Anonymous
Post 01/05/2025 07:12     Subject: Should a sympathy card include money? If so how much?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I am not sure from what purpose you'd be sending the money. I have never heard of including money in a sympathy card.
Does she need the money for funeral expenses?

If not send flowers or fruit to your friend when she gets back.

I know lots of people who send money -- funerals and death expensives can be very costly.


Not in the sympathy cards though / usually to go fund me accounts set up for this purpose.


Many who don’t have money to cover the cost of a funeral are too proud or private to set up a gofund-me account.
Anonymous
Post 01/05/2025 07:09     Subject: Should a sympathy card include money? If so how much?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My friend's father passed away on Christmas Day. Is money okay for the sympathy card? If so, how much money should I include in the card? I would like to put the card in the mail tomorrow. I will not be able to go to the funeral. I cannot send a basket or flowers because she lives in a different state from parents and I do not know their address. I just thought I would mail the card and it will be waiting for her when she returned home.


When I lost my mother a few friends brought or sent dinner or food so I didn’t have to think about trying to feed my family. It’s interesting that these friends are Jewish. I will never forget this kindness. I don’t recall who sent flowers although many did. I did not need money. Maybe someone else does. Does your friend need money? What’s the intention behind sending it?


You can also ask the name and location of the funeral home if you want to send flowers. A different state doesn’t matter. Call a florist in that state.
Anonymous
Post 01/05/2025 07:07     Subject: Should a sympathy card include money? If so how much?
Anonymous wrote:My friend's father passed away on Christmas Day. Is money okay for the sympathy card? If so, how much money should I include in the card? I would like to put the card in the mail tomorrow. I will not be able to go to the funeral. I cannot send a basket or flowers because she lives in a different state from parents and I do not know their address. I just thought I would mail the card and it will be waiting for her when she returned home.


When I lost my mother a few friends brought or sent dinner or food so I didn’t have to think about trying to feed my family. It’s interesting that these friends are Jewish. I will never forget this kindness. I don’t recall who sent flowers although many did. I did not need money. Maybe someone else does. Does your friend need money? What’s the intention behind sending it?
Anonymous
Post 01/05/2025 06:16     Subject: Should a sympathy card include money? If so how much?
Anonymous wrote:$100 per year that you know them. Double that if it’s family or close friends with children.


This is ridiculous. For those of us who have friends of 30 years or more we may not have 3k lying around plus 6k each for their 3 kids bringing donations up to >20 k.

Go fund me accounts set up for the purposes of helping to defray funeral and burial costs usually welcome whatever amount people can afford and feel comfortable with.
Anonymous
Post 01/05/2025 06:11     Subject: Should a sympathy card include money? If so how much?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I am not sure from what purpose you'd be sending the money. I have never heard of including money in a sympathy card.
Does she need the money for funeral expenses?

If not send flowers or fruit to your friend when she gets back.

I know lots of people who send money -- funerals and death expensives can be very costly.


Not in the sympathy cards though / usually to go fund me accounts set up for this purpose.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 22:36     Subject: Should a sympathy card include money? If so how much?
$100 per year that you know them. Double that if it’s family or close friends with children.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 22:32     Subject: Should a sympathy card include money? If so how much?
Anonymous wrote:My friend's father passed away on Christmas Day. Is money okay for the sympathy card? If so, how much money should I include in the card? I would like to put the card in the mail tomorrow. I will not be able to go to the funeral. I cannot send a basket or flowers because she lives in a different state from parents and I do not know their address. I just thought I would mail the card and it will be waiting for her when she returned home.


Send a flower arrangement to her after funeral and she is home. Only send money if the obituary asks for donations to defray funeral expenses and then do so anonymously so as not to embarrass the family
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 17:24     Subject: Re:Should a sympathy card include money? If so how much?
NO
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 16:51     Subject: Re:Should a sympathy card include money? If so how much?
Personally I would not send money $$ in a sympathy card because I do not feel it is necessary.

Instead what you can do is write a lovely message inside - possibly to share a wonderful memory of your friend’s Father (if you have one.) 🕊️
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 16:31     Subject: Should a sympathy card include money? If so how much?
My Mexican cleaner’s father just died. I put $100 in the card. Now I’m hoping he wasn’t offended. No idea about Mexican norms.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 16:26     Subject: Should a sympathy card include money? If so how much?
We got to pay for the priest to pray??
Anonymous
Post 06/26/2024 17:57     Subject: Re:Should a sympathy card include money? If so how much?
I am a firm believer in sending money as a token. You never know what expenses might come up. I’d send a check. If they don’t need it, they can donate it.
Anonymous
Post 06/26/2024 12:42     Subject: Should a sympathy card include money? If so how much?
I put at least $400 if they're family and $200 if they are friend/acquaintance.
Anonymous
Post 06/26/2024 12:34     Subject: Re:Should a sympathy card include money? If so how much?
In Hawaii, it is the norm to always include money (“koden”) in a sympathy card, whether you attend the funeral or not. It would be unthinkable not to do this, no matter your cultural background.
Anonymous
Post 06/25/2024 16:30     Subject: Should a sympathy card include money? If so how much?
Must be different in different cultures. Not something done in my community/culture.