Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:45 yo man here — I don’t know why I would ever want to remarry. I’m financially secure and love the adult Disneyland that exists for guys my age especially with OLD. It’s like I’m in my 20s again. I don’t need the baggage and loss of my independence that comes with marriage. And it seems as soon as young women (late 20s and early 30s) see you’re financially secure, have a head on your shoulders, and willing to spoil them a little, they are very giving. I plan to enjoy this for the foreseeable future.

Until you meet someone in her late twenties or early thirties who is self-assured, beautiful, and smart, and she wants to get married and have kids, and you know you're already out of your depth. This happened to a friend/colleague who had sworn off remarriage. However, he was still handsome, fit, high energy, high net-worth, and at the peak of his career, so he attracted some impressive women, and eventually one that he felt was too good to let go, and they had more kids. It is unclear whether he's happy, but he does project a happy family life, and his wife is hot. I think there are a lot of versions of this story out there: men in their late forties who have the resources end up getting sucked in because they're desirable and can pull high-quality women who have high standards and want marriage. Women in our late forties don't want to be responsible for raising children anymore. We've had enough, and we screen out men who are looking for a sugar mamma and a stepmom to take over their parenting responsibilities for us.

Guy here…I mostly fit that profile but looks are subjective so I’ll leave that judgement to the women I date. But if I ever thought about getting married again to a woman like you describe above….I would make sure to have an airtight pre-nup that was lawyer proof.

Lmao.

Lawyer here.

Are there still men out there who think a “lawyer proof” prenup exists?

I specialize in highly contentious divorces between high net worth individuals and I exclusively represent wives because my mom was a housewife who got screwed and I’m playing out my own revenge narrative against my hated father by divorce-raping husbands up and down the northeast. (I’ve been to therapy and I’m now in touch with my actual motives for doing this work.)

Here’s what I do with “lawyer proof” prenups:

First, I challenge the circumstances under which the prenup was signed. Fraud, duress, you name it. Regardless of the merits of the allegations, I can drag out proceedings for anywhere from six months to 2 years, depending on the court’s docket and how amenable the judge is to fishing expeditions.

Second, I challenge the interpretation of various clauses in the prenup. You see, it’s not what YOU intended in drafting that matters. It’s what can be reasonably be inferred from the actual language that’s relevant…and that gives me a lot of room to drag things out another several months to a few years even.

Third, any woman you’ve so much as smiled at during your marriage is a potential mistress. Get ready for me to drag them all in with salacious allegations that will definitely make it to all of your business partners and friends through no doing of mine.

Fourth, anyone you’ve given any expensive gifts is a potential co-conspirator in a fraudulent scheme the object of which is to depress the value of your holdings and thereby cheat my client.

We haven’t even gotten to scope of whatever is left of the prenup and various ways of narrowing that scope so that the enforceable provisions cover a lot less than you intended.

While all this is going on, your lawyers fees, medical bills from the stress I’m deliberately causing you, and lost wages from all the hearings I’m going to drag you to are mounting.

The smart men cut my clients a nice check to make me go away. The stupid ones end up paying that money to their team of lawyers and experts. Regardless, I promise you will not get to keep or enjoy very much of the money you thought you were protecting with the one-sided, greedy prenup.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:45 yo man here — I don’t know why I would ever want to remarry. I’m financially secure and love the adult Disneyland that exists for guys my age especially with OLD. It’s like I’m in my 20s again. I don’t need the baggage and loss of my independence that comes with marriage. And it seems as soon as young women (late 20s and early 30s) see you’re financially secure, have a head on your shoulders, and willing to spoil them a little, they are very giving. I plan to enjoy this for the foreseeable future.

Until you meet someone in her late twenties or early thirties who is self-assured, beautiful, and smart, and she wants to get married and have kids, and you know you're already out of your depth. This happened to a friend/colleague who had sworn off remarriage. However, he was still handsome, fit, high energy, high net-worth, and at the peak of his career, so he attracted some impressive women, and eventually one that he felt was too good to let go, and they had more kids. It is unclear whether he's happy, but he does project a happy family life, and his wife is hot. I think there are a lot of versions of this story out there: men in their late forties who have the resources end up getting sucked in because they're desirable and can pull high-quality women who have high standards and want marriage. Women in our late forties don't want to be responsible for raising children anymore. We've had enough, and we screen out men who are looking for a sugar mamma and a stepmom to take over their parenting responsibilities for us.

