Anonymous wrote:I wonder how much of people's reactions is due to a different response to the use of "screwed"? My generation (thank-you note writing, just missed boomerdom) tends to use it as a synonym for "out of luck in a notable but not life-ruining way."
Back in the day, Hillary Clinton used it to describe the status of some people who missed their entry time on a White House holiday party, and she used it in the sense of "This is really unfortunate and I wish it could be fixed," but not as "THIS IS THE END OF THEIR RELATIONSHIP WITH OUR ADMINISTRATION," which is how a lot of you seem to be taking it. I guess it's become harsher over time?
Anonymous wrote:My nephew's wedding was a four-day affair with a number of printed pieces featuring original artwork/logo -save the date, invitation, welcome note, calendar of events, etc. I am absolutely sure whatever printer created all those cards, invitations, etc. suggested printing thank you notes, as well. And yet we never received one.
I'm going to choose to believe they wrote a heartfelt thank you and it's sitting in someone's underwear drawer.
Anonymous wrote:My cousin and his wife did not send a thank you note after I paid thousands to fly my family to the wedding and pay for a rental car and lodging, and we gave a generous check.
You know how it changed my relationship with them? Not at all. They had a lovely wedding, during which time they both verbally thanked me and my family for being there. They danced with us. They provided a great meal and the opportunity to reunite with many family members. It was the last time I ever saw my granddad—it was one of the few times he ever got to hold my baby.
Why didn’t I get into a self-righteous snit, even thought I was a little hurt that they didn’t acknowledge the check? Because I’m not a perfect person. I sometimes fall short of perfect etiquette standards. Because as a human who makes mistakes, I cannot come down on people for making mistakes without being a massive hypocrite.
Anonymous wrote:I wonder how much of people's reactions is due to a different response to the use of "screwed"? My generation (thank-you note writing, just missed boomerdom) tends to use it as a synonym for "out of luck in a notable but not life-ruining way."
Back in the day, Hillary Clinton used it to describe the status of some people who missed their entry time on a White House holiday party, and she used it in the sense of "This is really unfortunate and I wish it could be fixed," but not as "THIS IS THE END OF THEIR RELATIONSHIP WITH OUR ADMINISTRATION," which is how a lot of you seem to be taking it. I guess it's become harsher over time?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:All these aunties, moms, older SILs and MILs on DCUM freaking out about their loss of significance and power lately. It really is such a sad sight to behold.
Mic drop.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I have a niece and nephew who have literally never said thanks, in any way shape or form- text nessage, email, call, etc., for holiday or birthday. I always sent- since they were born. Finally last year, I decided to stop. They also don't respond to any texts asking " Hi, How are you?" Very immature.
Ages 28 and 26.
Sounds like you and the OP need better hobbies. Heck, I would your job alone would be enough to keep you from fixating on this.
Of course, if you don’t have a real job then all of this makes more sense…
Anonymous wrote:I have a niece and nephew who have literally never said thanks, in any way shape or form- text nessage, email, call, etc., for holiday or birthday. I always sent- since they were born. Finally last year, I decided to stop. They also don't respond to any texts asking " Hi, How are you?" Very immature.
Ages 28 and 26.
Anonymous wrote:OP, are you genuinely close with them and not trying to buy love? I ask because my mother gets herself into a rage over stuff like this and yes, saying stuff like "my niece just screwed herself" sounds like bitter rage. My mom never gives a gift without strings and when she gets a thank you note, it isn't enough. She wasn't praised enough or it wasn't personal enough or long enough. Then she brings up her generosity whenever she expects things and tries to guilt trip. So while she always gives the largest amount of money she feel she is purchasing all sorts of rights. The younger generation now does not engage at all-not even thank you notes. Parents still insist she be invited to gatherings, but everyone seems to avoid her.
Anonymous wrote:First The check wasn’t “cashed” it probably was deposited. And Two days after the wedding - she was on her honeymoon!?I bet she had someone deposit ALL of them at once, so sadly, she may not even know that you gave it.
I made my kids send thank you notes when they were really young. As they get older, they verbally told people thank you and sent text. I’m sure if you sent my 20yo son something today he would not say thank you or think send a thank you note, especially if he did not have your phone number and he wouldn’t even know where to buy a thank you card.
So, maybe you are better off not giving your niece anything else. Just know that if it was deposited, it was likely spent. It probably came in handy. And if it helps you not to give her anything else, then do what gives your heart peace. But if she didn’t even realize you gave her the first gift, she probably isn’t expecting anything (else) from you anyway.