Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I belong to a pool that has a swim team.

My kids dont swim on the team.

These swim team parents can be nuts. There are women who get very invested in being swim team mom and make it their lives and want it to be everyone else's lives as well. I hear them talking at the pool and see requests for volunteers, etc. Someone even asked ME to volunteer once, and tried to make me feel guilty about saying no!! When I don't have a kid on the team!

Here's the thing. A lot of these "MUST" volunteer activities are BS. You don't need a snack bar. You don't need snacks. If you think your kid is going to be hungry, bring snacks for them. You don't need to make damn gift bags for a swim banquet. You don't need a crafts table. Furthermore, I see parents doing jobs teenagers could do. Why aren't the teenagers out stacking and unstacking the chairs, for example?

Parents need to streamline the volunteer duties down to the absolute necessities. Don't ask people to spend their time doing stupid BS like gift bags.

People are going to hate on this because you don’t have a kid on the team, but you make legitimate points that maybe people in the thick of it can’t see. There are definitely extraneous volunteer positions, outside of deck positions at meets, that you can do without. The point about the set up and take down of meets being handled by teens is a legitimate one. For the people that want to pay to outsource their volunteer requirements it would be pretty easy to recruit teens to do some roles for pay (set up and take down of meets, timing at a meet they aren’t swimming in). One of the problems is people with the mindset of “it’s always been done this way so this is what we are doing” and an unwillingness to explore other ways of doing things.

Our teens do set-up and take down for free, lol. They are awesome, and very helpful. Of course, they learned that from watching their parents pitch in and help too.

We don't have a ton of teens who aren't swimming in meets- I'm sure that's different on bigger teams, but it would mean people alternating timing while jumping back and forth to clerk of course. Not impossible, but a logistical nightmare (and at least for A meets, everyone is trying to finish to get the pool open). We do have teens time for B meets, but if this were a paid position, it would be expensive fast. 3 hours X $10 X 3 people X 6 lanes = $500/meet. Not insurmountable, but is it worth it? I'm not sure.

I think the people who don't volunteer don't realize that it's the best way to become a part of the (very welcoming) community. That's the beauty of summer swim! It is a community in a way that most other rec sports are not. We spend a lot of time together in the summer- and even if I don't love all the people, it is wonderful to have that sense of connection.

I don't really care if other people think it's all crazy, (I always say summer swim is kind of like a cult) but complaining about having to volunteer while still signing up your kid is pretty obnoxious. Either get on board, help to make things better or quit

I didn’t mean the pool should pay the teens to do things like time at meets they aren’t swimming in or do set up and take down for meets, the parents that want to buy their way out of volunteering can sign up for one of those slots and then pay one of the teens directly to do it for them. My teen would 100% time some B meets for a little cash. Have a sign up genius slot for teens willing to fill a volunteer slot for money and let the parents who want to pay a kid to fill their volunteer slot get a teen off the list to do that for them.

As part of the team, why does your teen need to get paid to volunteer? They can volunteer if they want to. To be paid, my teen gets $19 an hour as a lifeguard. Whose going to pay that to a teen for the 3-4 hours for a meet? You and your teen are selfish if you expect them to be paid. That's not the point of team. If they want to get paid, they can coach.

You’re not understanding. People are complaining about the fact that parents are being allowed to pay their way out of volunteering which does nothing to fill empty volunteer slots. This way, people can pay their way out of volunteering but not leave empty volunteer slots that need to be filled. My kid should absolutely get paid to fill a volunteer slot that an adult wants to pay their way out of since we as a family already meet our volunteer requirement. And yes, the parents in this area who have money but are too important to volunteer will pay someone $60-80 to time for them for a few hours in the hot sun. They are already paying the buy out, this way at least a slot is still getting filled.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:why does it seem so hard to get anyone to volunteer to help these days?

is it a generational parent thing that parents w younger kids just assume someone else will do it?