Guy here…I mostly fit that profile but looks are subjective so I’ll leave that judgement to the women I date. But if I ever thought about getting married again to a woman like you describe above….I would make sure to have an airtight pre-nup that was lawyer proof.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:45 yo man here — I don’t know why I would ever want to remarry. I’m financially secure and love the adult Disneyland that exists for guys my age especially with OLD. It’s like I’m in my 20s again. I don’t need the baggage and loss of my independence that comes with marriage. And it seems as soon as young women (late 20s and early 30s) see you’re financially secure, have a head on your shoulders, and willing to spoil them a little, they are very giving. I plan to enjoy this for the foreseeable future.

That’s great. Are you honest with them that you will never commit to them?

See, the difference here, is women are honest and upfront about their intentions. If they are not looking to remarry they say so upfront.

You and many of your counterparts see women as an ever changing cast of Disney characters with you as the puppet master. Leading young women on because your not capable of being a real man.

PP here. It’s OLD….what the heck else are these women expecting? It’s in my OLD profile that I’m not looking for a long term relationship so I’m very transparent upfront. I’m surprised by the number of 30+ year olds who just want to have some fun without any big strings attached. I do spoil them a little with some great travel and so I think they are fine with the arrangement. Besides they are all financially independent from what ai can tell. I’ve done the marriage thing and have adult kids. I’m done with that.

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Anonymous wrote:I have spent thirty years taking care of everyone's needs except my own. I have zero interest in taking on more.

Say it again sister! Done!

Yes! I want to be able to do whatever the heck I want.

This! The only people I am willing to help and support are my grandchildren one day, maybe, if I have any. And my pet. I’ve done enough for others for a lifetime and I’m not yet 50.

You just don't have mental space and time for a relationship, and therefore don't want to marry

that’s what everyone is trying to tell you. men take up too much mental space and time. I’ve seen it - it ain’t pretty to see a 70-something woman have to cater to and placate her obnoxious 2nd husband when she could just be basking with her grandkids and well-earned rest.

Men need a life manager and caretaker, especially as they age. Even obnoxiously wealthy men will do whatever it takes to tie themselves to a long-term relationship as they age.

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Anonymous wrote:I can't see any benefits to remarriage for me at this life stage. Older people who seem most keen on remarriage are typically religious, looking for financial gain, or wealthy men who have fallen for a younger woman and want to have a family together. None of those things apply. My life is full, and while dating and companionship are appealing, marriage is not. I can't conceive of changing my mind on this point.

Don't project your mean spirited thinking at others. I'm a wealthy woman, but I do want to remarry in my 40s or 50s. Reasons are not to seek financial gain, but to build a life, plan retirement, medical care, travel together with a partner. Support each other in bad and good. I still believe that is possible. Of course you can do some of that with a boyfriend, but not being married makes long term planning harder. And I also have a good lawyer who can draft a prenup, and wouldn't marry until after at least 3 years of co-habilitation. I believe marriage is a great tool to raise kids but can also serve as a good middle age planning for the mutual well-being, if the partner is right.

I'm the PP. I admit life has made me cynical about second marriages, but not mean-spirited. Your post suggests a fourth category - a hopeless romantic. Reading and life suggests if either person has children, second marriages are not good for mutual well-being, as they bring conflicting loyalties and priorities.

I'm not a hopeless romantic. Marriage is a totally practical institute, and I had a long and rather successful first marriage. Yes, we both made mistakes but I selected my first husband wisely: we were both driven, professional and hard working. We both made tons of money during marriage, joined resources in child raising and building up wealth. Neither of us lost wealth after divorce: each had it multiplied many times over what our individual NW was prior to marriage. I dont have "multiple kids" still at home. I'm an empty nester with one child. I don't date men with more than one child either, and their child should be over 13 years of age. Don't date those who wouldn't want to co-habilite or remarry in a long term perspective.
You don't don't want a relationship, period. Others want it.

