Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So all you moms see nothing wrong with the girls posting nude selfies on social media? I wouldn't be surprised to hear that the girls sent them directly to the Dropbox themselves. Without the girls' naked pics, the boys would have been playing Call of Duty.

Another misogynistic attempt to blame the girls for leading the poor, innocent boys astray. One can't help but wonder if this is the general atmosphere at the high school involved in this case or just the attitude of a few individuals?

If you want the girls to take responsibility for their possible actions you need to accept that the actions of the boys were far more blame-worthy. It took time and effort to put this site together. The difference in the level of culpability has been noted numerous times. It does a child no favors to make excuses and blame others for their actions.

"It does a child no favors to make excuses and blame others for their actions." This applies equally to the girls.

Sorry, but it only applies equally if the girls both took the pictures themselves and then put them together into a website and circulated links so others could view them. At this time, there is nothing in the news indicating the girls took the pictures themselves and two boys are being investigated for starting, owning, and/or operating the website where 52 folders of pictures, 24 of which were labeled with names, were found.
It does not appear that the boys in question were dragged or forced in any way to keep, organize, and distribute these pictures. The people in the pictures were held up for embarrassment and have been placed in danger.
It is much worse to embarrass others and put people in danger than it is to do something foolish thinking someone is romantically interested in you. In terms of character, it is far worse to take advantage of another's vulnerability to put them in a position of embarrassment and possible danger.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will flat out say it. I blame the boys more than the girls if the girls did not intend for the pictures to become public. While I would prefer that my daughter not send her boyfriend naked pictures, I see that as way more acceptable in the context of a loving relationship (or what she mistakenly thinks is a loving relationship -- weren't we all in love in high school) than breaching your girlfriend's trust and circulating or posting pictures for all to see.

Please teach your kids that when they post on the internet, they have no expectation of privacy.

What about when they send something in a private email? Still no expectation of privacy?

Unfortunately, no one should expect total privacy in an email. Think of "e-mail" as "evidence mail" and it will change what you decide to put into a document that is essentially a forever document that once it is sent you have no control over any longer.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So all you moms see nothing wrong with the girls posting nude selfies on social media? I wouldn't be surprised to hear that the girls sent them directly to the Dropbox themselves. Without the girls' naked pics, the boys would have been playing Call of Duty.

Another misogynistic attempt to blame the girls for leading the poor, innocent boys astray. One can't help but wonder if this is the general atmosphere at the high school involved in this case or just the attitude of a few individuals?

If you want the girls to take responsibility for their possible actions you need to accept that the actions of the boys were far more blame-worthy. It took time and effort to put this site together. The difference in the level of culpability has been noted numerous times. It does a child no favors to make excuses and blame others for their actions.

"It does a child no favors to make excuses and blame others for their actions." This applies equally to the girls.

Anonymous wrote:We know the family of the younger boy personally and I can tell you, he is an absolutely wonderful kid...a wonderful kid who did something incredibly stupid. He comes from a great family where both parents are extremely involved as both parents and in the community. In no way do I excuse any of it, but the girls put these pictures out knowingly and willingly. For anyone to say that it is just the act of these one or two boys is simply not true. It was the act of many, on both sides. Q

You're just going to have to excuse me but no, he is clearly NOT a wonderful kid and he has clearly NOT been taught proper respect or morals. Your friends are an epic example of parenting failure. Accept it - your friends are not as great as they may seem. Not even close.

And yet, if the girls had just refrained from sharing their naked pics on social media we wouldn't be arguing relative culpability.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So all you moms see nothing wrong with the girls posting nude selfies on social media? I wouldn't be surprised to hear that the girls sent them directly to the Dropbox themselves. Without the girls' naked pics, the boys would have been playing Call of Duty.

I imagine you're the type of person who believes a woman who was raped "asked for it" by wearing a skirt.

Not the PP, but the trashiness is just plain embarrassing. Nice try with the rape cliche, but it does you no good. We are not discussing rape.

I have a huge problem with schoolgirls sending obscene photographs of themselves anywhere. So ugly, so sad.

Me again. I believe it is ugly and sad because this type of acting so often indicates having been sexually molested. So very sad.

Or even more:
Absence of a strong father figure in the home.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Interesting also that there is a strain of hostility toward women running through a number of the posts that are trying to minimize the actions of the boys in this case.

This. Misogyny is clearly alive and well on DCUM.

Oh for Christ's sake.
Let's pretend, for the sake of discussion, that all the teens in question are boys. Some boys took naked pics of themselves, just for fun or to send with love to their boyfriends or girlfriends. And some other boys thought it would be clever to collect pics of naked boys from their school and post them on some website. They convinced boys to send them naked pics, or convinced a few of the boyfriends or girlfriends to betray their loved ones by forwarding the naked pics. Then someone found out about it, reported it, and the gig was up.
Now, do you give all the boys a pass with this behavior? Do you blame only some of the boys? Is there plenty of blame to go around but you blame some more than others?
Can you see how different people could have different opinions on this behavior and relative culpability without misogyny having anything to do with it?