it takes a village but it doesn’t seem to compute as the older parents look to pass the torch

Its way more expensive to live most places now, more families are dual income working parents with demanding full time jobs, fewer hobby jobs etc that allows volunteering

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:why does it seem so hard to get anyone to volunteer to help these days?

is it a generational parent thing that parents w younger kids just assume someone else will do it?

it takes a village but it doesn’t seem to compute as the older parents look to pass the torch

Its way more expensive to live most places now, more families are dual income working parents with demanding full time jobs, fewer hobby jobs etc that allows volunteering

Anonymous wrote:why does it seem so hard to get anyone to volunteer to help these days?

is it a generational parent thing that parents w younger kids just assume someone else will do it?

it takes a village but it doesn’t seem to compute as the older parents look to pass the torch

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I sign up to volunteer for another type of organization. I did so because I thought I’d build a community while supporting my kid. The only jobs available jobs clearly no one else wanted and required me to work alone. So didn’t meet anyone. Like it was so clicky there only friends did “team work” items - like planning events.

I volunteer a lot for another organization and am one of the few. It is so much better because as a volunteer you get to know people by working together and get to influence decisions about the organization and learn how things work.

For the first I’m going to do the bare minimum next year to not get fined. Sucks for them as they are now begging for volunteers.

When my daughter does swim for the first time this year and will only do the bare minimum. First organization ruined it for me.

Your bad experience at another organization has nothing to do with swim. Even if you have a bad team rep (and we've had several) still not an excuse.

I didn’t say I wouldn’t volunteer. I will do is required and nothing more. Maybe swim will surprise me.

Anonymous wrote:I sign up to volunteer for another type of organization. I did so because I thought I’d build a community while supporting my kid. The only jobs available jobs clearly no one else wanted and required me to work alone. So didn’t meet anyone. Like it was so clicky there only friends did “team work” items - like planning events.

I volunteer a lot for another organization and am one of the few. It is so much better because as a volunteer you get to know people by working together and get to influence decisions about the organization and learn how things work.

For the first I’m going to do the bare minimum next year to not get fined. Sucks for them as they are now begging for volunteers.

When my daughter does swim for the first time this year and will only do the bare minimum. First organization ruined it for me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I belong to a pool that has a swim team.

My kids dont swim on the team.

These swim team parents can be nuts. There are women who get very invested in being swim team mom and make it their lives and want it to be everyone else's lives as well. I hear them talking at the pool and see requests for volunteers, etc. Someone even asked ME to volunteer once, and tried to make me feel guilty about saying no!! When I don't have a kid on the team!

Here's the thing. A lot of these "MUST" volunteer activities are BS. You don't need a snack bar. You don't need snacks. If you think your kid is going to be hungry, bring snacks for them. You don't need to make damn gift bags for a swim banquet. You don't need a crafts table. Furthermore, I see parents doing jobs teenagers could do. Why aren't the teenagers out stacking and unstacking the chairs, for example?

Parents need to streamline the volunteer duties down to the absolute necessities. Don't ask people to spend their time doing stupid BS like gift bags.

People are going to hate on this because you don’t have a kid on the team, but you make legitimate points that maybe people in the thick of it can’t see. There are definitely extraneous volunteer positions, outside of deck positions at meets, that you can do without. The point about the set up and take down of meets being handled by teens is a legitimate one. For the people that want to pay to outsource their volunteer requirements it would be pretty easy to recruit teens to do some roles for pay (set up and take down of meets, timing at a meet they aren’t swimming in). One of the problems is people with the mindset of “it’s always been done this way so this is what we are doing” and an unwillingness to explore other ways of doing things.

Our teens do set-up and take down for free, lol. They are awesome, and very helpful. Of course, they learned that from watching their parents pitch in and help too.