If you ended up divorced, you absolutely did not select wisely. Your post is delusional.

Each of us entered marriage with massive student loans and zero NW. We exited it with a grown up successful child, and several businesses. I selected wisely, it's just you cannot control other people feelings, past traumas, the changes they go through in middle age. You cannot buy an insurance policy on marriage, but you can marry well and happily many times over.

um ok, good luck to you!

did you cheat on your spouse? you arw weirdly narcissistic about this given your failed marriage.

No, he cheated on me (but still single, not married and dating in his late 50s, not married his AP). I'm just proud of myself, my child, my experiences in life and I grateful for all I experienced, good or bad. It all wasn't for nothing.

and yet somehow you’re so insecure that you cannot stand a partner having 2 kids or a hobby

I explained above - people with multiple kids just don't have time, neither for hobbies nor for relationships.

that’s an incredibly bizarre view

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Anonymous wrote:Something wrong with all you single people. You won’t remarry because you aren’t the marrying type in the first place and are all bitter.

Yea, a great constellation of opportunistic users on this thread with zero morals or attachments

Maybe if men want women to have “morals and attachments” and marry them, they should step up and contribute more to relationships. The stark difference between male and female interest in dating & remarriage indicates men are doing something pretty wrong collectively. Once we no longer need men to provide children or money, the equation shifts. There’s nothing immoral about it.

Maybe you’re the problem with playing victim.

ha you wish. it really bothers you that older women don’t want to get married.

“I don’t want to get married again I’m tired of taking care of useless manbabies” is pure cope from women who are old and unattractive and thus men aren’t interested in marrying them.

It's the opposite. Women who are the most attractive and independently wealthy are the least likely to want remarriage. And so what? Plenty of women want marriage or remarriage, so date them if that's your goal. No need to get testy on here.

True. And the only woman I know who did remarry ended up with a real albatross. I see literally zero role models for remarriage in my life, but many very content older single women.

Maybe you don't travel enough? I see happy elderly couples on their second or third marriages happily traveling together all over the world all the time on my international vacations. They don't think their kids won't get enough; each of them is self-sufficient and has own pensions, assets etc but it didn't prevent them from committing and marriage. Yes, in most cases one of the spouses doesn't have kids and makes the second spouse a "beloved baby" they take care of, or each of them only has one child. Never saw happily married elderly couples (e.g. over 70 yo) in blended families situation.

an adult “beloved baby”?? what??

Yeah, if that’s PPs model of a healthy second marriage, I’ll stay single, thanks. That’s outright creepy. 🤢🤢

I wouldn't mind to be someone's "spoilt baby" in my 60s LOL.

You just have no sense of humor

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Anonymous wrote:Something wrong with all you single people. You won’t remarry because you aren’t the marrying type in the first place and are all bitter.

Yea, a great constellation of opportunistic users on this thread with zero morals or attachments

Maybe if men want women to have “morals and attachments” and marry them, they should step up and contribute more to relationships. The stark difference between male and female interest in dating & remarriage indicates men are doing something pretty wrong collectively. Once we no longer need men to provide children or money, the equation shifts. There’s nothing immoral about it.

Maybe you’re the problem with playing victim.

ha you wish. it really bothers you that older women don’t want to get married.

“I don’t want to get married again I’m tired of taking care of useless manbabies” is pure cope from women who are old and unattractive and thus men aren’t interested in marrying them.

It's the opposite. Women who are the most attractive and independently wealthy are the least likely to want remarriage. And so what? Plenty of women want marriage or remarriage, so date them if that's your goal. No need to get testy on here.

True. And the only woman I know who did remarry ended up with a real albatross. I see literally zero role models for remarriage in my life, but many very content older single women.

Maybe you don't travel enough? I see happy elderly couples on their second or third marriages happily traveling together all over the world all the time on my international vacations. They don't think their kids won't get enough; each of them is self-sufficient and has own pensions, assets etc but it didn't prevent them from committing and marriage. Yes, in most cases one of the spouses doesn't have kids and makes the second spouse a "beloved baby" they take care of, or each of them only has one child. Never saw happily married elderly couples (e.g. over 70 yo) in blended families situation.

an adult “beloved baby”?? what??

