable when a women enters my personal space and gently, kind of mindlessly strokes my forearm during conversation.

Sorry, but when you come home from work every night and your husband curses you and hits you, that can definitely make someone withdraw and become clinically depressed. Yes, I ate the food, but it helped me survive 8 years of physical and mental abuse.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You know, some women gain weight when married not because they are lazy and selfish in at their comfort weight, but because they fall into a depression and have low self esteem caused by a very bad marriage. I didn't even know I was having depression issues until I saw a therapist post separation. I did put on some weight the first several years of marriage as did my ex because we enjoyed way too much food together. but he punished me for it, punished me dearly. It has taken a lot of therapy to regain my self esteem and the food seeking part of me is fading away.

People make all kinds of excuses for weight gain, but it all comes back to the individual who eats more calories than burn.
You blame your marriage and your ex for your weight. Easier to blame others than to take responsibility for ourselves.
Here's an alternative theory: your marriage was damaged by your weight gain, the physical attraction was no longer binding you together.
Don't believe that? Well this is exactly the case in my house.

I'm sorry you're wife got too fat for you. Do you really need to project your issues on everyone else? You like what you like, others may like something else.

Anonymous wrote:You know, some women gain weight when married not because they are lazy and selfish in at their comfort weight, but because they fall into a depression and have low self esteem caused by a very bad marriage. I didn't even know I was having depression issues until I saw a therapist post separation. I did put on some weight the first several years of marriage as did my ex because we enjoyed way too much food together. but he punished me for it, punished me dearly. It has taken a lot of therapy to regain my self esteem and the food seeking part of me is fading away.

People make all kinds of excuses for weight gain, but it all comes back to the individual who eats more calories than burn.
You blame your marriage and your ex for your weight. Easier to blame others than to take responsibility for ourselves.
Here's an alternative theory: your marriage was damaged by your weight gain, the physical attraction was no longer binding you together.
Don't believe that? Well this is exactly the case in my house.