We don't have a ton of teens who aren't swimming in meets- I'm sure that's different on bigger teams, but it would mean people alternating timing while jumping back and forth to clerk of course. Not impossible, but a logistical nightmare (and at least for A meets, everyone is trying to finish to get the pool open). We do have teens time for B meets, but if this were a paid position, it would be expensive fast. 3 hours X $10 X 3 people X 6 lanes = $500/meet. Not insurmountable, but is it worth it? I'm not sure.

I think the people who don't volunteer don't realize that it's the best way to become a part of the (very welcoming) community. That's the beauty of summer swim! It is a community in a way that most other rec sports are not. We spend a lot of time together in the summer- and even if I don't love all the people, it is wonderful to have that sense of connection.

I don't really care if other people think it's all crazy, (I always say summer swim is kind of like a cult) but complaining about having to volunteer while still signing up your kid is pretty obnoxious. Either get on board, help to make things better or quit

I didn’t mean the pool should pay the teens to do things like time at meets they aren’t swimming in or do set up and take down for meets, the parents that want to buy their way out of volunteering can sign up for one of those slots and then pay one of the teens directly to do it for them. My teen would 100% time some B meets for a little cash. Have a sign up genius slot for teens willing to fill a volunteer slot for money and let the parents who want to pay a kid to fill their volunteer slot get a teen off the list to do that for them.

As part of the team, why does your teen need to get paid to volunteer? They can volunteer if they want to. To be paid, my teen gets $19 an hour as a lifeguard. Whose going to pay that to a teen for the 3-4 hours for a meet? You and your teen are selfish if you expect them to be paid. That's not the point of team. If they want to get paid, they can coach.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I sign up to volunteer for another type of organization. I did so because I thought I’d build a community while supporting my kid. The only jobs available jobs clearly no one else wanted and required me to work alone. So didn’t meet anyone. Like it was so clicky there only friends did “team work” items - like planning events.

I volunteer a lot for another organization and am one of the few. It is so much better because as a volunteer you get to know people by working together and get to influence decisions about the organization and learn how things work.

For the first I’m going to do the bare minimum next year to not get fined. Sucks for them as they are now begging for volunteers.

When my daughter does swim for the first time this year and will only do the bare minimum. First organization ruined it for me.

Your bad experience at another organization has nothing to do with swim. Even if you have a bad team rep (and we've had several) still not an excuse.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not signing my kids up for swim team - so saying I don't respect an activity that somehow needs 36 parent volunteers to run a swim meet -- that's just information in case you'd like to know -- you all sound crazy needing so many volunteers.

If the system doesn't work -- change it.

That’s the thing- this isn’t unique to swim. Every year our rec sports league is begging for parents to volunteer to coach. And that’s only 2 parents needed for a dozen kids or so.

DP. Yes it is. You really can’t see the difference between needing 2 volunteers to coach a rec team or be team managers in other sports and the roughly 20-25 (or more) volunteers needed at EACH swim meet?? Another difference is that your kid won’t get kicked off the rec team if you don’t volunteer to coach, yet you are fine kicking kids off the swim team if their parents don’t volunteer. Should we presume that you are volunteering for every single sport and activity your kids do since you feel so strongly about it?

PP is right that all of you sound crazy advocating for a system that clearly isn’t working any longer. There have been suggestions on this thread about how to address this and every single one got shot down essentially because “that’s just not how it is.”

My kids play rec soccer. Each game there are essentially 3 volunteers- 2 coaches and a parent to bring snacks. 3 volunteers for 10 players.

Summer swim meets require roughly 30 volunteers, split with the other team we need to provide 15-16 of them for 180 swimmers.

15-16 volunteers for roughly 80-120 swimmers at the average A meet for each team. There’s no reason to not have enough volunteers.

Are you really adverse to volunteering and being involved with your children’s activities?

My kids used to play rec soccer too. There is absolutely no need for a snack volunteer. One perfect example of a completely unnecessary volunteer role. Our rec teams decided to do away with snack when people didn’t want to bring any.