Yeah, if that’s PPs model of a healthy second marriage, I’ll stay single, thanks. That’s outright creepy. 🤢🤢

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Anonymous wrote:I can't see any benefits to remarriage for me at this life stage. Older people who seem most keen on remarriage are typically religious, looking for financial gain, or wealthy men who have fallen for a younger woman and want to have a family together. None of those things apply. My life is full, and while dating and companionship are appealing, marriage is not. I can't conceive of changing my mind on this point.

Don't project your mean spirited thinking at others. I'm a wealthy woman, but I do want to remarry in my 40s or 50s. Reasons are not to seek financial gain, but to build a life, plan retirement, medical care, travel together with a partner. Support each other in bad and good. I still believe that is possible. Of course you can do some of that with a boyfriend, but not being married makes long term planning harder. And I also have a good lawyer who can draft a prenup, and wouldn't marry until after at least 3 years of co-habilitation. I believe marriage is a great tool to raise kids but can also serve as a good middle age planning for the mutual well-being, if the partner is right.

I'm the PP. I admit life has made me cynical about second marriages, but not mean-spirited. Your post suggests a fourth category - a hopeless romantic. Reading and life suggests if either person has children, second marriages are not good for mutual well-being, as they bring conflicting loyalties and priorities.

I'm not a hopeless romantic. Marriage is a totally practical institute, and I had a long and rather successful first marriage. Yes, we both made mistakes but I selected my first husband wisely: we were both driven, professional and hard working. We both made tons of money during marriage, joined resources in child raising and building up wealth. Neither of us lost wealth after divorce: each had it multiplied many times over what our individual NW was prior to marriage. I dont have "multiple kids" still at home. I'm an empty nester with one child. I don't date men with more than one child either, and their child should be over 13 years of age. Don't date those who wouldn't want to co-habilite or remarry in a long term perspective.
You don't don't want a relationship, period. Others want it.

If you ended up divorced, you absolutely did not select wisely. Your post is delusional.

Each of us entered marriage with massive student loans and zero NW. We exited it with a grown up successful child, and several businesses. I selected wisely, it's just you cannot control other people feelings, past traumas, the changes they go through in middle age. You cannot buy an insurance policy on marriage, but you can marry well and happily many times over.

um ok, good luck to you!

did you cheat on your spouse? you arw weirdly narcissistic about this given your failed marriage.

No, he cheated on me (but still single, not married and dating in his late 50s, not married his AP). I'm just proud of myself, my child, my experiences in life and I grateful for all I experienced, good or bad. It all wasn't for nothing.

and yet somehow you’re so insecure that you cannot stand a partner having 2 kids or a hobby

I explained above - people with multiple kids just don't have time, neither for hobbies nor for relationships.

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I have spent thirty years taking care of everyone's needs except my own. I have zero interest in taking on more.

Say it again sister! Done!

Yes! I want to be able to do whatever the heck I want.

This! The only people I am willing to help and support are my grandchildren one day, maybe, if I have any. And my pet. I’ve done enough for others for a lifetime and I’m not yet 50.

You just don't have mental space and time for a relationship, and therefore don't want to marry

that’s what everyone is trying to tell you. men take up too much mental space and time. I’ve seen it - it ain’t pretty to see a 70-something woman have to cater to and placate her obnoxious 2nd husband when she could just be basking with her grandkids and well-earned rest.

Ah, I wouldn't marry or stay married long to someone obnoxious.

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Anonymous wrote:I can't see any benefits to remarriage for me at this life stage. Older people who seem most keen on remarriage are typically religious, looking for financial gain, or wealthy men who have fallen for a younger woman and want to have a family together. None of those things apply. My life is full, and while dating and companionship are appealing, marriage is not. I can't conceive of changing my mind on this point.