No. The people who collect the pictures and invite others to view the pictures are the more culpable. They expose those in the pictures to ridicule and, by attaching names to the pictures, place the people in the pictures in danger from someone with bad intent who can find out where they live. Boy or girl, deliberately subjecting others to ridicule and danger is far more blameworthy.

It's clear where the greater culpability lies when you take boy v. girl out of the question, so the attacks on the girls throughout this thread do appear to be motivated by misogyny.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will flat out say it. I blame the boys more than the girls if the girls did not intend for the pictures to become public. While I would prefer that my daughter not send her boyfriend naked pictures, I see that as way more acceptable in the context of a loving relationship (or what she mistakenly thinks is a loving relationship -- weren't we all in love in high school) than breaching your girlfriend's trust and circulating or posting pictures for all to see.

Please teach your kids that when they post on the internet, they have no expectation of privacy.

What about when they send something in a private email? Still no expectation of privacy?

Are you serious? THERE IS NO PRIVACY ON THE INTERNET.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So all you moms see nothing wrong with the girls posting nude selfies on social media? I wouldn't be surprised to hear that the girls sent them directly to the Dropbox themselves. Without the girls' naked pics, the boys would have been playing Call of Duty.

I imagine you're the type of person who believes a woman who was raped "asked for it" by wearing a skirt.

I am the type of mom who is sick of girls saying they were raped when it was consensual, but get their feelings hurt because it was sex not love.

As a woman who was raped, I find your comment misinformed, offensive and downright dangerous to the future of our girls.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Interesting also that there is a strain of hostility toward women running through a number of the posts that are trying to minimize the actions of the boys in this case.

This. Misogyny is clearly alive and well on DCUM.

Oh for Christ's sake.

Let's pretend, for the sake of discussion, that all the teens in question are boys. Some boys took naked pics of themselves, just for fun or to send with love to their boyfriends or girlfriends. And some other boys thought it would be clever to collect pics of naked boys from their school and post them on some website. They convinced boys to send them naked pics, or convinced a few of the boyfriends or girlfriends to betray their loved ones by forwarding the naked pics. Then someone found out about it, reported it, and the gig was up.

Now, do you give all the boys a pass with this behavior? Do you blame only some of the boys? Is there plenty of blame to go around but you blame some more than others?

Can you see how different people could have different opinions on this behavior and relative culpability without misogyny having anything to do with it?

Anonymous wrote:So all you moms see nothing wrong with the girls posting nude selfies on social media? I wouldn't be surprised to hear that the girls sent them directly to the Dropbox themselves. Without the girls' naked pics, the boys would have been playing Call of Duty.

Another misogynistic attempt to blame the girls for leading the poor, innocent boys astray. One can't help but wonder if this is the general atmosphere at the high school involved in this case or just the attitude of a few individuals?

If you want the girls to take responsibility for their possible actions you need to accept that the actions of the boys were far more blame-worthy. It took time and effort to put this site together. The difference in the level of culpability has been noted numerous times. It does a child no favors to make excuses and blame others for their actions.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So all you moms see nothing wrong with the girls posting nude selfies on social media? I wouldn't be surprised to hear that the girls sent them directly to the Dropbox themselves. Without the girls' naked pics, the boys would have been playing Call of Duty.

I imagine you're the type of person who believes a woman who was raped "asked for it" by wearing a skirt.

Not the PP, but the trashiness is just plain embarrassing. Nice try with the rape cliche, but it does you no good. We are not discussing rape.

I have a huge problem with schoolgirls sending obscene photographs of themselves anywhere. So ugly, so sad.

Me again. I believe it is ugly and sad because this type of acting so often indicates having been sexually molested. So very sad.

It's more like the teens have consensual sex and then one of them tells other people. There's no rape analogy at all. It's offensive to rape victims to even suggest a similarity.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So all you moms see nothing wrong with the girls posting nude selfies on social media? I wouldn't be surprised to hear that the girls sent them directly to the Dropbox themselves. Without the girls' naked pics, the boys would have been playing Call of Duty.

I imagine you're the type of person who believes a woman who was raped "asked for it" by wearing a skirt.

I am the type of mom who is sick of girls saying they were raped when it was consensual, but get their feelings hurt because it was sex not love.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So all you moms see nothing wrong with the girls posting nude selfies on social media? I wouldn't be surprised to hear that the girls sent them directly to the Dropbox themselves. Without the girls' naked pics, the boys would have been playing Call of Duty.

I imagine you're the type of person who believes a woman who was raped "asked for it" by wearing a skirt.

Not the PP, but the trashiness is just plain embarrassing. Nice try with the rape cliche, but it does you no good. We are not discussing rape.

I have a huge problem with schoolgirls sending obscene photographs of themselves anywhere. So ugly, so sad.