I lead my DD’s Girl Scout troop and my DH is the team manger for our DS’s club sports team. Both of these roles are very time consuming. And no, I’d rather not stand outside in the blazing sun in 90 degree weather for hours to be a timer or run the snack bar (again why is a snack bar even necessary??). I’ve been a timer on many occasions but it’s absolutely miserable and the teams do nothing to make it more comfortable for the volunteers. We had 2 people pass out last year due to heat. This (and the attitudes of the swim moms as displayed here) are why people want nothing to do with volunteering for this particular activity.

So why not figure out a way to make it easier and more comfortable for people to get involved instead of bashing them for not being as into swim as you are?

Tell me you’re a millennial without telling me you’re a millennial!! lol

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I belong to a pool that has a swim team.

My kids dont swim on the team.

These swim team parents can be nuts. There are women who get very invested in being swim team mom and make it their lives and want it to be everyone else's lives as well. I hear them talking at the pool and see requests for volunteers, etc. Someone even asked ME to volunteer once, and tried to make me feel guilty about saying no!! When I don't have a kid on the team!

Here's the thing. A lot of these "MUST" volunteer activities are BS. You don't need a snack bar. You don't need snacks. If you think your kid is going to be hungry, bring snacks for them. You don't need to make damn gift bags for a swim banquet. You don't need a crafts table. Furthermore, I see parents doing jobs teenagers could do. Why aren't the teenagers out stacking and unstacking the chairs, for example?

Parents need to streamline the volunteer duties down to the absolute necessities. Don't ask people to spend their time doing stupid BS like gift bags.

People are going to hate on this because you don’t have a kid on the team, but you make legitimate points that maybe people in the thick of it can’t see. There are definitely extraneous volunteer positions, outside of deck positions at meets, that you can do without. The point about the set up and take down of meets being handled by teens is a legitimate one. For the people that want to pay to outsource their volunteer requirements it would be pretty easy to recruit teens to do some roles for pay (set up and take down of meets, timing at a meet they aren’t swimming in). One of the problems is people with the mindset of “it’s always been done this way so this is what we are doing” and an unwillingness to explore other ways of doing things.

Our teens do set-up and take down for free, lol. They are awesome, and very helpful. Of course, they learned that from watching their parents pitch in and help too.

We don't have a ton of teens who aren't swimming in meets- I'm sure that's different on bigger teams, but it would mean people alternating timing while jumping back and forth to clerk of course. Not impossible, but a logistical nightmare (and at least for A meets, everyone is trying to finish to get the pool open). We do have teens time for B meets, but if this were a paid position, it would be expensive fast. 3 hours X $10 X 3 people X 6 lanes = $500/meet. Not insurmountable, but is it worth it? I'm not sure.

I think the people who don't volunteer don't realize that it's the best way to become a part of the (very welcoming) community. That's the beauty of summer swim! It is a community in a way that most other rec sports are not. We spend a lot of time together in the summer- and even if I don't love all the people, it is wonderful to have that sense of connection.

I don't really care if other people think it's all crazy, (I always say summer swim is kind of like a cult) but complaining about having to volunteer while still signing up your kid is pretty obnoxious. Either get on board, help to make things better or quit

I didn’t mean the pool should pay the teens to do things like time at meets they aren’t swimming in or do set up and take down for meets, the parents that want to buy their way out of volunteering can sign up for one of those slots and then pay one of the teens directly to do it for them. My teen would 100% time some B meets for a little cash. Have a sign up genius slot for teens willing to fill a volunteer slot for money and let the parents who want to pay a kid to fill their volunteer slot get a teen off the list to do that for them.

As part of the team, why does your teen need to get paid to volunteer? They can volunteer if they want to. To be paid, my teen gets $19 an hour as a lifeguard. Who's going to pay that to a teen for the 3-4 hours for a meet? You and your teen are selfish if you expect them to be paid. That's not the point of team. If they want to get paid, they can coach.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I belong to a pool that has a swim team.

My kids dont swim on the team.