Don't project your mean spirited thinking at others. I'm a wealthy woman, but I do want to remarry in my 40s or 50s. Reasons are not to seek financial gain, but to build a life, plan retirement, medical care, travel together with a partner. Support each other in bad and good. I still believe that is possible. Of course you can do some of that with a boyfriend, but not being married makes long term planning harder. And I also have a good lawyer who can draft a prenup, and wouldn't marry until after at least 3 years of co-habilitation. I believe marriage is a great tool to raise kids but can also serve as a good middle age planning for the mutual well-being, if the partner is right.

I'm the PP. I admit life has made me cynical about second marriages, but not mean-spirited. Your post suggests a fourth category - a hopeless romantic. Reading and life suggests if either person has children, second marriages are not good for mutual well-being, as they bring conflicting loyalties and priorities.

I'm not a hopeless romantic. Marriage is a totally practical institute, and I had a long and rather successful first marriage. Yes, we both made mistakes but I selected my first husband wisely: we were both driven, professional and hard working. We both made tons of money during marriage, joined resources in child raising and building up wealth. Neither of us lost wealth after divorce: each had it multiplied many times over what our individual NW was prior to marriage. I dont have "multiple kids" still at home. I'm an empty nester with one child. I don't date men with more than one child either, and their child should be over 13 years of age. Don't date those who wouldn't want to co-habilite or remarry in a long term perspective.
You don't don't want a relationship, period. Others want it.

If you ended up divorced, you absolutely did not select wisely. Your post is delusional.

Each of us entered marriage with massive student loans and zero NW. We exited it with a grown up successful child, and several businesses. I selected wisely, it's just you cannot control other people feelings, past traumas, the changes they go through in middle age. You cannot buy an insurance policy on marriage, but you can marry well and happily many times over.

um ok, good luck to you!

did you cheat on your spouse? you arw weirdly narcissistic about this given your failed marriage.

No, he cheated on me (but still single, not married and dating in his late 50s, not married his AP). I'm just proud of myself, my child, my experiences in life and I grateful for all I experienced, good or bad. It all wasn't for nothing.

and yet somehow you’re so insecure that you cannot stand a partner having 2 kids or a hobby

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Anonymous wrote:I can't see any benefits to remarriage for me at this life stage. Older people who seem most keen on remarriage are typically religious, looking for financial gain, or wealthy men who have fallen for a younger woman and want to have a family together. None of those things apply. My life is full, and while dating and companionship are appealing, marriage is not. I can't conceive of changing my mind on this point.

Don't project your mean spirited thinking at others. I'm a wealthy woman, but I do want to remarry in my 40s or 50s. Reasons are not to seek financial gain, but to build a life, plan retirement, medical care, travel together with a partner. Support each other in bad and good. I still believe that is possible. Of course you can do some of that with a boyfriend, but not being married makes long term planning harder. And I also have a good lawyer who can draft a prenup, and wouldn't marry until after at least 3 years of co-habilitation. I believe marriage is a great tool to raise kids but can also serve as a good middle age planning for the mutual well-being, if the partner is right.

I'm the PP. I admit life has made me cynical about second marriages, but not mean-spirited. Your post suggests a fourth category - a hopeless romantic. Reading and life suggests if either person has children, second marriages are not good for mutual well-being, as they bring conflicting loyalties and priorities.

I'm not a hopeless romantic. Marriage is a totally practical institute, and I had a long and rather successful first marriage. Yes, we both made mistakes but I selected my first husband wisely: we were both driven, professional and hard working. We both made tons of money during marriage, joined resources in child raising and building up wealth. Neither of us lost wealth after divorce: each had it multiplied many times over what our individual NW was prior to marriage. I dont have "multiple kids" still at home. I'm an empty nester with one child. I don't date men with more than one child either, and their child should be over 13 years of age. Don't date those who wouldn't want to co-habilite or remarry in a long term perspective.
You don't don't want a relationship, period. Others want it.

Not wanting to remarry is not the same as not wanting relationships.

RelationshipS in plural is the general common denominator for the PP commenters above, men and women. They are totally discouraged in committing and either just want switch partners every 2-3 years. This has nothing to do with building a life with someone, or joint future. They just want zero entanglements and an easy exit. Maybe for some it's tempting but for me to be happy I need to be the center of his universe and other way around.
And I have zero desire to date in my mid 50s looking for a new BF every 3 years. Seems too complicated and takes the lifetime from other important goals and people in my life, all that OLD dating.

I don't date men with multiple children (even college age), as I could see from these photos that kids are the center of their universe and I will always be secondary. I'm mid 40s, but I meet a lot of single never married slightly younger men, or men with one child who still want to commit. Of course if a guy has that many kids the women's role in his life would be limited to FWB (e.g. meeting on demand whenever he's available for a nice date followed by sex, maybe travel sometimes).

I want to have make a home with someone who I love in my space at some point (and no, he wouldn't need to buy it for me, I'm totally fine to equally contribute). I probably wouldn't marry outright, but would own a home with long term partner as a first step, and to see if we are able to coexist and enjoy it.

Man, the bolded makes be deeply pity those poor singleton kids of the men you date. What a nightmare!

Why? My parents are still married, and my adult siblings and I are not the center of their universe. My parents are in the more selfish phase of their retirement, as they are still healthy enough to enjoy sports and heavy traveling. We see them for holidays, plus maybe an additional week a year, and they check in on grandkids regularly, but we're not the center of their universe. I'm happy they're happy and living their lives while they can.

Finally a person with healthy attitude. These crazy dads whose only vacation is with his daughters who are themselves in their late 20s is just sick. This tells me he wasn't able to rebuild his life, is bitter after divorce and his daughters are not able to build healthy relationships either. My 17yo is more independent than that and would hate me even doing college visits with them, leaving alone going for a multi-weeks vacation overseas. They have own life.

lol! thanks for making the point. Men cannot hack it on their own and need a woman. meanwhile the older single women are vacationing with their sisters, BFFs or alone and having a great time.

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Anonymous wrote:Something wrong with all you single people. You won’t remarry because you aren’t the marrying type in the first place and are all bitter.

Yea, a great constellation of opportunistic users on this thread with zero morals or attachments

Maybe if men want women to have “morals and attachments” and marry them, they should step up and contribute more to relationships. The stark difference between male and female interest in dating & remarriage indicates men are doing something pretty wrong collectively. Once we no longer need men to provide children or money, the equation shifts. There’s nothing immoral about it.

Maybe you’re the problem with playing victim.

ha you wish. it really bothers you that older women don’t want to get married.

“I don’t want to get married again I’m tired of taking care of useless manbabies” is pure cope from women who are old and unattractive and thus men aren’t interested in marrying them.

It's the opposite. Women who are the most attractive and independently wealthy are the least likely to want remarriage. And so what? Plenty of women want marriage or remarriage, so date them if that's your goal. No need to get testy on here.

True. And the only woman I know who did remarry ended up with a real albatross. I see literally zero role models for remarriage in my life, but many very content older single women.

Maybe you don't travel enough? I see happy elderly couples on their second or third marriages happily traveling together all over the world all the time on my international vacations. They don't think their kids won't get enough; each of them is self-sufficient and has own pensions, assets etc but it didn't prevent them from committing and marriage. Yes, in most cases one of the spouses doesn't have kids and makes the second spouse a "beloved baby" they take care of, or each of them only has one child. Never saw happily married elderly couples (e.g. over 70 yo) in blended families situation.

an adult “beloved baby”?? what??

That's a joke. Just a common theme I observe in these happier middle age marriages: one spouse would be very caring about the other. Doesn't matter if it's M or F they just have different expressions in "spoiling" their partner

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Anonymous wrote:I have spent thirty years taking care of everyone's needs except my own. I have zero interest in taking on more.

Say it again sister! Done!

Yes! I want to be able to do whatever the heck I want.

This! The only people I am willing to help and support are my grandchildren one day, maybe, if I have any. And my pet. I’ve done enough for others for a lifetime and I’m not yet 50.

You just don't have mental space and time for a relationship, and therefore don't want to marry

that’s what everyone is trying to tell you. men take up too much mental space and time. I’ve seen it - it ain’t pretty to see a 70-something woman have to cater to and placate her obnoxious 2nd husband when she could just be basking with her grandkids and well-earned rest.