These swim team parents can be nuts. There are women who get very invested in being swim team mom and make it their lives and want it to be everyone else's lives as well. I hear them talking at the pool and see requests for volunteers, etc. Someone even asked ME to volunteer once, and tried to make me feel guilty about saying no!! When I don't have a kid on the team!

Here's the thing. A lot of these "MUST" volunteer activities are BS. You don't need a snack bar. You don't need snacks. If you think your kid is going to be hungry, bring snacks for them. You don't need to make damn gift bags for a swim banquet. You don't need a crafts table. Furthermore, I see parents doing jobs teenagers could do. Why aren't the teenagers out stacking and unstacking the chairs, for example?

Parents need to streamline the volunteer duties down to the absolute necessities. Don't ask people to spend their time doing stupid BS like gift bags.

People are going to hate on this because you don’t have a kid on the team, but you make legitimate points that maybe people in the thick of it can’t see. There are definitely extraneous volunteer positions, outside of deck positions at meets, that you can do without. The point about the set up and take down of meets being handled by teens is a legitimate one. For the people that want to pay to outsource their volunteer requirements it would be pretty easy to recruit teens to do some roles for pay (set up and take down of meets, timing at a meet they aren’t swimming in). One of the problems is people with the mindset of “it’s always been done this way so this is what we are doing” and an unwillingness to explore other ways of doing things.

Our teens do set-up and take down for free, lol. They are awesome, and very helpful. Of course, they learned that from watching their parents pitch in and help too.

We don't have a ton of teens who aren't swimming in meets- I'm sure that's different on bigger teams, but it would mean people alternating timing while jumping back and forth to clerk of course. Not impossible, but a logistical nightmare (and at least for A meets, everyone is trying to finish to get the pool open). We do have teens time for B meets, but if this were a paid position, it would be expensive fast. 3 hours X $10 X 3 people X 6 lanes = $500/meet. Not insurmountable, but is it worth it? I'm not sure.

I think the people who don't volunteer don't realize that it's the best way to become a part of the (very welcoming) community. That's the beauty of summer swim! It is a community in a way that most other rec sports are not. We spend a lot of time together in the summer- and even if I don't love all the people, it is wonderful to have that sense of connection.

I don't really care if other people think it's all crazy, (I always say summer swim is kind of like a cult) but complaining about having to volunteer while still signing up your kid is pretty obnoxious. Either get on board, help to make things better or quit

I didn’t mean the pool should pay the teens to do things like time at meets they aren’t swimming in or do set up and take down for meets, the parents that want to buy their way out of volunteering can sign up for one of those slots and then pay one of the teens directly to do it for them. My teen would 100% time some B meets for a little cash. Have a sign up genius slot for teens willing to fill a volunteer slot for money and let the parents who want to pay a kid to fill their volunteer slot get a teen off the list to do that for them.

As part of the team, why does your teen need to get paid to volunteer? They can volunteer if they want to. To be paid, my teen gets $19 an hour as a lifeguard. Whose going to pay that to a teen for the 3-4 hours for a meet? You and your teen are selfish if you expect them to be paid. That's not the point of team. If they want to get paid, they can coach.

Anonymous wrote:I sign up to volunteer for another type of organization. I did so because I thought I’d build a community while supporting my kid. The only jobs available jobs clearly no one else wanted and required me to work alone. So didn’t meet anyone. Like it was so clicky there only friends did “team work” items - like planning events.

I volunteer a lot for another organization and am one of the few. It is so much better because as a volunteer you get to know people by working together and get to influence decisions about the organization and learn how things work.

For the first I’m going to do the bare minimum next year to not get fined. Sucks for them as they are now begging for volunteers.

When my daughter does swim for the first time this year and will only do the bare minimum. First organization ruined it for me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I belong to a pool that has a swim team.

My kids dont swim on the team.

These swim team parents can be nuts. There are women who get very invested in being swim team mom and make it their lives and want it to be everyone else's lives as well. I hear them talking at the pool and see requests for volunteers, etc. Someone even asked ME to volunteer once, and tried to make me feel guilty about saying no!! When I don't have a kid on the team!

Here's the thing. A lot of these "MUST" volunteer activities are BS. You don't need a snack bar. You don't need snacks. If you think your kid is going to be hungry, bring snacks for them. You don't need to make damn gift bags for a swim banquet. You don't need a crafts table. Furthermore, I see parents doing jobs teenagers could do. Why aren't the teenagers out stacking and unstacking the chairs, for example?

Parents need to streamline the volunteer duties down to the absolute necessities. Don't ask people to spend their time doing stupid BS like gift bags.

People are going to hate on this because you don’t have a kid on the team, but you make legitimate points that maybe people in the thick of it can’t see. There are definitely extraneous volunteer positions, outside of deck positions at meets, that you can do without. The point about the set up and take down of meets being handled by teens is a legitimate one. For the people that want to pay to outsource their volunteer requirements it would be pretty easy to recruit teens to do some roles for pay (set up and take down of meets, timing at a meet they aren’t swimming in). One of the problems is people with the mindset of “it’s always been done this way so this is what we are doing” and an unwillingness to explore other ways of doing things.

Our teens do set-up and take down for free, lol. They are awesome, and very helpful. Of course, they learned that from watching their parents pitch in and help too.

We don't have a ton of teens who aren't swimming in meets- I'm sure that's different on bigger teams, but it would mean people alternating timing while jumping back and forth to clerk of course. Not impossible, but a logistical nightmare (and at least for A meets, everyone is trying to finish to get the pool open). We do have teens time for B meets, but if this were a paid position, it would be expensive fast. 3 hours X $10 X 3 people X 6 lanes = $500/meet. Not insurmountable, but is it worth it? I'm not sure.

I think the people who don't volunteer don't realize that it's the best way to become a part of the (very welcoming) community. That's the beauty of summer swim! It is a community in a way that most other rec sports are not. We spend a lot of time together in the summer- and even if I don't love all the people, it is wonderful to have that sense of connection.

I don't really care if other people think it's all crazy, (I always say summer swim is kind of like a cult) but complaining about having to volunteer while still signing up your kid is pretty obnoxious. Either get on board, help to make things better or quit

I didn’t mean the pool should pay the teens to do things like time at meets they aren’t swimming in or do set up and take down for meets, the parents that want to buy their way out of volunteering can sign up for one of those slots and then pay one of the teens directly to do it for them. My teen would 100% time some B meets for a little cash. Have a sign up genius slot for teens willing to fill a volunteer slot for money and let the parents who want to pay a kid to fill their volunteer slot get a teen off the list to do that for them.

Anonymous wrote:I think what sometimes gets lost in these conversations is the point of rec league swim.

These teams are meant to be fun, community-driven, healthy, all-in summer experiences. They’re not the same as year-round club swimming. If you want your kids to get the full magic of summer swim, you kind of have to be part of that community too—just paying a fee and opting out of everything else doesn’t really create that experience.

Having grown up in Northern Virginia Swim League and now being on the back end of my own kid’s time in it, I do feel like some of that intention has shifted a bit with how competitive things have become.

When I was a kid, the pool was our summer. We biked there (starting way younger than people would be comfortable with now), stayed all day, and went home at dinner. There wasn’t a rigid volunteer schedule—parents just showed up when they could, kept an eye on things, and pitched in where needed. Somehow it all worked because there was a shared understanding: this was our team, our kids, our community.

Every parent knew every kid. If you were at the pool, you were part of the family.

I know things are different now, and structure is necessary. But the core idea still matters. If you’re not in it for the community, you’re missing a big part of what makes summer swim special. At that point, lessons or year-round club might be a better fit—because rec swim really is about showing up, pitching in, and being part of something bigger than just your own swimmer.