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Anonymous wrote:I can't see any benefits to remarriage for me at this life stage. Older people who seem most keen on remarriage are typically religious, looking for financial gain, or wealthy men who have fallen for a younger woman and want to have a family together. None of those things apply. My life is full, and while dating and companionship are appealing, marriage is not. I can't conceive of changing my mind on this point.

Don't project your mean spirited thinking at others. I'm a wealthy woman, but I do want to remarry in my 40s or 50s. Reasons are not to seek financial gain, but to build a life, plan retirement, medical care, travel together with a partner. Support each other in bad and good. I still believe that is possible. Of course you can do some of that with a boyfriend, but not being married makes long term planning harder. And I also have a good lawyer who can draft a prenup, and wouldn't marry until after at least 3 years of co-habilitation. I believe marriage is a great tool to raise kids but can also serve as a good middle age planning for the mutual well-being, if the partner is right.

I'm the PP. I admit life has made me cynical about second marriages, but not mean-spirited. Your post suggests a fourth category - a hopeless romantic. Reading and life suggests if either person has children, second marriages are not good for mutual well-being, as they bring conflicting loyalties and priorities.

I'm not a hopeless romantic. Marriage is a totally practical institute, and I had a long and rather successful first marriage. Yes, we both made mistakes but I selected my first husband wisely: we were both driven, professional and hard working. We both made tons of money during marriage, joined resources in child raising and building up wealth. Neither of us lost wealth after divorce: each had it multiplied many times over what our individual NW was prior to marriage. I dont have "multiple kids" still at home. I'm an empty nester with one child. I don't date men with more than one child either, and their child should be over 13 years of age. Don't date those who wouldn't want to co-habilite or remarry in a long term perspective.
You don't don't want a relationship, period. Others want it.

If you ended up divorced, you absolutely did not select wisely. Your post is delusional.

Each of us entered marriage with massive student loans and zero NW. We exited it with a grown up successful child, and several businesses. I selected wisely, it's just you cannot control other people feelings, past traumas, the changes they go through in middle age. You cannot buy an insurance policy on marriage, but you can marry well and happily many times over.

um ok, good luck to you!

did you cheat on your spouse? you arw weirdly narcissistic about this given your failed marriage.

No, he cheated on me (but still single, not married and dating in his late 50s, not married his AP). I'm just proud of myself, my child, my experiences in life and I grateful for all I experienced, good or bad. It all wasn't for nothing.

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Anonymous wrote:Something wrong with all you single people. You won’t remarry because you aren’t the marrying type in the first place and are all bitter.

Yea, a great constellation of opportunistic users on this thread with zero morals or attachments

Maybe if men want women to have “morals and attachments” and marry them, they should step up and contribute more to relationships. The stark difference between male and female interest in dating & remarriage indicates men are doing something pretty wrong collectively. Once we no longer need men to provide children or money, the equation shifts. There’s nothing immoral about it.

Maybe you’re the problem with playing victim.

ha you wish. it really bothers you that older women don’t want to get married.

“I don’t want to get married again I’m tired of taking care of useless manbabies” is pure cope from women who are old and unattractive and thus men aren’t interested in marrying them.

It's the opposite. Women who are the most attractive and independently wealthy are the least likely to want remarriage. And so what? Plenty of women want marriage or remarriage, so date them if that's your goal. No need to get testy on here.

True. And the only woman I know who did remarry ended up with a real albatross. I see literally zero role models for remarriage in my life, but many very content older single women.

Maybe you don't travel enough? I see happy elderly couples on their second or third marriages happily traveling together all over the world all the time on my international vacations. They don't think their kids won't get enough; each of them is self-sufficient and has own pensions, assets etc but it didn't prevent them from committing and marriage. Yes, in most cases one of the spouses doesn't have kids and makes the second spouse a "beloved baby" they take care of, or each of them only has one child. Never saw happily married elderly couples (e.g. over 70 yo) in blended families situation.

an adult “beloved baby”?? what??